There are a number of different ways of measuring intelligence but the most widely accepted method is by measuring a person's 'intelligence quotient' or IQ which is a series of tests which assess mathematical, spatial, verbal, logic and memory.
The average IQ is between 90 and 110 and in the World Rankings Hong Kong and Singapore are top with an average of 108, the UK is joint 7th with an average of 100, Canada and Germany joint 8th with 99, Australia, France, USA and Spain joint 9th with 98 while poor old Equatorial Guinea are bottom with an average of just 59.
Over the last 100 years our IQ scores have been steadily increasing but the trend is slowing and scientists are expecting it to start falling back which means that our generation could be the peak of human intelligence.
Our brains have stayed the same size over the last 70,000 years and IQ's most improved over the last 100 years at a rate of around three points a decade with improvements in the environment, health and education standards.
However since the mid-90s, the average IQ dropped by around 0.2 points a year and science is struggling to find a reason behind it but i have a suggestion, technology which most came to the fore around the time the IQ began to drop.
Calculators do the maths for us, we no longer have to know our times tables or work out percentages and i have seen a scary drop in spelling amongst the upcoming generations once spellcheck is taken away.
Where once we had to commit to memory all sorts of facts and figures, we now have Google at our fingertips so why bother to take the time and effort to dates and events when it is quicker and easier to tap it into a search engine.
As less people now read books and newspapers, reading skills will almost certainly be the next big area to dip but of course technology is always going to be with us so what does it matter as long as we have a calculator, a search engine and spellcheck and that is fine but it is the times when you don't have these to hand you will be found wanting.
It may be just a coincidence that the mid-90s was when technology with computers and mobile phones really took off while IQ scores began to fall away but someone with a much higher IQ than me may want to look for a correlation there.
Showing posts with label Other. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Other. Show all posts
Monday, 15 July 2019
Sunday, 31 March 2019
Signs You're A Poindexter
Most people consider themselves to be more intelligent than average but studies have shown that there are some very real signs that are indicative of intelligence.
A study in 2010 found that 'right-wing' adults had an average IQ of 95, while 'left-wing' adults had an average IQ 11 points higher of 106 although looking at some of the right wingers around at the moment seems 95 could be a bit high.
I am a bit anxious about including this one but another study argued that people with high intelligence are more prone to anxiety but i am a very trusting person so i will which just happens to be another trait of the highly intelligent.
A recent study by researchers from the University of Vienna found that black humour was linked to higher intelligence and i can't resist an off colour joke especially if it mocks religion which as studies show, is rejected by those with a few more brain cells than most.
Being an insomniac i have plenty of time to look at studies which find the brightest amongst us are night owls and because i am just too bone idle to write a long post, laziness is a sure fire sign of intelligence.
As a left wing nervous type who rejects religion and stays up late laughing at black comedies and can often be overheard saying 'can't someone else do it' doesn't make me more intelligent, just means that i am able to elucidate and avoid obfuscating people in my own quintessential way without attracting vitriol despite my perfunctory way which sometimes contains non sequitur statements
which by a splendid coincidence just happen to be the top six words also used by highly intelligent people.
Now if only i can somehow find a study that explains that brain boxes like playing punk music loudly and eating chocolate then i feel ready to tackle that Mensa challenge.
A study in 2010 found that 'right-wing' adults had an average IQ of 95, while 'left-wing' adults had an average IQ 11 points higher of 106 although looking at some of the right wingers around at the moment seems 95 could be a bit high.
I am a bit anxious about including this one but another study argued that people with high intelligence are more prone to anxiety but i am a very trusting person so i will which just happens to be another trait of the highly intelligent.
A recent study by researchers from the University of Vienna found that black humour was linked to higher intelligence and i can't resist an off colour joke especially if it mocks religion which as studies show, is rejected by those with a few more brain cells than most.
Being an insomniac i have plenty of time to look at studies which find the brightest amongst us are night owls and because i am just too bone idle to write a long post, laziness is a sure fire sign of intelligence.
As a left wing nervous type who rejects religion and stays up late laughing at black comedies and can often be overheard saying 'can't someone else do it' doesn't make me more intelligent, just means that i am able to elucidate and avoid obfuscating people in my own quintessential way without attracting vitriol despite my perfunctory way which sometimes contains non sequitur statements
which by a splendid coincidence just happen to be the top six words also used by highly intelligent people.
Now if only i can somehow find a study that explains that brain boxes like playing punk music loudly and eating chocolate then i feel ready to tackle that Mensa challenge.
Wednesday, 20 March 2019
The CIA Guide To Spotting Gay Men
A friend recently said that all the best men are either already taken or gay and while there is nothing i can do about the first, the CIA have helpfully detailed the characteristics to look for in a gay man.
In a report dated 1980, the Central Intelligence Agency had the idea of identifying gay men from those they were investigating and use it to blackmail them as gay.
According to the CIA, any man who knew the meaning of 'gay, straight, and bi was definitely gay, since such words were passwords used primarily by gay men.
So if your intended target knows what the word gay means, the next phase is are they hardworking, intelligent, friendly, cooperative and punctual because all these traits are signs of the gay man.
If all the boxes have been ticked so far then it isn't looking good for any future heterosexual relationship but don't despair just yet because the CIA have more surefire ways to tell.
Gay men definitely used public transport because a gay man rarely drives to work and mainly drive at weekends and just to make certain, the final test are do they go shopping by themselves and use the Post Office to send mail.
Although the 'tests' may be almost 40 years, you might want to avoid the afterwork drinks with that friendly guy you saw at the Post Office, especially if he has a bus ticket and kept checking his watch.
In a report dated 1980, the Central Intelligence Agency had the idea of identifying gay men from those they were investigating and use it to blackmail them as gay.
According to the CIA, any man who knew the meaning of 'gay, straight, and bi was definitely gay, since such words were passwords used primarily by gay men.
So if your intended target knows what the word gay means, the next phase is are they hardworking, intelligent, friendly, cooperative and punctual because all these traits are signs of the gay man.
If all the boxes have been ticked so far then it isn't looking good for any future heterosexual relationship but don't despair just yet because the CIA have more surefire ways to tell.
