It's All Very Dr. Moreauish

It is outrageous that the Taliban tried to blow up Dick Cheney. They would of had a much better chance of success if they had used a sniper rifle or a shoulder launched grenade.
Talking of half human, half other species, i find the whole debate over whether or not to create embryos that are part-human, part-animal, as unnerving.
I know that scientists claim they could use the cross species to research lifesaving stem cell therapies and treatments for diseases such as Parkinson's, Alzheimer's and cystic fibrosis.
The researchers would take a cell from a patient and insert it into an animal egg to make an embryo. Embryonic stem cells extracted from the embryo would then be grown into nerves and other tissues, giving scientists unprecedented insight into how the disease develops in the body.
It seems to have overtures of 'The Island of Dr. Moreau' about it to me which all leads nicely to that well worn joke about a friends boyfriend who likes to tell everyone that he is an animal in the bedroom.
He poops in the corner.

You Should Never Come Back

Hollywood filmmaker James Cameron claims to have discovered the tomb of Jesus Christ which contains the remains of Mary Magdalene and possibly their son Judah.
Now if my shaky grip on Christianity is right, this is the second time the Lord has come out of retirement but this time he has bought the family with him.
Ask any veteran of the entertainment industry and they will tell you that you should never return once you have retired. In Jesus's case the first time, when he did the water-into-wine and the multiplying of the fishes things, he may have been cutting edge but David Blaine would knock him into a cocked hat these days.
In other news, the original basket used by the Easter Bunny has been discovered in a field by a Wisconsin Farmer and a tiny leather satchel with the initials TF etched on the side has been identified as the Tooth Fairy's. Big teethed children everywhere are being described as 'excited'.

Getting In A Flap

News of mankind's impending doom seem to come and go with regularity but somehow we are still managing to survive to wreak havoc for all the other creatures of the planet. The latest scare to our continuation as a species came in the form of Bird Flu last week when it turned up in East England which much fanfare and doom from the media but was largely shrugged off by the bored general public.
Not to dismiss the seriousness of anyone who has contracted this disease but it's name does not strike fear into the heart of the population. The Black Death, The Plague, Ebola virus or even methicillin resistant Staphylococcus aureus all have mighty names that command you take them serious.
The phrase "bird flu" conjures up visions of mallards sucking down Lemsip and pigeons cradling the telephone in one weak wing and croaking, "No, I'm sorry, I can't come in and poop on any windscreens today - I think I'm coming down with something."
Maybe scientists could name it wing-borne obliteration and give us a proper go at worrying ourselves to an earlier grave.

Who's The Daddy?

Anne Nichole Smith's young child is going to have a headache when Fathers Day comes around and there must be quite a bit of head scratching going on in the Windsor household when Harry writes his fathers name on the cards envelope.
Diana and James Hewitt (left) began there affair in 1982 and continued it until 1992 with a little bundle of Harryness (centre) arriving in 1986 in the middle of their fling.
Whispered rumours ever since have circulated that Hewitt is the natural father and Buck House have refused to allow Harry to take a DNA test to prove who's the daddy. Don't know if it is just me but look at the pics above and tell me there is no smoke from this Royal fire.

Harry Off To War

Prince Harry is well known for not being the sharpest bulb in the box. The third in line to the throne even needed help to pass his A level art, and you need to be a doofus of biblical proportions to fail art.
To show just how in touch with his Grans public the ginger haired royal is, he's apparently chomping at the bit to go to that smoking hole we used to call Iraq just as everyone else is coming back. He will be expected to wear the uniform of the British Army (minus the safety features and boots of course) and not the Nazi uniform that he favoured a few years back.
To be fair to the man who looks suspiciously like James Hewitt who was having an affair with Princess Diana at the time of his conception (hmmmm), he could of tugged the strings to keep his lazy backside in safety but he chose not to. An even better statement would of been to refuse to go because this war is a wrong'un, not like they would slam him in the Tower. And if they did he would gets lots of time brush up on his watercolours.

Once Bitten

The term "deja vu" is French for "already seen" and describes the feeling that one has witnessed or experienced a new situation previously.
The ever cheerful George Santayana stated that those who cannot learn from History are doomed to repeat it.
And so Mr Santayana is proved correct once again as the UN dismisses the intelligence on Iran's nuclear facilities provided to inspectors by US spy agencies.
The claims, spookily reminiscent of the intelligence fiasco surrounding the Iraq war,
about supposed secret weapons sites provided by the CIA and other US intelligence agencies have led to dead ends when investigated by IAEA inspectors, according to UN sources.
"Most of it has turned out to be incorrect," a diplomat at the IAEA said.
"They gave us a paper with a list of sites. We did some follow-up and went to some military sites, but there was no sign of banned nuclear activities".
Seems the leaders may not of learned anything but we have, we have especially taken on board that we cannot believe a word anyone associated with the invasion of Iraq is saying.

Caption Competition #3

Always a rich seam of humour, the Pope entertaining the American President.
My line would be : "Yo Pope, is this one as good as My Pet Goat?"

Nothing To See Here

Would all the Canadians, Americans, Swedes & Australians, Israeli and the one South African who visit here please look away now.
That's it, nothing to see here. Not posting anything so you may as well move onto the Caption Competition. See ya.
Right, iMuslim, Little Cheese, you still there?
I have been looking about the blogosphere trying to make contact with some British blogs and i stumbled across some right wing extremist blogs, BNP and anti-everyone else and all that sort of thing. And there was lots of them. And they were all extreme.
I think if we keep it quiet and don't mention it we can keep a lid on this and the World will continue to think of us Brits as upstanding citizens of the World Community and not as a bunch of moronic idiots with knuckles that scrape the floor when we walk.
Your right Little Cheese, but there is nothing we can do about the Royal Family, just no mentioning the other ones who are a disgrace to us Brits.

Just A Moment Mr. Blair

Seems i may have to hand in my sandals because i am in danger of being thrown out of the lefty muesli eating brigade.
The big news here is the withdrawal of the British troops from Iraq, which to my like minded friends is great news, three cheers and vegetarian sausages for everyone. The thing is, it may be excellent news for the soldiers and their families but is it good news for the Iraqis?
In case anyone has forgotten, it was us who wrecked their country, killed 650,000 of their people and filled their country with real terrorists and not the ones in Tony Blair's/George Bush's minds.
Blair said that the British part of the country is safe to hand over to the Iraqis so its mission accomplished and let's all get off home. As we are ducking out, Baghdad goes to hell in a handcart and the USA are sending an extra 21,000 troops to try and sort it out.
Call me fickle, but don't we have a moral obligation to cease the mayhem we introduced in the whole country before we naff off home?
OK, i will hand in my tie dye t-shirt & beads at the door on the way out.

Loose Change Conspiracy Theory

Conspiracy theories are usually confined to the edges where the loony tunes and anti-socialites live. Sometimes one such theory moves into the mainstream but it generally gets shot down in flames and creeps back to the fringes with its tail between its legs.
The latest, the theory that the Bush Government created and acted out the September 11th attack, is being driven by the documentary Loose Change.
As the buzz continues to grow over this film which sets out to put facts behind the theories, i sat with a group of like-minded friends to watch it.
Sixty minutes or so later any doubts i had were banished. This really is the work of dangerous morons with shoddy and ludicrous conclusions.
Anyone who actually takes at face value what they see in this film deserves to be ridiculed.
We have enough on Bush and his crowd without jumping on this far fetched conspiracy.
Bin Laden orchestrated the attacks and although you have the freedom to make up your own mind, we also have the freedom to call you a gullible fool if you are taken in by this.