To anyone else, if you find an extreme political group actively agreeing with your idea's then you may want to take a step back and reconsider if you want to be associated with such awful people but no such qualms for Suella Braverman whose inane chuntering around the failure of multiculturalism and how being discriminated against for being gay or female is enough to gain you asylum in Britain have been thoroughly endorsed by the extreme right wing groups currently polluting the UK and using up air which could otherwise be used by less abhorrent people.
LBC's Iain Dale, a man who put himself right of center, had an interesting thought last night on his show that it is no coincidence that the last three Home Secretaries, Sajid Javid, Priti Patel and Suella Braverman (we can't count Grant Schapps as he was only there for 5 days) have been children of immigrants themselves and all have said awful things which would seem them charged with racism if a white person said them, but because they are castigating the very people they themselves once were, they can get away with it.
Priti Patel was arrogant enough to proudly admit that her parents, and therefore her, would not have made it into the country under the rules she herself introduced as Home Secretary and as Dale noted in a nod towards the saying about women, if you are not a white Brit then you have to be seen to be even more
anti-immigrant to be considered half as anti-immigrant and he could have a point.
In recent times, the Conservatives have moved so far to the right that they were sharing the same space in the Brexit debate's as Nigel Farage's UKIP who David Cameron himself described as fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists and now are espousing an immigration and multiculturalism policy which is endorsed by groups like the BNP and other extreme, violent right wings groups who will obviously take the tacit approval of the Government to cause violence and protests against immigrants and non-whites.
We may not yet be in the same circle as the fascists of the 1930's era but in the Venn diagram of right wing abominations we are certainly overlapping.
Saturday 30 September 2023
The Right Wing Venn Diagram
Today Is...International Translation Day
Exodus 31:15 'For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall be surely put
Leviticus 20:9 'Whosoever doeth any work in the Sabbath day, he shall surely be
Deuteronomy 22:20 'If on her engagement, evidence of a young woman’s virginity is not found, then the men of her town shall
Deuteronomy 21:18 'If someone has a stubborn and rebellious son then all the men of the town shall
Deuteronomy 17:2-5 'If those among you hath gone and worshipped other gods, they shalt
Exodus 22: 18 'Thou shalt not suffer a witch to
Deuteronomy 22:23-25 'Girls who are Raped within the City Limits, you shall
Leviticus 24:16 'He that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be
Deuteronomy 12:6 'If anyone entices you 'Let us go worship other gods' . . . you shall surely
Leviticus 20:13 'If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, they shall surely be
Leviticus 20: 10-12 'The man that committeth adultery with another man’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be
Leviticus 20:15 'If a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be
It seems that the Bible isn't all about killing people for their sins after all, it was all a mistake in the translation.
Friday 29 September 2023
Women's Footballer ACL Tsunami
To a footballer an Anterior Cruciate Ligament (ACL) injury can be career ending and over the past 12 months women footballer seem to be particularly affected with high profile players Leah Williamson, Emma Watson, Beth Meade and Vivianne Miedema suffering the injury in the past few months and
Scotland midfielder Caroline Weir rupturing her anterior cruciate ligament playing for her country on Tuesday.
Knee Surgeon Nev Davies has said that there had been a tsunami of cases in the women's game at all levels and women are up to six times more likely to have an ACL injury than male counterparts and research shows that there is a link between menstrual cycles and ACL injuries in women's football.
Biologists point to protein synthesis and degradation where Estrogen in the Ligament tissue alter's its mechanical properties, degrading and weakening the tissue leading to a more likely rupture and it being weakest during the menstrual cycle, particularly Day 1 and 2.
On the eve of the Women's Super League kicking off, a report by the Athletic Medical Journey found that of 37 female athletes with recent ACL injuries who participated in the study, 26 were either menstruating or had just stopped at the time of the injury and had heightened serum estrogen and progesterone in
their saliva.
They concluded that ACL injuries occurred most frequently on days 1 and 2 of menses, suggesting that ACL injury is not random but occurs more often around the time of menses, when circulating sex-hormone levels are low and after a time when both Estrogen and Progesterone were elevated.
Not sure what this means for female footballers or how this information can be used to avoid a serious injury but it is something which will hopefully be used by Clubs to manage their female players.
Keep Up The Green Bashing Rishi
Rishi Sunak seems to think that he has found a thread to pull on as his Government currently sit 20 points behind the Labour Party and are facing a tonking at next years General Election but if he plans to make Environment Issues a Left v Right thing then whoever is advising him should think again because
as he cuts back on Green Issues, his own supporters are not going with him.