Gay men definitely used public transport because a gay man rarely drives to work and mainly drive at weekends and just to make certain, the final test are do they go shopping by themselves and use the Post Office to send mail.
Although the 'tests' may be almost 40 years, you might want to avoid the afterwork drinks with that friendly guy you saw at the Post Office, especially if he has a bus ticket and kept checking his watch.
Wednesday, 6 March 2019
Top 10 Causes Of Global Deaths
On average, the Global birth rate is 131 million per year while the average death rate is 56 million annually which my calculator shows is averaging a surplus of 75 million of us, give or take a few.
It is an unfortunate fact that death comes to us all at some point and that some point averages out at around 71 and the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation (IHME) have worked out the most likely causes of death.
The biggest killer is cardiovascular disease, which affects the heart and arteries and kills 32.3% of us, double the amount of deaths by various types of Cancer (16.3%).
Respiratory Diseases such as Asthma, Emphysema and Pneumonia claim 6.5%, Diabetes 5.8%, Lower Respiratory Diseases like Bronchitis and Edema account for 4.4%, Dementia 4.4, Neonatal death before the baby reaches 28 days take 3.2%, Diarrhoeal diseases 3%, Road injuries 2.5%,
Liver disease 2.3%.
While the cause of death varies from country to country, the deaths that preoccupy us the most such as terrorism, war and natural disasters make up less than 0.5% of all deaths combined. Globally, twice as many people die by suicide than by murder.
It may make for a sad picture but compared to previous centuries we have made a huge leap in how, when and why we die and improvements in sanitation, hygiene, nutrition, vaccination and basic healthcare are all part of it but we still have a long way to go when Diarrhoea is in the top 10 of the largest global killers and 1.8 million newborns don't make it past 28 days.
It is an unfortunate fact that death comes to us all at some point and that some point averages out at around 71 and the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation (IHME) have worked out the most likely causes of death.
The biggest killer is cardiovascular disease, which affects the heart and arteries and kills 32.3% of us, double the amount of deaths by various types of Cancer (16.3%).
Respiratory Diseases such as Asthma, Emphysema and Pneumonia claim 6.5%, Diabetes 5.8%, Lower Respiratory Diseases like Bronchitis and Edema account for 4.4%, Dementia 4.4, Neonatal death before the baby reaches 28 days take 3.2%, Diarrhoeal diseases 3%, Road injuries 2.5%,
Liver disease 2.3%.
While the cause of death varies from country to country, the deaths that preoccupy us the most such as terrorism, war and natural disasters make up less than 0.5% of all deaths combined. Globally, twice as many people die by suicide than by murder.
It may make for a sad picture but compared to previous centuries we have made a huge leap in how, when and why we die and improvements in sanitation, hygiene, nutrition, vaccination and basic healthcare are all part of it but we still have a long way to go when Diarrhoea is in the top 10 of the largest global killers and 1.8 million newborns don't make it past 28 days.
Saturday, 16 February 2019
Death, Taxes And Runaway Ai
There is a famous line from Daniel Defoe that the only things which are inevitable are death and taxes which means there wasn't an accountancy firm equivalent to whoever does Amazon's and Starbucks books in 17th Century England although death is unavoidable unfortunately.
What isn't inevitable is the way we join the choir invisible so the Center for the Study of Existential Risk have been looking up the biggest threats to humanity.
As a massive asteroid did for the dinosaurs, we face Volcanoes hurling ash into the upper atmosphere, an event that happened 75,000 years ago which led to a dramatic population decline in early humans.
The World Health Organisation and the World Economic Forum both list climate change and its effects as one of their top risks and recent UN talks heard climate change was already 'a matter of life and death for many regions' and the climate change threats keep coming from killer heatwaves, rising sea levels and widespread famines
Artificial Intelligence (AI) rates high enough to be of concern, whether from increasingly sophisticated cyber-weapons to autonomous robots running wild and there is still the ever present threat from nuclear weapons and even a combination of a growing integration of nuclear or conventional weapons and AI.
Global pandemics is yet another risk with increasingly dense and mobile human populations having the potential to see new strains of virus and disease easily spreading along the lines of the 1918 Spanish Flu outbreak which killed 50 million people.
To end on a happier note, the Centre for the Study of Existential Risk put the risk of dying from a pandemic at 1.5%, 0.6% for being killed by a nuclear war and 0.001% that a super volcano will erupt and blot out the sun so don't lose too much sleep over it, HMRC is far more scary especially if you missed the 31 January Tax Return filing deadline.
What isn't inevitable is the way we join the choir invisible so the Center for the Study of Existential Risk have been looking up the biggest threats to humanity.
As a massive asteroid did for the dinosaurs, we face Volcanoes hurling ash into the upper atmosphere, an event that happened 75,000 years ago which led to a dramatic population decline in early humans.
The World Health Organisation and the World Economic Forum both list climate change and its effects as one of their top risks and recent UN talks heard climate change was already 'a matter of life and death for many regions' and the climate change threats keep coming from killer heatwaves, rising sea levels and widespread famines
Artificial Intelligence (AI) rates high enough to be of concern, whether from increasingly sophisticated cyber-weapons to autonomous robots running wild and there is still the ever present threat from nuclear weapons and even a combination of a growing integration of nuclear or conventional weapons and AI.
Global pandemics is yet another risk with increasingly dense and mobile human populations having the potential to see new strains of virus and disease easily spreading along the lines of the 1918 Spanish Flu outbreak which killed 50 million people.
To end on a happier note, the Centre for the Study of Existential Risk put the risk of dying from a pandemic at 1.5%, 0.6% for being killed by a nuclear war and 0.001% that a super volcano will erupt and blot out the sun so don't lose too much sleep over it, HMRC is far more scary especially if you missed the 31 January Tax Return filing deadline.
Sunday, 9 December 2018
Missing The Original Emoticons
Strangely i never got involved in the original emoticon thing but now that we have proper smileys instead on our text and email messages, i kind of miss them. :-(
I never appreciated just how clever making faces out of the punctuation keys on the keyboard was to show how cheerful :-) or sad :-( or surprised :-0 or angry >:( or confused :-/ or cheeky ;-) the sender was.
