Special Guest Blogger: Geoff Capes

As you're reading this, I’m obviously dead.
I'm Geoff Capes. Yes, that Geoff Capes, the bloke who once lifted a small car like it was a bar of chocolate, won two World’s Strongest Man titles, and taught an entire nation that yes, fat blokes can run, well sort of.
Now, as I lie here reflecting on my legacy, I must say: it’s been a bumpy ride. Like a sack of spuds on a lorry. But a glorious one.
Let’s be honest, I wasn’t born strong. I was born large, weighing 12.4 pounds (5.6 kg) at birth. In my case, strength came as a welcome bonus to sheer mass. If the Olympics had a category for Men Who Take Up Two Seats on Trains, I’d have won gold, silver, and bronze just to be thorough but i had to make do with the two times Commonwealth champion, twice European indoor champion, competed at three Olympic Games and holding the British record for the shot putt.
Not many people know that before I started lifting cars, I was a proper athlete but then I got dropped so I moved on. Into strongman.
But back in the day, back when mullets were fashionable and trousers had elastic waists,I discovered something miraculous: I could lift things. Not just things. Heavy things. Cars, fridges, And people actually paid me to do it. Mad, that.
My finest hour? Winning World’s Strongest Man. Twice. In 1983 and 1985.
There was a time when I could carry an anvil uphill while being pelted with snowballs in Finland but at the end I struggled to carry my own body weight from the sofa to the fridge and i settled to a lifestyle of breeding budgerigars and goddamn it I was good at that to, becoming a European and World champion with my Recessive Pieds.
Being a hefty 27 stone does has an effect on the body and my heart said stuff lugging all this around and packed in but I gave Britain something to cheer for. Not in football. Good Lord, not in football. But in strength. I made people believe that a man with a paunch, a perm, and questionable fashion sense could still rise to the top.

Cannabis Is Not A Safe Drug

According to experts at the UK Border Force, seizures of Cannabis in the 90s contained approximately 4% tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), the psychoactive ingredient which produces the high while today the average THC level of seizures is at least four times higher at 16%.
You can generally tell a long term cannabis smoker because their brains are just that little bit slower, a fraction of a second to react and my own back of a fag packet reading is  backed by the overwhelming evidence from mental health professionals that smoking cannabis, particularly in your teenage years, there is a risk of mental health problems.
Cannabis was always considered a soft drug, far less dangerous than hard drugs like heroin and cocaine but even back then i remember talking to Mental Health staff who said that the reputation of cannabis as harmless was just plain wrong.
I have a lot of time for the leader of the Green Party, Zack Polanski, but his call to legalise cannabis which he states he has never tried, is just all kinds of ignorance.
A psychiatrist leading an early intervention in psychosis team at the Institute of Psychiatry in London, said that studies show that 'if the risk of schizophrenia for the general population is about 1%, the evidence is that, if you take ordinary cannabis, it quadruples to 4% and if you smoke the strongest strain (above 10% THC), you push it up to 8%'.
Data from 11 countries in Europe found that regular users of cannabis containing 10% THC were five times more likely than non-users to develop psychosis and severe mental damage in cannabis-consuming teenagers whose brains are still developing, were 11 times more likely to suffer a psychosis than non-users. In Denmark, researchers estimated that of male patients between 21 and 30 who suffered from schizophrenia, up to 30% of the cases were due to cannabis use.
The evidence for the cannabis-psychosis connection is now as strong that to call for making Cannabis legal and more freely available is downright dangerous and foolhardy.
as  the legalisation of cannabis legitimises it and sends a message that the government views it as relatively harmless whereas the message should be that cannabis can send you insane.

Brit Humour

 

How funny is this??? Visitors to the London Subway were greeted by the above poster to try and entice people to Visit America.
In the first picture is a smiling Donald Trump and his best buddy the pedophile Jeffrey Epstein with a young girl.
In the second is Americans in Trump red hats carrying burning crosses.
In the third is a young buy in a school holding a gun surrounded by dead classmates and in the fourth smiling ICE officials carrying away a young girl.
So a pedophile president, racists, school massacres and incarcerating kids and non-whites are what the pictures show and to be honest, is exactly how people outside of America see this current rabble.
British sense of humour, love it.

