Friday 1 January 2016

One Yanks View Of Britain

Scott Waters visited our country from Florida, staying with family and friends around the country for a few weeks and on his return to America he posted a list of the things that struck him most about the British and Britain on Facebook.

I was in England again a few weeks ago, mostly in small towns, but here's some of what I learned:

* Almost everyone is very polite
* The food is generally outstanding
* There are no guns
* There are too many narrow stairs
* Everything is just a little bit different
* The pubs close too early
* You'd better like peas, potatoes and sausage
* Refrigerators and washing machines are very small
* Everything is generally older, smaller and shorter
* People don't seem to be afraid of their neighbors or the government
* Their paper money makes sense, the coins don't
* Everyone has a washing machine but driers are rare
* Hot and cold water faucets. Remember them?
* Pants are called "trousers", underwear are "pants" and sweaters are "jumpers"
* The bathroom light is a string hanging from the ceiling
* "Fanny" is a naughty word, as is "shag"
* All the signs are well designed with beautiful typography and written in full sentences with proper grammar.
* There's no dress code
* Doors close by themselves, but they don't always open
* They eat with their forks upside down
* There are hardly any cops or police cars
* Everything comes with chips, which are French fries. You put vinegar on them
* Cookies are "biscuits" and potato chips are "crisps"
* Obama is considered a hero, Bush is considered an idiot.
* The water controls in showers need detailed instructions
* Nearly everyone is better educated then we are
* If someone buys you a drink you must do the same
* There are no guns
* Avoid British wine and French beer
* Many of the roads are the size of our sidewalks
* There's no AC
* Instead of turning the heat up, you put on a jumper
* You don't have to tip, really!
* You pay the price marked on products because the taxes (VAT) are built in
* They took the street signs down during WWII, but haven't put them all back up yet
* Everyone enjoys a good joke
* There are no guns
* You can get on a bus and end up in Paris
* Everyone knows more about our history then we do
* Radio is still a big deal. The BBC is quite good
* The newspapers can be awful
* Butter and eggs aren't refrigerated
* The money is easy to understand. There are no quarters.
* Cars don't have bumper stickers
* Many doorknobs, buildings and tools are older than America
* By law, there are no crappy, old cars
* When the sign says something was built in 456, they didn't lose the "1"
* Cake is pudding, ice cream is pudding, anything served for dessert is pudding, even pudding
* Soccer is a religion, religion is a sport
* Europeans dress better then the British, we dress worse
* Drinks don't come with ice
* They don't use Bose anything anywhere
* Displaying your political or religious affiliation is considered very bad taste
* Their healthcare works, but they still bitch about it
* Their coffee is mediocre but their tea is wonderful
* There are still no guns

4 comments:

Liber - Latin for "The Free One" said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Liber - Latin for "The Free One" said...

Everyone I know that has visited Britain had nothing but kind words about it. France, not so. But by far, Italy is the nation that Americans cannot stop talking about. Love love love Italy.

Falling on a bruise said...

Italy is lovely, Italians maybe not quite so much.

Liber - Latin for "The Free One" said...
This comment has been removed by the author.