My phone automatically changes any emoticon to a proper smiley face when i try it now but that's our changing times and i could weep for kids that never knew what once passed for text based fun. That's :'-(
As the younger generation doesn't seem to know how to punctuate anything, they at least have something to do with all those redundant buttons on the keyboard so as the original text based emoticon is now dead, i'd better send some flowers, or @-->-->- @-->-->-
I never appreciated just how clever making faces out of the punctuation keys on the keyboard was to show how cheerful :-) or sad :-( or surprised :-0 or angry >:( or confused :-/ or cheeky ;-) the sender was.
My phone automatically changes any emoticon to a proper smiley face when i try it now but that's our changing times and i could weep for kids that never knew what once passed for text based fun. That's :'-(
As the younger generation doesn't seem to know how to punctuate anything, they at least have something to do with all those redundant buttons on the keyboard so as the original text based emoticon is now dead, i'd better send some flowers, or @-->-->- @-->-->-
Tuesday, 27 November 2018
My Anti-Ageing Cream Smells Funny
Move over Estee Lauders Revitalising Cream because there is a new anti-ageing cream in town and this one leaves your face as smooth as a baby's, well, foreskin because the next big thing is a serum derived from South Korean babies’ circumcised penises.
Nothing weird with that at all, it's perfectly normal to want to have the liquidised foreskins of multiple babies rubbed all over your face and if it's good enough for the shiny faced Kate Beckinsale and Sandra Bullock, then it's good enough for the rest of us.
Apparently it helps to generate collagen and elastin, which can help to boost the radiance of your face but before you go knocking on the door of the nice South Korean couple up the road with the young son, the treatment involves microneedling which is a beautician repeatedly stabbing you in the face thousands of times to help the baby foreskins sink into your skin in return for £500.
Short of grabbing a handful needles and harvesting baby foreskins from the South Korean Community to wipe across you face in an attempt to look younger, we will just have to wait until Boots make a knock off version or if you really can't wait, dig out the liquidiser and have a word with the local Rabbi at the Synagogue, they should have some laying around, oy vey.
Nothing weird with that at all, it's perfectly normal to want to have the liquidised foreskins of multiple babies rubbed all over your face and if it's good enough for the shiny faced Kate Beckinsale and Sandra Bullock, then it's good enough for the rest of us.
Apparently it helps to generate collagen and elastin, which can help to boost the radiance of your face but before you go knocking on the door of the nice South Korean couple up the road with the young son, the treatment involves microneedling which is a beautician repeatedly stabbing you in the face thousands of times to help the baby foreskins sink into your skin in return for £500.
Short of grabbing a handful needles and harvesting baby foreskins from the South Korean Community to wipe across you face in an attempt to look younger, we will just have to wait until Boots make a knock off version or if you really can't wait, dig out the liquidiser and have a word with the local Rabbi at the Synagogue, they should have some laying around, oy vey.
Tuesday, 16 October 2018
Still Here Against The Odds
Despite the odds it looks as though i'm going to make it to the end of another day but when i look at the odds of death and injury from Liverpool Victoria Insurance, i'm quite impressed i'm still here at all.
I woke up in bed this morning without injuring myself on the mattress or pillow (1:2000) and survived my shower (1:11,469) and even managed to successfully negotiate avoiding emergency treatment after being injured by the jam jar (1:1000).
After not dying by a plunging elevator (1:10 million) i even managed to avoid being killed by a neighbours dog (1:18 million) to drive to work and arrive not dead (1:100) although the odds of dying in a train crash are better (1:500,000) so maybe i'll go by rail from now on just to be safe.
Thanking my lucky stars death by an accident at work (1:40,000) was not an issue and i didn't die in a terror attack (1:20 million) and despite a grey and stormy looking sky, lightning didn't get me (1:10 million), nor an asteroid (1:200,000), a falling aeroplane (1:250,000) or an extra large piece of hail braining me (1:734 million).
Although i am now home i'm still not safe as i still have to negotiate the sofa where i have odds of being killed by my own furniture of 1:20 million but at least i think i am safe of being killed of a shark (1:11 million) or a bear (1:2 million) and as i'm over 150 miles away from a nuclear facility, i like my odds of not going to meet my maker courtesy of a nuclear power accident (1:10 million).
Now all i have to do is safely negotiate the pillow and mattress again and hope that all this new fracking doesn't increase my odds of dying in earthquake (1:148,756) so i can do it all over again tomorrow.
I woke up in bed this morning without injuring myself on the mattress or pillow (1:2000) and survived my shower (1:11,469) and even managed to successfully negotiate avoiding emergency treatment after being injured by the jam jar (1:1000).
After not dying by a plunging elevator (1:10 million) i even managed to avoid being killed by a neighbours dog (1:18 million) to drive to work and arrive not dead (1:100) although the odds of dying in a train crash are better (1:500,000) so maybe i'll go by rail from now on just to be safe.
Thanking my lucky stars death by an accident at work (1:40,000) was not an issue and i didn't die in a terror attack (1:20 million) and despite a grey and stormy looking sky, lightning didn't get me (1:10 million), nor an asteroid (1:200,000), a falling aeroplane (1:250,000) or an extra large piece of hail braining me (1:734 million).
Although i am now home i'm still not safe as i still have to negotiate the sofa where i have odds of being killed by my own furniture of 1:20 million but at least i think i am safe of being killed of a shark (1:11 million) or a bear (1:2 million) and as i'm over 150 miles away from a nuclear facility, i like my odds of not going to meet my maker courtesy of a nuclear power accident (1:10 million).
Now all i have to do is safely negotiate the pillow and mattress again and hope that all this new fracking doesn't increase my odds of dying in earthquake (1:148,756) so i can do it all over again tomorrow.
Sunday, 1 April 2018
203 Candles
If i lived on Mercury my birthday cake would have 203 candles on it today. They would be melted before i got chance to blow them out as temperatures on Mercury reach 427C and Venus is even hotter at an average of 462C but i would only be a very hot and sweaty 79.