A poll conducted by the right-leaning thinktank Onward has found that only 20% of Conservative voters support Sunak backtracking on green measures such as delaying delaying climate targets on boilers and electric vehicles and opening the Rosebank oilfield in the North Sea.
The survey of 4,000 adults found that the Tory voters ranked climate change as the most serious global challenge so unlike in America where it does seem to be a more partisan concept, Brits of all political flavours think we should be doing more to protect the Planet and shows just how out of touch the Government are but if he is alienating 80% of his own side with his wrongheaded policies, then long may that continue and i hope nobody is going to tell him.
Pillocks Of The Community - Fox And Wooton
Political journalist Ava Evans was been caught up in a media storm this week after she was publicly subjected to a vitriolic attack by Laurence Fox who took exception to her response to the suggestion that a Minister for Men could be appointed to tackle men's mental health might feed into a culture war as mental illness is a crisis that’s endemic throughout the country, not specific to men.
On GB News the next day Laurence Fox went straight to the misogynist and had an unhinged rant about how he wouldn't shag her but you would have to wonder just how many layers through the bottom of the barrel would any woman have to sink to want to be shagged by him.
Even Billy Piper woke up one day and came to the realisation that she had married him and immediately began divorce proceedings against the man who has made a career of saying something awful, calling it free speech and then apologising for it as he did when he spoke out about Sikh Soldiers, Black Live Matter and for posting an image of a swastika made from the LGBTQ+ Pride flag.
Fancying himself as a bit of a right wing Politician, he has lost his deposit for not gaining enough votes both times he has attempted to break into the sphere.
As for the Butthead to Laurence's Beavis, Dan Wooton, the guy has just been fired from his job at the Daily mail following an investigation into allegations of inappropriate and criminal conduct, including catfishing former colleagues, sexual harassment and paying male pornographic actors to
record their sexual activities with men he tricked using fake online identities so neither are pillars of the community, pillocks certainly but not pillars.
Both men have been suspended by GB News after Ofcom announced yet another investigation into the struggling Station who recently had so many Ofcom fines that the Station announced to their staff that they would have to pay the fines as it was proving too expensive for the station to keep paying them.
In his later apology to Evans, Fox said that he expects to be fired and Wooton may be keeping his head down but he shouldn't be banking on returning to his seat anytime soon and GB News, who called Fox's comments appalling, will be better for having neither of them on his payroll, not any better as a TV Station as it is the TV Station of right wing
deplorables with bizarre views about Climate Change and Covid denial, but removing these two from their payroll would be akin to scraping the dirt off a dog turd but it's a start.
Today Is...World Heart Day
There are a few theories how the heart shape got it's shape ranging from the shape of the female genitals to the shape of a mans testicles. It could have come from the shape of the tips of cupids arrows as painted by renaissance painters or just as easily have been based on the shape of a backside but i once heard the best explanation that i have always gone with, the shape made by two people kissing.
The chests pressed together, noses touching and the two people forming a perfect Valentine heart of space between them. Far better than the idea of an arse.
The heart shape was used by the Indus Valley civilisation although to them it was less about love and more about the fruit of a favourite plant and in ancient Japan, the heart symbol was based on a Wild Boars eyeball and was used to ward off evil spirits which isnt quite so romantic on a Valentines Card but in Europe in the Middle Ages artists began using a heart shape to mean love although not so much a heart as a pine cone which apparently was a thing to do back then.
In the early paintings a lover would offer a pine cone and the pine cone shape became the norm for depicting a lover giving his heart and influential later painters kept it and it become less the primary organ of your circulatory system and more the the symbol of love that we know today.
Thursday 28 September 2023
Today Is...Good King Wenceslaus Murdered
He was the son of Vratislaus I, Duke of Bohemia and enjoyed the easy life during the early 10th century, until his father was killed in battle and in 10th Century Europe, all things considered, being killed in a battle was a pretty good outcome.
His grandmother, a Christian, became regent but she was killed by her pagan mother who used her own veil because she was bringing her son up as a Christian, so his mum took the role of regent for herself and decided that she could get used to this whole ruling thing so set about ridding Bohemia of the Christian fad that was sweeping Europe but that backfired and she was forced into exile and Wenceslaus took control of the government.