Special Guest Blogger: Alex Salmond

Greetings, I’m Alex Salmond, former First Minister of Scotland.
Let me start by saying, growing up in Aberdeen taught me anything it was that that the North Sea can throw a decent tantrum.
My political awakening? That came during a heated debate over whether Scotland should be allowed to keep the oil. Spoiler: We were.
I joined the SNP because, frankly, I couldn’t stand the alternative: a lifetime of Tory or Labour and it was me who fought for the abolition of university tuition fees and the scrapping of prescription charges, you are welcome Scotland.
Ah yes, 2014. The summer of white stags, white Bens, and white-knuckled negotiations. Running the independence campaign was like herding Highland cows with a map written in Gaelic. But we nailed it. I mean, 55% said nay, but really it was a moral if not actual victory.
Highlights? Oh, where to begin. The debates where I schooled the lot of them with the precision of a man who’d spent decades practising how to say 'Westminster' with the disdain of a cat who’s just been forced into a bath. The media coverage, which treated Scotland’s political future like a particularly dramatic soap opera. And let’s not forget the night of the result, when I donned my kilt.
Then came Brexit, the political equivalent of a rogue wave. Suddenly, Scotland was the only place in the EU that couldn’t decide if it wanted to be there. I retired from politics in 2017, not because I’d seen enough, but because I’d seen too much. The SNP? They elected Nicola Sturgeon as my successor, which was a bit like choosing your most brilliant, no-nonsense cousin to take over the family estate. She’s done wonders.
I hope they remember the Independence fight and the oil and not the the 14 offences, including attempted rape and sexual assault because i was found not guilty and nor the Russia Today Show i fronted for several years and certainly not how i died of a heart attack while reaching over for a bottle of tomato ketchup while at a banquet in North Macedonia.

Nothing New Under The Sun

There was no Social Media in the 17th Century but what they did have was the Printing Press which caused a very Social Media like fuss when the cost of printing reduced so much that anyone could print anything, and they did in the form pf pamphlets.
The sudden explosion of cheap print unleashed a tidal wave of inexpensive pamphlets that could be produced and distributed with unprecedented speed. Before this surge, most information flowed through relatively narrow channels but suddenly, anyone with modest resources could circulate opinions in the streets.
This led to what historians describe as pamphlet wars, in which anyone with a beef weaponised print to attack their enemies, circulate conspiracy theories, and harden ideological lines. The tone of many pamphlets was and filled with character assassinations and exaggerated claims designed to inflame readers.
Authorities were so alarmed by the loss of their narrative control that Parliament passed measures such as the Licensing Order of 1643 in an attempt to suppress 'scandalous and unlicensed printing'.
Today the British Government are attempting their own version of the Licensing Act to suppress scandalous and unlicensed digital messages, especially those aimed at our children so confirming that old proverb that nothing is new under the Sun meaning events today are merely repetitions of what occurred before, only now with Mobile Phones rather than a more unwieldy Printing Press.

Gissa Job

As a young lass of 16 i walked into a career of Journalism and 40 years later i am still doing it so with 11 working years left i often think i would like to try my hand at something else before i hang up my notepad and start complaining about my state pension but looking around i didn't see much to entice me away from my office desk optimally positioned next to the kitchen.
According to new research from the business financial platform Tide, British job applicants are missing out on lucrative tech sector careers because they don’t understand the roles, even after it has been explained to them but i was intrigued by the advert i saw for an Empathy Engineer in the Tech sector.
£110k a year and all it called for was experience in being a proactive disruptor with excellent communications skills and a world-class library of proven frameworks.
'Dear Sir/Madam' i emailed, 'I am interested in your Advertisement for an Empathy Engineer so please forward details of what the post entails' and the reply was 'someone who considers the social, cultural and emotional factors that influence how society interacts with technology, and focuses on blending the human perspective with tech-driven problem-solving'.
'Thank you' i replied, 'What exactly does that entail?' and the reply came 'Implementing game mechanics, narratives and experiences that foster empathy, emotional intelligence and social awareness among players, promoting meaningful connections and understanding within virtual worlds'.
Unfortunately I missed out on that one which i was gutted about but there was also an advert for a belonging manager at the same company.
'Dear Sir/Madam' i emailed, 'I am interested in your Advertisement for a Belonging Manager so please forward details of what the post entails' and the reply came 'The role of a belonging manager is to embed an inclusive culture at the heart of the organisation, ensuring employees feel valued, included and heard'.
Ah ok, think I will stick to Journalism for the moment if it's all the same. 

