Strangely, I wasn’t even American but Romanian and moved to America early in my life and loved nothing more than swimming in the Ocean and i was pretty good and entered swimming competitions which i won and got me into the Illinois Athletic Club (yep, i'm as American as Apple Pie i lied) and was the that of me swimming my way to stardom, as long as they never found out i was actually as American as a Steak and Kidney Pie.
Over the course of my swimming career, I set 67 world records and grabbed international attention at the 1924 Olympics in Paris, France with three Gold medals and then i competed in the 1928 Olympic Games in Amsterdam and led the American athletes as the standard bearer during the opening ceremony and snagged a further two golds and retired to become a model and actor and got asked to audition for the upcoming Tarzan the Ape Man film which i got and they even wrote some additional scenes to make sure there was lots of swimming in it and not much dialogue although i knew i wasn't hired for my acting skills, i looked buff dressed only in a loin cloth.
I started on a 17-year run as the character but it almost ended straight away as the chimpanzee that played Cheetah attacked me the very first day on set so i bopped him on the head as advised to gain dominance which worked too well because every time my Jane came near me, he attacked her instead.
During filming I invented that famous Tarzan yell, basing it on the yodeling that i learnt as a kid which saved my life later on but i was getting too old to be swinging around on vines so i retired and married a golfer, Allene Gates, and toured the World playing in golf tournaments and exhibitions including Cuba where we visited for a celebrity golf tournament and the only reason I left with his head still on his shoulders was because of that famous Tarzan yell.
A group of Fidel Castro's revolutionaries stopped us and with so many guns pointed at us, I stood up in the vehicle and gave my famous Tarzan yell. The revolutionaries instantly recognised me and insisted on being our escort to and from the tournament.
It later turned out that my business manager had been swindling me out of my millions and my wife, not interested in being with a poor former ape man, upped and left leaving me without a wife and my fortune.
By now I was no longer the perfect physical I had once been and broke both my hip and leg in an accident which happily led to the discovery of a serious heart condition but less happily 1980's medicine couldn't help me and after a series of strokes i died at the age of 79 but at least i outlived that bloody chimp
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