Special Guest Blogger: Greek Goddess Astraeus

Hello, dear readers or should I say hello judges and lawyers because I’m the the original Goddess of Justice, though I’m reliably informed I’ve since become the chick in the sky with the scales. Blimey.
The Golden Age of Humanity was a riot. I descended from the heavens all wide-eyed and wielding a sword (because nothing says fairness like looking like you’ll slice someone’s head off), determined to make the world a better place. My mission? To root out injustice, balance the scales of morality, and generally act as a very posh morale officer.
My first mistake? Assuming humans would appreciate me.
Imagine, if you will, a Bronze Age village. A man steals a goat. Another man insults a priest. A third man just wants to know why the river’s upstream. My job, I thought, was to intervene, to bring order to the chaos. Instead, I got a crowd of 300 all shouting, 'Sort them out, Astraea'.
Honestly, it was like herding cats and by the time I’d decided the goat needed to be returned and the insults needed to be quantified in livestock, someone had set the village on fire. Justice, I realised, was not a popularity contest.
I tried. I really did. I adjudicated disputes, judged the guilty, and even let my hair down (metaphorically as virgins can’t literally do that, obviously) to mingle with the masses. But then came the Iron Age, and with it, professional injustice and kings who thought fair meant because I say so.
One day,I simply left. Poets say I ascended to the stars in a blaze of glory, transforming into the constellation Virgo. Rubbish. What actually happened? I stormed off. Yes. After a particularly egregious case of a tyrant executing a farmer for thinking incorrectly, I muttered, 'Right, that's it, sod the lot of you' and took the scenic route to the afterlife.  I just departed in the same way that one departs a party when it’s clear no one is paying attention to what you’re saying about the weather.
I gathered my sword, my scales, and my dignity and I marched toward the sky  and thus, Virgo was born, eternally peering down at Earth with the disdain of a goddess who tried to fix the human world and make it fair and failed gloriously.