If you’re reading this, one of two things is true: either you’re still alive and scrolling aimlessly, or you’ve finally tracked down the ghost of a 70s footballer so let me cut to the chase, you’re here because you want to know about my life, my career, and how I tragically exited this earthly pitch. Spoiler: it involved pancreatic cancer, not a tackle.
But hey, let’s not dwell on the how, let’s celebrate the why. Buckle up and listen to how I went from kicking tins to kicking goals.
I was born in Scotland but even as a kid, I knew I was destined for greatness because while other boys were playing keepy-uppy with their socks, I was dribbling a tin can around.
My move to Manchester United in 1962? Well, that was the real 'I told you I was special' moment. So good was that team that even the other team supporters started tipping their hats.
In 1968, we won the European Cup. I scored 238 goals for United. I was the first British player to earn a FIFA World Player of the Year nomination but off the field I was a husband, a father, and the master of the 'I’ll do the dishes later' excuse. My wife, Evelyn, put up with me for 63 years.
They put up a statue of me at Old Trafford. It’s me in my prime mid-sprint, muscles flexed an plenty of hair gel and i always envisioned i would go by maybe a heart attack mid-fight with a linesman, or a sudden burst of glory in my 90s, sprinting through a shopping mall like it’s the Champions League.
Instead, I got pain, forgetfulness from the Alzheimer's disease and vascular dementia and the ref blew the final whistle.

who, never heard of her... read the bio and already forgot all of it
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