The Happy Birthday banners and foil balloon would have a big 26 on it if i lived on Mars but if i grew up on Jupiter i would be 4 and could legitimately eat my ice-cream with my fingers and stick smarties up my nose.
Elsewhere in the Solar System i would be 1 on Saturn and even younger on Uranus and Neptune but the fates decreed that i was born and raised on Earth which has gone around the Sun exactly 49 times since i was dragged screaming into the World.
Today is Easter Sunday and to celebrate the day Jesus invented Easter Eggs or whatever he did, the coffee shop is shut and the regular 0104 Birthday Club is postponed for this year so Happy Returns for the day Chris, Philip, Susan, David and Jimmy and have a great time, don't eat too much chocolate and see you next year unless i'm on Jupiter in which case i'm not old enough to drink Latte's and mine will be a Fanta.
The Happy Birthday banners and foil balloon would have a big 26 on it if i lived on Mars but if i grew up on Jupiter i would be 4 and could legitimately eat my ice-cream with my fingers and stick smarties up my nose.
Elsewhere in the Solar System i would be 1 on Saturn and even younger on Uranus and Neptune but the fates decreed that i was born and raised on Earth which has gone around the Sun exactly 49 times since i was dragged screaming into the World.
Today is Easter Sunday and to celebrate the day Jesus invented Easter Eggs or whatever he did, the coffee shop is shut and the regular 0104 Birthday Club is postponed for this year so Happy Returns for the day Chris, Philip, Susan, David and Jimmy and have a great time, don't eat too much chocolate and see you next year unless i'm on Jupiter in which case i'm not old enough to drink Latte's and mine will be a Fanta.
Sunday, 4 March 2018
Weddings At All Time Low
The Office for National Statistics has revealed that just 239,020 male and female marriages took place in 2015, almost half the number that took place in the previous lowest year of 1940 which when you consider it was wartime in 1940 and vast amounts of men were out the country involved in war things, it makes the statistic look even starker.
The man from the Marriage Foundation isn't a happy bunny about it, pointing out with brilliant hyperbole that it is a disgrace and Britain is languishing in shame at the bottom of the developed world league table for family stability.
I don't know if owned a florist shop selling carnations or maybe he had a job as a wedding photographer but he seemed very ticked off about it and the further revelation that the average newlywed is now 36 years old.
Seems i am in the minority then as i am one of those fast dwindling married people but i can think of two reasons that could put people off.
Firstly, unless you are a massive masochist, the wedding day itself is beyond stressful with so much to plan and arrange and so many people to keep happy while it goes by in a blur of champagne and crying bridesmaids that you do wonder why you didn't just nip off to another country and do a Britney Spears style secret wedding.
Secondly, on top of the stress the average UK wedding costs £33,884 and despite the ranting, the man from the Marriage Foundation won't be chipping in so saving until you are 36 seems about right considering the other grown-up activities such as rent/mortgage and having children.
Although there are some legal complications to common-law relationships, getting married is not essential to a loving relationship so i say unless the Marriage Foundation is going to help organise the flowers and act as usher or make a sizable donation to the day then they can tut all they like about languishing in shame because they're not invited.
The man from the Marriage Foundation isn't a happy bunny about it, pointing out with brilliant hyperbole that it is a disgrace and Britain is languishing in shame at the bottom of the developed world league table for family stability.
I don't know if owned a florist shop selling carnations or maybe he had a job as a wedding photographer but he seemed very ticked off about it and the further revelation that the average newlywed is now 36 years old.
Seems i am in the minority then as i am one of those fast dwindling married people but i can think of two reasons that could put people off.
Firstly, unless you are a massive masochist, the wedding day itself is beyond stressful with so much to plan and arrange and so many people to keep happy while it goes by in a blur of champagne and crying bridesmaids that you do wonder why you didn't just nip off to another country and do a Britney Spears style secret wedding.
Secondly, on top of the stress the average UK wedding costs £33,884 and despite the ranting, the man from the Marriage Foundation won't be chipping in so saving until you are 36 seems about right considering the other grown-up activities such as rent/mortgage and having children.
Although there are some legal complications to common-law relationships, getting married is not essential to a loving relationship so i say unless the Marriage Foundation is going to help organise the flowers and act as usher or make a sizable donation to the day then they can tut all they like about languishing in shame because they're not invited.
Saturday, 3 March 2018
What They Should Teach At School But Don't
The National Curriculum is set by the Government and governs which subjects and standards are used by schools so children learn the same things. It covers what subjects are taught and the standards children should reach in each subject and are meant to set them up for life but there are many subjects that our children should be learnt which would be more useful in life but the students don't find out about until they have left education.
Thinking back to my own experiences, some of the things that i would have benefited from being taught at school were:
Taxes: Taxes are confusing enough with tax codes, rate bands, national insurance, expenses, Self-Assessment or PAYE and personal allowances and even a brief introduction could make paying your taxes a little simpler and help make the whole process smoother because i have spent a small fortune paying someone to do it all for me.
The Imperial System: Quite rightly the metric system ruled in my school and it is quite easy to pick up but once you get out into the World you come across people who continue to use the Imperial System and knowing how many centimetres are in a metre or grams in a kilogramme when you are faced with a carpet salesman asking you how many square feet you need or a market trader how many pounds of potatoes you want can be awkward. I cope by once being told that a standard door is 6ft which is almost 2m so when faced with imagining something 12ft tall for example, i imagine 2 doors on top of each other or 3ft is half a door. It's got me through so far but i always end up with too many or few potatoes as door sizes are no good for buying vegetables.
Cars: Cars can be incredibly unreliable but knowing how to change the oil or replace a spark plug or bulb would not only have saved me time but from paying a greasy man in overalls to charge me an extortionate amount for something that takes minutes to correct.
Computer Maintenance: When i was at school Computers were the domain of the nerds and floppies and Microsoft was the cruel nicknames for any boy who upset us and while i now know my way around Office and Email, being able to repair and maintain my own PC would have said me hundreds of grovelling trips to the IT Team at work when the useless beige box on my desk at home refuses to work properly.
Home Maintenance: Unless you are lucky enough to marry a handyman, at some point your property will need some work done and hiring a carpenter, electrician, or plumber can be an expensive hassle to fix something so small that it takes them longer to drink the strong, sweet cup of tea you made them then to fix the problem.