His younger brother, Boleslav the Cruel, was always a mummy's boy so while he was bringing beggars out in the snow gathering firewood into his warm castle for a cup of hot turnip juice, his brother was plotting to kill him, and you didn't want to spend time with your family at Christmas!
The plan was to invite Wenceslaus to a meal to celebrate the feast of Saints Cosmas and Damian and to unify his family but the thought that he might not be handing out plates of Christmas cheer did cross his mind but Wenceslaus accepted the invitation believing that his own brother wouldn't really do that to him.
Wow, did he misjudge that because when he turned up at the gates, the brother and his goons all took it in turns to stab him to death and to make sure, ran him through with a lance and dismembered him.
Bring a gentler, kinder sould, Wenceslaus considered himself head and shoulders above his brother and he literally was, his head ended up on top of the gatehouse and his body in the moat but with hindsight, with a name like Boleslav the Cruel and the whole previous killing family members thing, he should have seen one that coming i guess.
Wednesday 27 September 2023
Today Is...World Tourism Day
The second most popular destination was Asia and 248 million tourists with China taking top spot with 57 million tourists and then the Americas taking 168 million and United States with 66 million tourists turning up at their shores, two thirds more than the next most popular destination Mexico.
With 56 million people holidaying in Africa, Morocco is the top destination in that continent, and 52m in the Middle East with Saudi Arabia that regions top draw, that is a lot of people moving around.
Due to the economic situation many people may decide to stay at home this year so while Britain may not have the climate of the Mediterranean or the sights of Paris or Rome, we do have some brilliantly named places to visit where you can see grinning tourists doing the double thumbs up at the town signs.
There is always a queue for putting the thumbs up in Twatt in Scotland but just south of the border in Cumbria, you won't be twiddling your thumbs in Cock Play or Cockermouth.
Across the pennines in the North East you are assured of a warm welcome in Wetwang and if you head south you will find Rimswell.
No trip around the Midlands is complete without stopping to take in the small but beautiful Bell End while Gloucestershire hosts the beautifully untouched and natural Lower Swell.
Across the border in Wales stands the impressive Three Cocks or you may decide to go across country to Essex and Fingrinhoe which is a designated conservation area with plenty of birds to watch at your leisure.
No trip along the South Coast is complete without stopping to have a look inside Thong before carrying on to Shitterton with a pause at Lickfold for refreshments.
Maybe your ideal trip is across the Irish Sea in the Emerald Isles and your first stop of Hackballscross before carrying on to the North Irish coast where hidden away is Muff, the wild, overgrown pastures of Lousybush, the never closed Fannystown and no tour of Ireland is complete if you don't end your tour in Cum.
Really, who needs abroad when we have such delights at home.
Tuesday 26 September 2023
Today Is...Most Popular Day In UK To Celebrate Birthday
I am confident that someone out there will be blowing out candles on a birthday cake later today because September 26th is the most popular day in the UK to celebrate being another year older.
More children are born in late September early October than in any other time of the year which even with my tenuous grip on maths suggests babies are most likely to be conceived around Christmas.
According to the Office for National Statistics (ONS) the most common birthday in England and Wales is 26 September so if you are one of those you share your special day with Ricky Tomlinson, Anne Robinson, Bryan Ferry, Linda Hamilton, Will Self, Michael Ballack, Serena Williams and Jon Richardson.
Hope you have a great day and remember at least you are not as old as you will be next year unless you have the good fortune to be born on Mars then due to the year being twice as long as it is here on Earth, you would be half whatever age you are now so go with that if anyone asks.
Monday 25 September 2023
Very Scilly
The Dutch call it the Driehonderdvijfendertigjarige Oorlog, but as that would make our English tongues fall out trying to say it, we call it the The Three Hundred and Thirty Five Years' War between the Netherlands and the Isles of Scilly located off the southwest coast of Great Britain.
It all began in with that lovable character Oliver Cromwell who battled the Royalists to the edges of the Kingdom, or Cornwall as it is also known, and running out of land to retreat to, they jumped on boats and paddled like mad to the Isles of Scilly off the coast of Cornwall which was under the ownership of Royalist John Granville.
The navy of the United Provinces of the Netherlands was at the time allied with Cromwell and the Parliamentarians and when their fleet turned up to give the retreating groups a damn good thrashing, they didn't realise they had canons and sunk several Dutch ships including Merchant ships so the Dutch
demand reparation from the Royalists for the Dutch ships and goods taken by them.