Immigrant Ratcliffe Bemoaning Immigrants

Manchester United owner Jim Ratcliffe is one of those special types of patriots, the type that would do anything for his country except live of pay taxes in it.
Overlooking that his squad is made up of 75% non English born players, the businessman who urged people to vote for Brexit and then naffed off to Monaco once it turned into a car crash, has been spouting off about how Britain is being colonised by immigrants.
He backed up his assertion by quoting completely wrong figures and explained that immigrants cost the UK too much money although it must have slipped his mind when he went begging the Government for £125 million to pay for funding his business Ineos or the £2 billion Wembley of the North stadium project despite having £17.5 billion shoved away in his off shore bank account.
While the usual right wing dullards such as Nigel Farage have of course applauded the United co-owner’s ‘straight-talking’ it has not gone down so well in less racist circles. The UK prime minister, the Greater Manchester mayor and assorted United fan groups have been among many, many folk to condemn his deranged comments about and making a point of pointing out the hypocrisy given his own immigrant status as a tax-dodging resident of a Mediterranean principality.
Keir Starmer took a break from fighting to save his own job and barked that Ratcliffe should apologise but it was more likely the FA assessment into whether Ratcliffe has brought the game into disrepute and banned from Old Trafford that forced him to weasel the non-apology apology that he was sorry if his choice of words offended anyone.
Obviously, only sorry that Britain is not as enlightened as him for being appalled by his terrible, far right-wing views.

Special Guest Blogger: Steve Wright

Hello, Posse. Or should I say, the Celestial Posse? It’s your old mate Steve, filing what you might call my final show report. No need to adjust your screen, you’re not dead. Well, I mean, we’re all dying slowly from the moment we’re born, aren’t we? Cheery thought, that. But I’m the one who’s already popped his clogs, shuffled off this mortal coil, handed in his P45.
The big switch-off itself, you ask? Very peaceful. Very dignified. Was listening to a bit of Barry White, getting ready to make a cup of tea, and then… unexpected technical difficulties at The Steve Wright Experience. The big transmitter in the sky just decided to, well, stop transmitting. One minute I was wondering if I had enough Hobnobs, the next I was floating past the pearly gates being asked for my reference number. Turns out it was the same one as my BBC staff pass. Typical. Efficient, the big man upstairs. Loves a good bit of bureaucracy.
I’m told I left behind a ‘legacy’. Honestly? I just that I made your drive home from work a bit less rubbish.
I hope my legacy is that time I played a ridiculous record you hadn’t heard since you were 14, and you sang along at the top of your voice, badly, in traffic. I hope it’s that I made you snort at a ‘Fascinating Fact’ about a man from Swindon who could balance a fridge on his chin. I hope it’s that for three hours every weekday, I was the daft, slightly saucy friend in the passenger seat, pointing out the absurdities of it all.
That was the secret, wasn't it? It was all a bit of a laugh. The show, the ‘Posse’, the ridiculous characters like Mr. Angry from Purley, lazy Sid the Manager and Gervais the Hairdresser… it was all born from the simple idea that life is often bananas, so we might as well join in.
We spent years in a tiny studio, playing records and talking nonsense. And for some reason, you lovely lot tuned in. Millions of you. I still can't quite get my head around it and the Best DJ of the Year was a great moment although voters probably thought I was someone else and not silly old Steve from Greenwich, him from Thames Valley Radio then Radio Luxembourg before landing at the BBC with a face perfect for radio (there was a reason why i didn't present that many Top Of The Pops) and a profound fondness for a decent biscuit.
You know, they have ‘Fascinating Facts’ here, too like did you know that when you here they don’t judge you on your good deeds or your sins? They judge you on your karaoke song choice. If you picked ‘Angels’ by Robbie Williams, you’re fast-tracked. If you chose ‘Agadoo’, you have to sit in a corner and think about what you’ve done.
So, legacy? Somewhere, a car is stuck in a jam on the M25. And the person inside is probably having a terrible day. And I hope, I really, really hope, they’ve got the radio on. And I hope it’s playing something that makes them tap their fingers on the steering wheel. Something brilliant. Something silly. Something that, just for a moment, makes everything feel okay.
After dying from a ruptured stomach ulcer, it was time to fade this old jingle out so to finish my famous line that i wish my first word was 'quote, so when i die my last could be unquote so thank you for everything...unquote.