Self Defence: You never know when you might find yourself alone in an unsafe part of town, and knowing how to defend yourself is definitely a helpful skill to help you out of an unsafe situation when a kick in the assailants plums and running is not an option. You don't need to be trained to black-belt standard just enough to use a few techniques to protect yourself if the worst ever happens.
First Aid: Everyone gets a nosebleed at some point and you will simultaneously be told to hold your head forward, hold it back, pinch your nose, don't pinch your nose or as one person told me, just shove a tissue up your nostrils. The ability to treat a minor wound or injury can be invaluable or at best save getting blood all over your new blouse.
I'm sure there are many more things and we tend to pick them up as we need them as we go through life but knowing Pi or who was the third wife of King Henry VIII isn't going to help you complete your Tax Return or if you are choking on a peanut.
Thinking back to my own experiences, some of the things that i would have benefited from being taught at school were:
Taxes: Taxes are confusing enough with tax codes, rate bands, national insurance, expenses, Self-Assessment or PAYE and personal allowances and even a brief introduction could make paying your taxes a little simpler and help make the whole process smoother because i have spent a small fortune paying someone to do it all for me.
The Imperial System: Quite rightly the metric system ruled in my school and it is quite easy to pick up but once you get out into the World you come across people who continue to use the Imperial System and knowing how many centimetres are in a metre or grams in a kilogramme when you are faced with a carpet salesman asking you how many square feet you need or a market trader how many pounds of potatoes you want can be awkward. I cope by once being told that a standard door is 6ft which is almost 2m so when faced with imagining something 12ft tall for example, i imagine 2 doors on top of each other or 3ft is half a door. It's got me through so far but i always end up with too many or few potatoes as door sizes are no good for buying vegetables.
Cars: Cars can be incredibly unreliable but knowing how to change the oil or replace a spark plug or bulb would not only have saved me time but from paying a greasy man in overalls to charge me an extortionate amount for something that takes minutes to correct.
Computer Maintenance: When i was at school Computers were the domain of the nerds and floppies and Microsoft was the cruel nicknames for any boy who upset us and while i now know my way around Office and Email, being able to repair and maintain my own PC would have said me hundreds of grovelling trips to the IT Team at work when the useless beige box on my desk at home refuses to work properly.
Home Maintenance: Unless you are lucky enough to marry a handyman, at some point your property will need some work done and hiring a carpenter, electrician, or plumber can be an expensive hassle to fix something so small that it takes them longer to drink the strong, sweet cup of tea you made them then to fix the problem.
Self Defence: You never know when you might find yourself alone in an unsafe part of town, and knowing how to defend yourself is definitely a helpful skill to help you out of an unsafe situation when a kick in the assailants plums and running is not an option. You don't need to be trained to black-belt standard just enough to use a few techniques to protect yourself if the worst ever happens.
First Aid: Everyone gets a nosebleed at some point and you will simultaneously be told to hold your head forward, hold it back, pinch your nose, don't pinch your nose or as one person told me, just shove a tissue up your nostrils. The ability to treat a minor wound or injury can be invaluable or at best save getting blood all over your new blouse.
I'm sure there are many more things and we tend to pick them up as we need them as we go through life but knowing Pi or who was the third wife of King Henry VIII isn't going to help you complete your Tax Return or if you are choking on a peanut.
Wednesday, 28 February 2018
Biggest Killers Of Humans
There are many animals that kill humans and in the World Health Organisation list are many of the animals you would expect to see such as sharks who kill on average 6 people a year but that's not as many as Horses who kill on average 20 people annually and Cows who kill 22.
Ants reduce the human population by 30 each year and Bees take care of another 53 while Deer cause 130 deaths but mainly by getting hit by cars and killing the passengers inside.
The King of the Jungle may be target for small penised American dentists but they get their own back by munching down on 250 people which is half the deaths caused annually by Elephants and the same amount caused by Hippopotamuses.
It may be hard to tell the difference between Crocodiles and Alligators but Crocodiles kill 1,000 people each year so it may be worth finding out if that is a croc or a gator waddling your way.
Scorpions send 3,250 people to their maker which is nothing compared to a Tsetse Flies which carries the fatal sleeping sickness and causes 10,000 Deaths.
The Assassin Bug is aptly named as it assassinates 12,000 humans annually and the freshwater snail is near the top of the biggest killer of humans with 20,000 Deaths from ingested the snail which carry parasitic worms.
Dogs are responsible for 35,000 Deaths making it not so much mans best friend but only make it to number 4 in the list with snakes at number 3 with their 200,000 Deaths which is bettered by us humans who kill on average 437,000 other humans a year.
We are only beaten by Mosquitoes who transmit a number of deadly diseases and send on average 725,000 people to the cemetery.
Ants reduce the human population by 30 each year and Bees take care of another 53 while Deer cause 130 deaths but mainly by getting hit by cars and killing the passengers inside.
The King of the Jungle may be target for small penised American dentists but they get their own back by munching down on 250 people which is half the deaths caused annually by Elephants and the same amount caused by Hippopotamuses.
It may be hard to tell the difference between Crocodiles and Alligators but Crocodiles kill 1,000 people each year so it may be worth finding out if that is a croc or a gator waddling your way.
Scorpions send 3,250 people to their maker which is nothing compared to a Tsetse Flies which carries the fatal sleeping sickness and causes 10,000 Deaths.
The Assassin Bug is aptly named as it assassinates 12,000 humans annually and the freshwater snail is near the top of the biggest killer of humans with 20,000 Deaths from ingested the snail which carry parasitic worms.
Dogs are responsible for 35,000 Deaths making it not so much mans best friend but only make it to number 4 in the list with snakes at number 3 with their 200,000 Deaths which is bettered by us humans who kill on average 437,000 other humans a year.
We are only beaten by Mosquitoes who transmit a number of deadly diseases and send on average 725,000 people to the cemetery.