Long story short, the Scilly Islanders told the Dutch to go do one so the Dutch declared war on them but by then the English Navy had turned up and after threatening to canon them back to the stone age, the Scilly Islanders surrendered and the Dutch fleet, no longer under threat, left without firing a shot.
Fast forward to 1986 and the Chairman of the Isles of Scilly Council realised that no peace treaty had ever been signed and sent a letter to the Dutch Embassy in London asking if they were still officially at war with each other, the Dutch looked into it themselves and said 'Ja' so the Chairman invited them over to
officially end the conflict and peace was declared on 17 April 1986, 335 years after the war started.
Today Is...World Dream Day
as did Mary Shelley so we may not know what they are or why we have them, but they can be some very handy function of your brain's pineal gland activity.
I did find out that puffing too much on my ecigarette before being tucked up for the night can create some very lucid dreams which is cheaper than the dream scientists electromagnetic instruments to excite your hormones which they use to induce lucid dreams in experiments.
As well as frying your brain with magnetic waves, they also found that smells introduced into your sleeping nostrils cause dreams and the worse the smell the more negative the dreams as our sense of smell has a direct line to the subconscious areas of the brain, which affects emotion, mood, and memory so if wake up in a cold sweat after being chocked to death by the vacuum cleaner, check if your partner laying next to you had beans for their tea because they could be responsible for causing the nightmares.
Experts say that every night we on average experience around five dreams and they think they reflect our current state of mind and have interpreted the meanings of the most common dreams:
Teeth falling out (anxieties about your appearance and how others perceive you)
Being chased (you have issues that need to be tackled)
Unable to find a toilet (having trouble expressing yourself)
Being naked (you feel wrongly accused or exposed by someone)
Failing exams (you are in a situation you don't feel confident about)
Flying (someone or something is stopping you from moving to the next step in your life)
Falling (signifies insecurity and anxiety about a situation)
Crashing a car (You are unsure of the direction you are taking)
Running late (You feel like you are running out of time to get something done)
Wild Animals (You feel oppressed or constricted)
Ghosts (overwhelmed to guilt or the fear of something)
Dying (Concerns over a significant life change such as a breakup, leaving a job or relocating)
Sunday 24 September 2023
Today Is...National Day of Arts In Care Homes
Throughout history great works of art have been misunderstood so don't despair if your Grandpa's Sunset Over The Thames looks like a cat coughing up a furball, even The Mona Lisa by Leonardo da Vinci was called disappointing when it was first unveiled.
Les Demoiselles d'Avignon by Pablo Picasso was called vulgar and when Claude Monet presented Impression, Sunrise, he was asked when he was going to finish it while nobody liked Vincent van Gogh's Starry Night at first, the gallery removing it from sale as nobody wanted to buy it.
Salvador DalÃ's melting watches picture, 'The Persistence of Memory' was dismissed as a jumble of meaningless trash and The Scream by Edvard Munch was called despairing and disturbing.
Bathers At Asnieres by Georges-Pierre Seurat was called coarse and vulgar, critics described Slave Ship by J. M. W. Turner as a cat having a fit in a platter of tomatoes and even the The Last Judgment by Michelangelo was so disliked by the Pope that he had his pension suspended.
The ultimate WTF IS THAT must go to the Portrait of Dr. Felix Rey by Vincent Van Gogh who kindly gifted this portrait to the doctor who looked after him in the mental hospital and the Doctor took one look at it and found the perfect place for it, to line the bottom of his chicken coop.
In conclusion, just because a painting was not well received at the time of it's creation does not mean it is not a masterpiece so keep that picture on the fridge because in a few years it could be considered a masterpiece, probably not but you never know.
Saturday 23 September 2023
Learning Life Skills At School
We recently wrote a post which had people complaining about the things they were taught at school which turned out to have no bearing on their life including things such as Pi and Shakespeare but on the flip side, if we were to scrap things such as Calculus, the Periodic Table and learning how to play the playing the recorder we would have a large gap in the school day to fill so what should they teach instead?
The jump from sitting behind a school to adulthood in the real world is a big transition and there are some key life skills which you just have to bumble through somehow so a recent poll found that the practical skills which have a tangible use in the adult world they wished they knew about on leaving school are
buying a house, setting up a pension, banking and direct debits for bills, starting a business, paying taxes and how to change a tyre.
The argument is that the national curriculum is provided to give students a level of education so they can deal with the adult world but clearly there is a lot of things being spent time and effort teaching which is irrelevant once you’ve left the education setting so there is a gap there for when you have to brush up against things like the Banks, insurance companies and HM Revenue and Customs which can be quite daunting.
