Special Guest Blogger: Chinese Goddess Lady Q

Few people outside of China know that China had toilet paper and flushing loos while the rest of you were still wiping yourselves with leaves. Of course, only the Emperor could afford such luxury. Ordinary peasants had to make do with holes in the ground. Little has changed in that respect in some regions, but the government are working on it.
I was the Goddess of toilets but i also dabbled in Outhouses, WC's, Lavatories, Restrooms, Closets and Washrooms and most Chinese toilets are haunted by a Toilet Goddess who were generally mortal ladies who have suffered some terrible toilet-related misfortune and been defined as a result and go on to make strange spooky noises which has even the most stout-hearted visitor crossing their legs and waiting till they got home.
My story of becoming a toilet ghost goes that I was the mistress of Emperor Gaozu who was the first Emperor of the Han Dynasty. It was one big unhappy family as the Emperor’s official wife Lü Zhi, was insanely jealous and did not like me one bit and when the Emperor died, she stripped away my official title and several of my external body parts but it gets worse.
She grabbed what was left of me and hauled me off and threw her into the dirtiest, smelliest, ugliest, foulest latrine in the whole of China and invited my son as well as the new Emperor and all his ministers of state to come and see me .
The sight of his dead mother traumatised him so much that he totally lost the will to live and spent the rest of his life eating cake and getting fat but I was made a Goddess and now spend eternity watching people in the toilet and reminding them to wash their hands.