A Medical Miracle

I have been feeling a bit dizzy recently so reached out to the Internet and found a few medical websites to read what i wanted to read and then idly clicked a link and began to read about Typhoid Fever. Before i had even finished the list of symptoms i realised that i had got it.
I sat for a while, frozen with horror and then, in the listlessness of despair, i clicked the next link
which was St Vitus Dance, again read the symptoms and discovered that I had that also and must have had it for months without knowing it.
Wondering what else I was suffering from, i found the index and starting alphabetically, read up on Ague, and learned that I was sickening for it, and was in the early stages of Bright’s disease although i was relieved to find i only had it in a mild form.
Cholera I had and also Diphtheria while Epidermolysis Bullosa‎ i seemed to have been born with.  I plodded conscientiously through the twenty-six letters, learning i had everything from Acute Valley Fever to Zymosis and as there were no more diseases after Zymosis, i concluded there was nothing else the matter with me.
I felt my pulse and after not finding it after several minutes concluded that it had obviously stopped beating at some point during the day.   
I stuck out my tongue as far as it would go and looked in the bathroom mirror and all i could gain from that was to feel more certain than before that I had Scarlet Fever.
With so many problems i feel the only reason i am still going is due to all the diseases keeping each other in balance so as a semi-living medical miracle i have donated myself to medical science for a while so the blogging may slow down until medical science finds a cure for my plethora of ailments.