Crisis 13 Years In The Making
Liz Truss is widely made the scapegoat for the massive nosedive Britain's fortunes have taken and whilst it is true her 49 days in power were a disaster which cost the British economy £49 billion, the truth is that it has been 13 years in the making due to Conservative Party mismanagement, incompetence, cost cutting and outright nastiness.
The school concrete debacle is just the latest in a long line of Conservative austerity cuts coming home to roost, the plan to fix 200 schools a year cut to 100 and then halved again which led to the boast by Rishi Sunak that they are determined to fix 50 schools a year, a quarter of the original figure but it is just one example of Conservative party gaslighting.
From the very start in 2010, the first act was to introduce austerity measures in response to the 2008 financial crisis and Government Departments were shrunk by 40% which led to under-resourced services at every level while the amounts forwarded to local Councils were also slashed to half as well as disability payments which led to George Osborne as the Chancellor responsible being loudly booed while presenting a medal at the 20212 Paralympics.
Cuts to the NHS resulted in hospitals and clinics closing and waiting lists were growing long before the pandemic which gave them a handy thing to point towards while finding was at 1% rather than the traditional 4% needed and since 2010 NHS Staff have seen a 35% decrease in their wages, a downsizing which stretched across all the staff at the Government departments.
Brexit was the ultimate disaster and resulted in GDP shrinking by 4% meaning less revenue to the Treasury and as we no longer were within the EU, the Government withdrew all immigration agreements so immigrants having to resort to paying traffickers whose business boomed with small boats crossing the Channel reaching record levels and the Home Office staff cuts resulted in asylum claims taking over 12 months to process.
The Pandemic exposed Boris Johnson and his Government for the crooks and liars they were as a spaffed £37 billion up a wall and Cabinets ministers and their friends filled their boots with taxpayers money while ignoring their own rules.
Councils are now going into bankruptcy as they are no longer able to balance their books with the reduced central Government money, schools are literally crumbling, the NHS is at breaking point and strikes are affecting everyone at every department so whether it is austerity, the rolling back of the state or reduced services, it is difficult to see where the Tories can claim to have really delivered because the golden rule is are the Government leaving the nation in a better state than they found it and it is almost impossible to find any section where they can point to as a success except in the implication of their right wing ideology which has been a disaster on every level .
Female Serial Killers
The Lucy Letby baby murders were shocking on so many levels, babies killed or injured by a Nurse meant to care for them, and one was the fact that she was such an unlikely serial killer which is how she managed to get away with it to continue her killing for so long.
Dr Marissa Harrison is a professor of psychology and admits that female serial killers are rare but using examples gathered from 64 Female Serial Killers, in 40% of female serial killers are nurses, nurses aides or other healthcare workers but there is generally a forensic profile for them based on previous serial killers although they say it is by no means a predictor of future crimes.
They are also likely to have been married, white, religious, educated, average looking or attractive, in their 20s or 30s and have suffered some form of mental illness and the victims are usually vulnerable people such as infants and the sick and and their most common method of killing was poisoning.
The description applies to many nurses we know and almost every nurse or medical professional who has ever lived would never harm anyone and the psychologists are at pains to point out that the profile is a starting point for whom and what to look for when serial murder is suspected.
Concerns were raised by colleagues and doctors at the Countess of Chester hospital but these were dismissed mainly, Dr Harrison believes, due to Letby not fitting into the idea of a killer, she was a female and a nurse, so nobody was able to process that she was a killer and brushed off as not possible which has happened in previous hospital and care home based cases.
We must be prepared, says the Dr, to look beyond our preconceived notions of who a murderer might be and consider that sometimes, the monster is a female nurse and an an otherwise ordinary, unremarkable woman.
Exposing Shrinkflation
I was always one of those who would join in the 'i'm sure these are smaller than i remember' regarding Wagon Wheels or Mars Bars and it was always explained that your hands were smaller as a kid so in your adult hands it would look smaller and that kind of made sense until you stop and think about it and remember that it is big Capitalist companies producing these things and obviously they would try and charge the same while discretely reducing the product and deny doing it so a massive thumbs up to French Supermarket Carrefour who are not only pointing out the companies doing it but putting huge yellow
arrows to draw attention to it.
Carrefour has began putting labels on its shelves warning shoppers of 'shrinkflation' and has slapped price warnings on products from Lindt chocolates to Lipton iced tea to pressure the likes of Nestlé, PepsiCo and Unilever who complained that they had to do it due to an increase in the raw material which Carrefour pointed out is not a thing as the raw costs are now back to where they were.