Friday, 2 February 2018
Social Kissing Dilemma
My long held social interaction when saying farewell to someone was always a little upper arm rub while saying something like 'Thank you for the coffee, see you soon, Bye' but things have moved on so far and so fast that before i knew it i was being hugged which was immediately uncomfortable but now cheek kissing is the norm and the social awkwardness that brings.
To pull away when a pair of lips come in search of your cheek is bad form but then the decision is which cheek to go for and the amount of cheeks to kiss.
Some people kiss on one cheek, some two, some go back to the first one for a second time and some go left then right while others go right then left which can lead to the embarrassing moment when noses clash if you get it wrong.
Science has managed to answer party of the quandary as a study by Ruhr University found that in a study of couples kissing, they found that both participants went to their right in 65% of kisses with only 35% leftwards.
If you aim for the other persons left cheek, you will therefore avoid a bruised nose two times out of three but that is only half the conundrum solved as how many cheeks should be kissed and how many times.
The standard seems to be a one kiss on the cheek for someone you know such as a colleague and the two kiss greeting (one on each cheek) for long term friends or someone you know very well.
I still persist with the good old upper arm rub and try to get that in first as i say my goodbyes before any kisses are aimed my way and that works enough of the times but sometimes you can't escape and then you have the dilemma of how quick you can wipe your cheek of the faint coffee smelling film of saliva on your cheek.
Whatever happened to just waving goodbye to people??
To pull away when a pair of lips come in search of your cheek is bad form but then the decision is which cheek to go for and the amount of cheeks to kiss.
Some people kiss on one cheek, some two, some go back to the first one for a second time and some go left then right while others go right then left which can lead to the embarrassing moment when noses clash if you get it wrong.
Science has managed to answer party of the quandary as a study by Ruhr University found that in a study of couples kissing, they found that both participants went to their right in 65% of kisses with only 35% leftwards.
If you aim for the other persons left cheek, you will therefore avoid a bruised nose two times out of three but that is only half the conundrum solved as how many cheeks should be kissed and how many times.
The standard seems to be a one kiss on the cheek for someone you know such as a colleague and the two kiss greeting (one on each cheek) for long term friends or someone you know very well.
I still persist with the good old upper arm rub and try to get that in first as i say my goodbyes before any kisses are aimed my way and that works enough of the times but sometimes you can't escape and then you have the dilemma of how quick you can wipe your cheek of the faint coffee smelling film of saliva on your cheek.
Whatever happened to just waving goodbye to people??
Saturday, 6 May 2017
Revision Tips From Ancient Greece
Exam season is upon us and manic revision is under way and any edge that can be gained is worth considering and researchers may have found a way to eek out those few extra exam points which could make all the difference.
A study found that pupils working in a room with the aroma of rosemary, achieved 5% to 7% better results in memory tests.
According to history books, Ancient Greek students knew this and wore rosemary garlands in exams and in the tests carried out by Northumbria University in a room with and without the aroma of rosemary, students exposed to rosemary had on average an improvement of 5% to 7% in results.
Another often used memory aid is to read difficult or important bits in a funny accent, this makes it stick out in your mind from all the other bits that you are trying to cram into your memory and use mnemonic's for those tricky to remember lists such as 'My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Noodles' for the planets or 'No Plan Like Yours To Study History Wisely' for the Royal
Houses of Norman, Plantagenet, Lancaster, York, Tudor, Stuart, Hanover, Windsor.
Whatever works for you but throw in a few rosemary Josticks when you are learning can't hurt.
A study found that pupils working in a room with the aroma of rosemary, achieved 5% to 7% better results in memory tests.
According to history books, Ancient Greek students knew this and wore rosemary garlands in exams and in the tests carried out by Northumbria University in a room with and without the aroma of rosemary, students exposed to rosemary had on average an improvement of 5% to 7% in results.
Another often used memory aid is to read difficult or important bits in a funny accent, this makes it stick out in your mind from all the other bits that you are trying to cram into your memory and use mnemonic's for those tricky to remember lists such as 'My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Noodles' for the planets or 'No Plan Like Yours To Study History Wisely' for the Royal
Houses of Norman, Plantagenet, Lancaster, York, Tudor, Stuart, Hanover, Windsor.
Whatever works for you but throw in a few rosemary Josticks when you are learning can't hurt.
Wednesday, 3 May 2017
At What Age Should I...
I don't know what age you get to before you start saying 'Age ain't nothing but a number' but science has worked out at what age you should give up the idea of taking up learning Mandarin or when to expect to take delivery of that mid-life crisis sports car.
According to science, the age of 8 is the peak time to learn a new language while we are still able to adapt to a new language structure.
If you are a female between 20 and 23, you are at the peak of attractiveness to the opposite sex, if you are female and 24 or older than those trips to the make-up counter may become a bit more necessary.
Creativity peaks at 25 so if you haven't written that book or painted that picture by your 26th birthday, well you still have four years to make it as a sports star as you are at your peak aged 30 with a mix of experience, tactical nuance and your body can still take the rigours of professional sport before you hit 31 and your muscles wave a little white flag in submission.
That said, you are at your peak for playing chess at 31 and nobody has ever pulled a muscle or strained a ligament moving a knight to F3.
As chess is a game for solitary types, it is the perfect practise for when men wake up on your 35th birthday as that is the age when males are at their loneliest but that passes within 3 years as aged 38 is when we reach peak contentment.
Strangely, six year later at 44 is when we reach peak depression and the classic midlife crisis looms as our declining powers become more noticeable and women buy tight, leather trousers and peroxide our hair and men buy a medallion and undo the top three buttons on their shirts.
Despite our declining chess ability, sagging muscles and rash from cheap gold chained jewellery, the age at which the average Nobel Laureate gets their award is 59 so this is the time to bring peace to the Middle East or revisit that great piece of literature that has been at the back of the drawer since you hit 44 and spent your time flirting embarrassingly with people 20 years your junior.
According to science, the age of 8 is the peak time to learn a new language while we are still able to adapt to a new language structure.
If you are a female between 20 and 23, you are at the peak of attractiveness to the opposite sex, if you are female and 24 or older than those trips to the make-up counter may become a bit more necessary.