I'm With The Kids

The ITV Peston Show runs a Youth Tracker which polls 18-25 year olds and the latest poll has some interesting results with 86% saying they would rejoin the EU.
The 2016 means that all of those polled would not have been old enough to vote at the time but they are ones who face the future outside of the European Union, and they can obviously see what a car crash it has been thanks to the 52% who either listen to the warnings or just didn't care and will continue to be until someone has the nuts to hold another referendum.
This generation never asked for Brexit, yet it affects them the most so there is hope that at some point, and hopefully not i the far flung future, we can reverse the calamity of Brexit although there are some deluded souls who are still pretending that the future will be brighter outside of the EU who obviously haven't been paying attention.   
The Poll also found that they think Jeremy Corbyn would be a better Labour leader than Keir Starmer and i would heartily agree if that ship hadn't already sailed and Corbyn was now in a separate left wing Party.
More good news is that almost 60% say they would never vote Conservative and the big winner with that age group is Zack Polanski, the leader of the Green Party.
I think the Kids are alright, we just need them to progress into politics and we can put the downright awful years of the Conservatives and Keir Starmer behind us.

Next Step In Forcing Governments To Fight Climate Change

In the 80s and 90s the environmental call was to make people aware what was coming if we didn't change our ways but i was always optimistic that once people realised the trouble we're in they would do whatever they possibly could to mitigate climate change.
I imagined it would be universal and Global Governments would all work together in a similar way to how they did in the late 1980s to protect the Earth's ozone layer by phasing out ozone-depleting substances emitted by human activities.
Here we are now in the 2020's and its getting hotter thanks to man made climate change where in the 1980's CO2 where 338-339 parts per million (ppm), they have continued grow to over 422 ppm today and actually increased from roughly 1.6 ppm per year in the 1980s to over 2.6 ppm per year in the last decade.
Climate scientists are saying that the current Australian heatwave with the heat reaching record-breaking temperatures of close to 50C, was five times more likely to occur thanks to man made Climate Change so weather warnings get louder, weather maps get redder yet they are somehow ignored.
We can take action individually but to make wholesale change it is going to take work at the Government level so what will it take for the dishonest, greedy and selfish politicians who continue to accept donations from fossil fuel companies, and therefore put their interests above its citizens?
It is unlikely that even whole cities burning or a planet wide drought causing a series of weather-related crop failures will focus minds because the 2.5 million annual deaths from air pollution, over 546,000 yearly deaths from heat exposure and 154,000 from wildfire smoke are not causing pause for thought so maybe we should start holding our governments to account for the scale and the climate related deaths.
Surely that is the next step, for families who have lost loved ones in the increasing number of fires, extreme hot heat, floods and other climate change induced disasters, to start suing the politicians who keep green washing their policies, approving new fossil fuel projects and continuing policies that add to the emissions that cause climate change, instead of doing everything that they can possibly do to introduce policies to cut emissions and fight climate change.   
If the laws we currently have cannot make people responsible, perhaps we need new laws. And if our politicians won't legislate them, perhaps we need different politicians.