A bottle of sugar-free peach-flavoured Lipton iced tea shrank to 1.25 litres from 1.5 litres and Nestlé infant formula went from 900 grams to 830 grams while Viennetta ice-cream cake shrank to 320 grams from 350 grams and all now wear a label which reads: 'This product has seen its volume or weight fall
and the effective price from the supplier rise'.
Great you may think until a consumer Group pointed out that shrinkflation is also a thing with Carrefour's own brands so a plague on both your greedy money grabbing houses.
Today Is...International Day of Sign Languages
You don't need to go on a course to learn rude hand gestures because the British language has a rich source such as the V sign which is deemed the weaker cousin of the middle finger and mostly deployed by drivers when someone has cut them up.
Beloved by heavy metal fans, the horn sign may say you like headbanging but doing it at a Metallica concert in some countries in the Mediterranean and Latin America regions it means you enjoy watching your wife commit adultery with other men which could get your wife some unwanted attention.
If you want to order 5 of something you may push forward your hand with 5 fingers held up but do that in Greece and it's their version of the middle finger while if you do it in Iran you are suggesting that they drop dead which would probably end with you receiving 5 fingers curled into a fist and thrust forcibly onto your nose while in some African and Caribbean countries it means 'you have five fathers' thus calling someone a bastard which may see you not only not served but leaving the premises through a window.
I regularly use the Fonzy style thumbs up 'All Is Good' gesture but do that in some Arab countries and it's flipping them the finger but i am not one for the universal OK sign of making an O with your thumb and forefinger but if you are then you may want to just smile politely if you find yourself in the Mediterranean, Middle East and several South American countries where you are cheerfully calling them an arsehole.
In Vietnam if you want to wish someone good luck then crossing your fingers won't be particularly lucky for you because it depicts a woman’s genitalia, the hand-sign alternative of calling someone the c-word so doing what you think is universal sign language outside of your own land may seem a good idea but it might not be when travelling so keeping your hands firmly in your pockets may be your best option.
Friday 22 September 2023
The New Conservative Party Strategy
The Conservatives have came up with an ingenious wheeze where they announce abolishing unpopular Government policies without even bothering to have them as Government policies in the first place. Genius!
In a surprise speech this week, Rishi Sunak announcing he was scrapping a number of heavy-handed measures that would hit people in their pockets.
so on the rubbish heap goes compulsory carpooling along with forcing seven types of recycling bins in our homes and any taxes on Meat are now a no-no which led many Conservative Politicians to look at each other and say 'We were going to do all that?'
When it was put to Sunak that he was pretending to halt frightening proposals that simply do not exist he disagreed and said that these were all things which have been raised by very credible people about ways to meet our net zero obligations which turned out to be the notes from a Conservative Party think tank
meeting and were about as close to becoming policies as Boris Johnson was to a hairbrush.
Maybe it is a new way of British politics where the Government think up something unpopular and then announce they are not doing it and expect everyone to sing their praises for being great people for not doing something which they had no plans on ever doing anyway.
To be fair as the Conservatives are currently facing a dicking of biblical proportions when they get around to calling a General Election then you can't blame them for trying something desperate and boy this was desperate if they thought they would get away with it.
Today Is...The Autumnal Equinox
As we are into the twenty second day of September it's time to put away the shorts and sun tan lotion as Summertime is through as the Beach Boys once lamented.
After two bouts of painful sunburn, countless hot nights turning over the pillow trying to find a cool spot and numerous bites and stings on my arms and legs, i am quite happy to watch another summer slip into Autumn but as most of the country is finding out, Summer turning into Autumn also means returning to work.
Britain is full of 'On Holiday' notices in Summer as people disappear to various parts the globe and come back all suntanned and shiny faced to the reality that it is back to the slog and a long time to the Christmas break.
T-shirts, cut offs and a pair of thongs give way to jumpers, tights and sensible flat shoes while miniature golf and Honda's in the heat becomes paperclips and meetings but you know in November, while your tan has faded, the clock seems to be going backwards and you are staring out of the window watching the rain drumming against the window, you will hear that summer song and you will be transported back to this summer and begin daydreaming about the you had fun all summer long.
Of course then your boss will walk in and shout at you for daydreaming while the Wilson contract hasn't been signed and sent you spinning back to the reality of a cold, rainy Autumnal afternoon.
