Can I Smell Burning?

It was lucky that the Devil went down to Georgia to play in a fiddle contest because if he come to the UK over the last few days after 15 mins he would have gone sod this, its too hot and buggered off back to Hades because it has been cooking eggs on a car bonnet hot.
As the owner of a skin so pale it is almost transparent, i always take care to avoid sunburn but every year i get caught out and this year was no exception, after popping outside for a quick pull on the vape mid afternoon and as it was only a quick pop, not bothering with any protection, i ended up spending 20 mins outside yakking during the hottest part of the day and came back in with a face and shoulders the colour of Santa's suit.
Happens every year and it is about this point in the season when i have been stung or bitten several times and have to smell of after-sun for the next week and avoid wearing anything that touches the affected areas, i think Summer can bugger off now and pine for the cold of Winter.
I was told a while ago that Sun-Cream is not as effective as staying covered up as it doesn't completely block the sun as well as a cotton blouse or a pair of trousers and if i do wear sun cream, don't pat the extra for Factor 50 as it is only fractionally better than Factor 30.
Many people don't understand what the  Factor 30/50 means and i want sure so i Googled it and found it means that Factor 30 allows you to spend 30 times longer in the Sun than if you were not wearing anything.
The caveat to that is knowing how long you can spend in the Sun before you burn to start with, if it's 10 mins than you get 300 minutes of frolicking in the Sun before toasting  (10 mins x 30) or if you burn at 20 mins, you get 600 mins (20 mins x 30). If like me your skin burns the second a sun ray hits you then get about 30 seconds but to be complicated about it, the time is adjusted by the time of day so the above maths is just a rough guide across the day and between 10am and 5pm you will get burnt quicker and therefore have a shorter time than outside of these times.  
The answer than is to stay covered, try to avoid direct sunlight between 10am and 4pm if possible and if not apply sun cream and do the maths as above for your skin type but most importantly, if you pop outside for a quick vape in the heat of the midday sun, don't spend too long gassing about the Women's Euro's.