Thursday, 17 May 2018

Royal Weddings Not Like They Used To Be

For some, this Saturday will be spent preparing for street parties, wearing the union jack as a cape and hoping that the weather stays fine but i will be doing everything humanly possible to avoid the Royal Wedding this weekend but it has to be marked somehow so i will post about a Royal Wedding, the one between Prince Prince Amadeo of Italy and Italian noblewoman Maria Vittoria dal Pozzo in 1867.

The happy day didn't start too well when the Maria’s mistress of the wardrobe took her own life by hanging herself just before the ceremony.
On the way to the wedding the officer leading the procession fell from his horse after suffering sunstroke and when they arrived at the Palace the gates were locked and the search for the gatekeeper ended with him being found lying in a pool of blood.
The delayed wedding finally went ahead but in a glorious piece of inept handling of his ceremonial weapon, the best man accidentally shot himself in the head during the ceremony.
Eventually the bride and groom were escorted by a procession of carriages to the railway station where the royal newlyweds were to board a train for their honeymoon but the officer who had drawn up the marriage contract suffered a stroke and the nervous stationmaster fell under the wheels of the approaching bridal locomotive.
Finally the King decided that after everything that had happened, it would be an accident waiting to happen to let his son and new daughter-in-law to board the train so ordered everyone back to the safety of the Palace but in keeping with the day, riding alongside the bridal carriage, the count of Castiglione fell from his horse underneath the carriage’s wheels and died when the weight of the wheels drove a medal pinned to his chest through his heart.
In the best tradition of Royals Wedding, they all lived happily ever after or at least until Maria contracted Tuberculosis and died nine years later aged just 29.
Good luck to Megan and Harry but you might want to rethink that ceremonial weapon for William.

1 comment:

Q said...
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