Maybe remembering the pain of sunburn and the three times you had to apply Anthisan to the insect bites would be better and think 'pfft...Summer is so over-rated'.
Thursday 21 September 2023
Today Is...International Day of Peace
If you watch the news or read a newspaper you will get the impression that the world isn't always a very peaceful place with terror attacks, violent protests and wars but while many countries are experiencing some sort of conflict, others have found ways to keep peace and the Global Peace Index Report is out and
lists the most to least peaceful places on our planet.
Using 23 qualitative and quantitative indicators, whatever Iceland is doing we should be following because it is rated the most peaceful once again for the 10th year followed by New Zealand, Portugal, and Austria.
As for the least peaceful countries, Afghanistan was ranked the lowest, with Syria, South Sudan, Yemen and Iraq close behind.
The United Kingdom ranked 45th most peaceful, up 5 places, with the United States down 4 places to a lowly 128th and Russia an even lower 153 out of 163.
The Middle East and North Africa region are the world’s least peaceful region with Europe again the most peaceful region with 22 of the top 36 nations European countries.
The results this year show that the average level of global peacefulness improved very slightly so we are getting there, just depressingly slowly.
Wednesday 20 September 2023
Today Is – The Pennsylvania Walking Purchase Concludes
William Penn was an English writer, religious thinker and Quaker who was an advocate of democracy and religious freedom known for his amicable relations and successful treaties with the Lenape Native Americans who lived Pennsylvania at the time but relations took a swift turn for the worse when his family took control and demanded more area from the Native Americans who, not ones to argue with armed men at a meeting, agreed to a deal which would give over some of their land in the West of the area to the expanding colonists, as much land as a man could walk in a day.
Known as the Walking Purchase, the Native Americans put that distance at about 40 miles but the Penns hired the three fastest runners and set them off and they got to 70 miles which they somehow unfairly rounded up to equaling 1876 square miles (calculator's hadn't been invented yet obviously) and they have been arguing over it ever since.
Why is an English woman concerned with Pennsylvania you may ask? Well because last year i became an honorary Pennsylvanian after getting onto the Democrat email list and regularly receive updates on what Jo Biden (when he's awake) and his gang is doing and it always comes with a request for a donation from 'your area'.
This got me wondering where did they think i was because my area is the UK and last time i looked at an atlas (admittedly quite a while ago), the UK was not an area in the USA.
Another email cleared it up as it was from the computer of John Fetterman, the Candidate for Pennsylvania, who is asking people from my area, from Erie to Pittsburgh to Scarnton to Philly to contribute $10, $25, $50, $100 or $250.
As a non-yankee doodle i obviously contributed a big fat nothing but i did offer something more valuable than financial help to Mr Fetterman, i advised that in his picture he was obviously trying for serious and statesmanlike and i am sure he was a lovely man but to be fair it makes him looks like the sort of person i would phone the police about if i saw you hanging around my car. Try for a smile rather than the 'You wanna keep those kneecaps?' glare.
I then wished him good luck in his upcoming election and signed off with a cheery Go Steelers!! (in whatever sport it is that they play)
Tuesday 19 September 2023
Today Is...Talk Like a Pirate Day
The South West of England lent itself to piracy thanks to coves and inlets which were helpful for hiding and smuggling goods so the West Country accents became prevalent in the Golden Age of Piracy between the 1650s and 1730s.
The most famous of all pirates, Blackbeard, was from the South West as was Woodes Rogers, Francis Drake, Walter Raleigh and John Hawkins and Robert Louis Stevenson based Long John Silver on the pirates he met in Bristol taverns.
So there was a lot of West Country accents shivering their timbers all over the High Sea's but it was the actor Robert Newton who voiced many Hollywood Pirate Films in his West Country twang and it was this accent which became synonymous with pirates thereafter.
There was one South West Pirate who can be thanked for introducing many new words to the English language, William Dampier, who gave us over 1,000 words because when he wasn't raiding Spanish settlements and plundering other people's ships in South and Central America, he was writing about the flora and fauna and compiled a book and gave the language avocado, barbecue, breadfruit, cashew, chopsticks, posse, tortilla, banana, castaway, sea-breeze, subspecies, intelligence, free trade, maroon, soy sauce and kumquat.
He may not go into the annals of history as the greatest pirate but if you find yourself today mentioning the names for the curved yellow fruit thingy or using live fire and smoke to cook food and using grabby sticks to pick up green mushy thingies, you are literally talking like a pirate.