Creativity peaks at 25 so if you haven't written that book or painted that picture by your 26th birthday, well you still have four years to make it as a sports star as you are at your peak aged 30 with a mix of experience, tactical nuance and your body can still take the rigours of professional sport before you hit 31 and your muscles wave a little white flag in submission.
That said, you are at your peak for playing chess at 31 and nobody has ever pulled a muscle or strained a ligament moving a knight to F3.
As chess is a game for solitary types, it is the perfect practise for when men wake up on your 35th birthday as that is the age when males are at their loneliest but that passes within 3 years as aged 38 is when we reach peak contentment.
Strangely, six year later at 44 is when we reach peak depression and the classic midlife crisis looms as our declining powers become more noticeable and women buy tight, leather trousers and peroxide our hair and men buy a medallion and undo the top three buttons on their shirts.
Despite our declining chess ability, sagging muscles and rash from cheap gold chained jewellery, the age at which the average Nobel Laureate gets their award is 59 so this is the time to bring peace to the Middle East or revisit that great piece of literature that has been at the back of the drawer since you hit 44 and spent your time flirting embarrassingly with people 20 years your junior.
Friday, 17 March 2017
Tinkering With The Calendar
Ever since we began counting days we seem to have failed to get a full grasp on the calendar, using the path of the moon and adding the odd days here and there before losing ten of them in the 16th Century in an attempt to rewrite the whole calendar and then plonking an extra day on the end of February every four years to try and bring everything back together again.
What we have now is a year of 52 weeks split into months of 4 weeks 3 days, or 4 weeks 2 days one or 4 weeks exactly or 4 weeks and 1 day every four years which seems overly complicated.
Step forward the The International Fixed Calendar which has been gathering dust since it was first proposed in 1902.
I have been thinking about this and it does have some merit but needs a little tweaking.
This other calendar makes a month exactly 4 weeks or 28 days long and then tags on another month and have 13 months in a year.
What about the leap year i hear you ask but here is where it needs tweaking. Under my system the year would be 364 days long so to stop us falling out of sync with a planet taking 365.25 to complete a full lap of the Sun, we keep the leap year every four years to take care of the 4 x .25's and each year we have a non-day day, like an extra bank holiday so a day which just doesn't count.
It makes sense to me to make it New Years Day and start the year with the 1st January the following day, it already has a name and it is already a Bank Holiday so no messing about with when to slide the extra free day in.
The downside is that with a 4 week, 30 day month, some well known dates will get shifted around so for example my birthday is 1 April which under the proper calendar is Day 91 but under the new system Day 91 would become April 7th or Christmas Day which is Day 359 would become 23rd of the newly named month and New Years Eve the 28th of the new month.
Every first would always be a Monday, every 28th would be a Sunday and every payday would always be a Friday and the 8/9, 14/15 and 21/22 of each month would be a weekend.
I'm sure there is something i have overlooked but to save any more tinkering with the calendar, perhaps one big tinkle to make each week 7 days long, each month 4 weeks, slide in an extra month to make a year 13 months long with 364 'real' days in the year and a 'free day' thrown in where we get a breather before doing it all over again.
I'm sure calendar makers may kick up a bit but they would be drowned out by all those people born on 29th February who will now have a day of their own to celebrate on each year, March 4th.
What we have now is a year of 52 weeks split into months of 4 weeks 3 days, or 4 weeks 2 days one or 4 weeks exactly or 4 weeks and 1 day every four years which seems overly complicated.
Step forward the The International Fixed Calendar which has been gathering dust since it was first proposed in 1902.
I have been thinking about this and it does have some merit but needs a little tweaking.
This other calendar makes a month exactly 4 weeks or 28 days long and then tags on another month and have 13 months in a year.
What about the leap year i hear you ask but here is where it needs tweaking. Under my system the year would be 364 days long so to stop us falling out of sync with a planet taking 365.25 to complete a full lap of the Sun, we keep the leap year every four years to take care of the 4 x .25's and each year we have a non-day day, like an extra bank holiday so a day which just doesn't count.
It makes sense to me to make it New Years Day and start the year with the 1st January the following day, it already has a name and it is already a Bank Holiday so no messing about with when to slide the extra free day in.
The downside is that with a 4 week, 30 day month, some well known dates will get shifted around so for example my birthday is 1 April which under the proper calendar is Day 91 but under the new system Day 91 would become April 7th or Christmas Day which is Day 359 would become 23rd of the newly named month and New Years Eve the 28th of the new month.
Every first would always be a Monday, every 28th would be a Sunday and every payday would always be a Friday and the 8/9, 14/15 and 21/22 of each month would be a weekend.
I'm sure there is something i have overlooked but to save any more tinkering with the calendar, perhaps one big tinkle to make each week 7 days long, each month 4 weeks, slide in an extra month to make a year 13 months long with 364 'real' days in the year and a 'free day' thrown in where we get a breather before doing it all over again.
I'm sure calendar makers may kick up a bit but they would be drowned out by all those people born on 29th February who will now have a day of their own to celebrate on each year, March 4th.
Sunday, 5 March 2017
Meaning Of Life & Other Unanswerable Questions Answered
Maths has always been my strong point, 75% of the time i can deal with most things mathematical but the other third i have to throw my hands up and just admit that i don't know the answer. There is no disgrace in saying that you don't know the answer to a question but even the Internet sometimes comes up empty handed which is why Ask Jeeves has a list of questions that it deems 'unanswerable'.
The list includes the most unanswerable questions amongst the 16 million a month it gets asked with the top enquiry being 'What is the meaning of life?' followed by 'is there a God?'
I think i can say to Jeeves, 'Leave this to me, i'll take this one' and have a go at answering them so first up is the elusive 'What is the meaning of life?'.
Hmmm..lets see now, the meaning of life is to go from the cradle to the grave being the best possible person that you can be, to do the best you can for yourself and others and when your life ends, knowing that during your allotted time on the Earth you made at least one persons life better for you being here.
Next up is 'Is there a God?. Simple answer is no, the 'God' as we know him today was created from a mix of other religious stories around at the time and they were all based on a mix of other stories at their creation so if there is a real God, then he would be the one of the earliest civilisation, the Sumerians, and their God was called An who would sit in judgement on humans and from who all the other religions branched out from, taking bits of pieces of each previous 'God' story that went before them as they began their own.
What is the best way to lose weight? is the next unanswerable question but simply put if you take in more calories then you expend, then the excess is stored as fat and fat makes you heavier. The best way to lose weight then is to use up more calories each day then you take in so the body uses it's fat stores and you lose weight.
Is there anybody out there? Consider how our own Solar system has eight planets and our solar system is just one of tens of billions in our own Milky Way galaxy and there are tens of billions of other galaxies each containing billions of stars each.
That's an extraordinary amount of planets orbiting those billions and billions of stars and potential homes of other forms of life so the odds of there not being other life out there on any of those other planets must be minuscule and it happened here so why not on any of those billions multiplied by billions of other solar systems?
Working through, the next unanswerable question is 'Who is the most famous person in the world?' This is tricky but using the dictionary definition of the word 'famous' which is: 'know by many people', it would be hard to find someone who doesn't know the name Adolf Hitler. Jesus would be another choice but that potentially opens the doors for fictional characters so i'm going to plump for Adolf.
What is the secret to happiness? Another tough one but being with others who make you smile and make you feel good, accept that the bad things are there to make the good things feel even better, do things that make you and other people happy and never give yourself an opportunity to say 'I wish i had done that', just do it.
Finally, how long will I live? is the last unanswerable question and this one really is unanswerable, you could be the healthiest person on the planet but that won't matter a jot if a bolt of lightning strikes you on the way to the shops this afternoon so the best answer is potentially tomorrow so don't waste today.
There you go Jeeves, all the unanswerable questions now answered.
Sunday, 4 December 2016
Trusted Professions 2016
Nurses and doctors are the most trusted profession while Government ministers, estate agents and journalists remain at the bottom of the Trust league according to the Ipsos Mori 2016 Veracity Index which annually assesses which roles are most trusted by the public.
Politicians are trusted by just 15% of people with journalists standing at 24% trusted while at the other end 93% of people trust a nurse.
69% trust the clergy, police get 71% while hairdressers score 68% which is higher than economists and central bankers who have the trust of 48% of people and to honest asking financial advice from the lady who puts in your highlights is a safer bet if the state of the economy is anything to go by.
That said, i wouldn't trust Boris Johnson with a trip to the canteen to buy me a sandwich but we made him Foreign Secretary which explains where we may be going wrong.
Politicians are trusted by just 15% of people with journalists standing at 24% trusted while at the other end 93% of people trust a nurse.
69% trust the clergy, police get 71% while hairdressers score 68% which is higher than economists and central bankers who have the trust of 48% of people and to honest asking financial advice from the lady who puts in your highlights is a safer bet if the state of the economy is anything to go by.
That said, i wouldn't trust Boris Johnson with a trip to the canteen to buy me a sandwich but we made him Foreign Secretary which explains where we may be going wrong.
Tuesday, 29 November 2016
The ■■■■■■■ Law
Britain’s intelligence services have been given the most privacy-invading mass surveillance powers in the world after the Investigatory Powers Act became law today.
The legislation, dubbed the ‘snooper’s charter,’ authorizes the ■■■■■■■ to hack into devices, networks computers and ■■■■■■■ which allows for large databases of personal information on UK citizens to be maintained and ■■■■■■■.
Internet, ■■■■■■■ and phone companies can be forced to allow authorities to access to our records on demand and ■■■■■■■ with ■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■.
That data could be anything from ■■■■■■■, internet search history, calls made and text messages sent, and will be available to a wide range of Government agencies such as ■■■■■■■, ■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■.
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has hailed the legislation as 'world-leading' saying it provides ' substantial privacy protection'.
The Home Office says the new law allows the police, security and intelligence agencies to gather and access electronic communications.
Civil liberties group Liberty said '■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ which will ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■'.
It is a sad day when ■■■■■■■ has control over ■■■■■■■ and can use it to ■■■■■■■ or even ■■■■■■■, the ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■'s.
The legislation, dubbed the ‘snooper’s charter,’ authorizes the ■■■■■■■ to hack into devices, networks computers and ■■■■■■■ which allows for large databases of personal information on UK citizens to be maintained and ■■■■■■■.
Internet, ■■■■■■■ and phone companies can be forced to allow authorities to access to our records on demand and ■■■■■■■ with ■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■.
That data could be anything from ■■■■■■■, internet search history, calls made and text messages sent, and will be available to a wide range of Government agencies such as ■■■■■■■, ■■■■■■■ and ■■■■■■■.
Home Secretary Amber Rudd has hailed the legislation as 'world-leading' saying it provides ' substantial privacy protection'.
The Home Office says the new law allows the police, security and intelligence agencies to gather and access electronic communications.
Civil liberties group Liberty said '■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■ which will ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■'.
It is a sad day when ■■■■■■■ has control over ■■■■■■■ and can use it to ■■■■■■■ or even ■■■■■■■, the ■■■■■■■ ■■■■■■■'s.
Wednesday, 2 November 2016
Officially Great
Donald Trump cap may say he wants to make his country 'Great Again' and we may have the word Great in our name but the UK or USA neither are considered 'the greatest country in the World' according to a poll from US News & World Report in collaboration with the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School and BAV Consulting.
Canada is officially the second greatest with the UK third and the USA fourth but top banana is Germany in the poll which assessed countries according to quality of life, entrepreneurship, cultural influence, economic and developmental indicators.
So if Germany and Canada are at the top, where is whatever the opposite word for greatest is?
Step up Algeria followed by Ukraine, Iran, Nigeria and Pakistan who make up the bottom places and are officially not great and are in dire need of someone wearing a 'Make Great Again' baseball cap.
Canada is officially the second greatest with the UK third and the USA fourth but top banana is Germany in the poll which assessed countries according to quality of life, entrepreneurship, cultural influence, economic and developmental indicators.
So if Germany and Canada are at the top, where is whatever the opposite word for greatest is?
Step up Algeria followed by Ukraine, Iran, Nigeria and Pakistan who make up the bottom places and are officially not great and are in dire need of someone wearing a 'Make Great Again' baseball cap.
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