Monday 18 September 2023
Today Is...National Cheeseburger Day
Probably the most famous purveyor of animal meat is McDonald's and over the last 65 years their website proudly claims that 1 in 8 Americans have worked at a McDonald's restaurant at some point which they claim shows what a caring, sharing employer they are.
While it is always nice when an employer express concern over their employees health, it's probably not so good for their customers when they are advised to avoid whatever it is that they are selling to the public.
Caring, sharing McDonald's once had a warning on its McResource site that it's own employee's should avoid burgers and fries whenever possible due to the health risks.
'Fast foods are quick, reasonably priced, and readily available alternatives to home cooking. While convenient and economical for a busy lifestyle, fast foods are high in calories, fat, saturated fat, sugar, and salt and may put people at risk of becoming overweight' the site helpfully explains.
'Instead of eating a cheeseburger and fries, eat at places that offer a variety of salads, soups and vegetables to maintain your best health'.
Priceless, just hope that as many customers as possible heed the don't-eat-our-crap message.
Sunday 17 September 2023
Today Is...Use Your Illusions 1 & 2 Released
That would be me then, along with 20 other rather more grubbier looking GnR fans waiting for the doors to open at midnight and to swap a ten pound note and a few pound coins for the Guns 'N' Roses epic double album, Use Your Illusions 1 & 2.
I always knew it was going to be good because back then HMV only did the Midnight opening for a few of the very biggest and best and for me Gun N Roses were all about Slash, the coolest man ever to pluck a guitar string and knock out a guitar riff so sharp it threatens eyeballs whenever it comes on the radio The vinyl may have been upgraded to CD over the years but you would be hard pushed to come up with a set of albums that top arguably these last great epics in music history. Every song on the first album a real belter, the second not quite so much but two albums that legitimately lifted Guns N’ Roses from being a great rock band into probably the greatest ever.
Probably the greatest anti-war song ever penned, 'Civil War', and the opening lyrics of 'Look at your young men fighting, Look at your women crying, Look at your young men dying' should be etched on the forehead of every armchair general the next time war rears it ugly, ridiculous head.
Use Your Illusions 2 had some amazing songs (Civil war, You Could Be Mine, Knockin' on Heavens Door) but never landed quite as well as UYI 1 and the double album was the last proper Guns N Roses offering with the original line up although they put out the Spaghetti Incident full of 70s punk songs and named after an infamous Mötley Crüe groupie encounter...ask your parents.
The years of soaking their cornflakes in Jack Daniels, knocking seven bells out of each other while smoking 120 Benson & Hedges and still managing to put on a show before collapsing off stage into their own sick took it's toll and they imploded in acrimony not long after and although Axel Rose continued to plow his own furrow and finally put out 'Chinese Democracy' a few years ago, it wasn't the same.
Slash also did his own thing with other lead singers but it was like having a bottle of Moët & Chandon and drinking it from a mug.
Guns N' Roses were about the only band i would say i was sad about about when they broke up but as we were just launching into the Grunge scene it softened the blow a bit but for four glorious years they debauched their way around the charts, always drunk, mostly high, generally unkempt and smelling strongly of alcohol and their own vomit which is just how rock stars should be.
Saturday 16 September 2023
Today Is...International Day For The Preservation Of The Ozone Layer
The World rallied and in 1989 the Montreal Protocol came into effect which banned the use of CFCs and by the mid 90s, despite opposition from some in the chemical industry, the use of CFC's were almost eliminated and now, decades after it was first noticed, the ozone layer is well on its way to having repaired
itself and is expected to be back to full strength by the middle of the century and credit must go to the greens in the mid-80s who campaigned to ban ozone-destroying chemicals.
Proof indeed that decisive international action can avert self-imposed disaster and it is the same political will that is needed to deal with the threat of climate change.
Why was it that our Governments of the 80's and 90's heard of a threat to our planet and it's population and rallied around to act so decisively while the governments of today seem to come up with all manner of reasons to avoid making the cuts we need to reduce the worst effects of climate change?
The problem it seems is the lack of political will to act which was shown in the 80s, afraid that to do something would be detrimental to corporate interests, the same people who donate so much money to Governments that it would be economically suicidal for our leaders to pass any laws that would hit their donaters profits because 40 years on from the Governments of the 80s, the main difference is that economic growth and profit tops the list of priorities before saving the planet.
Friday 15 September 2023
Earth Failed It's Health Check
Scientist's have given the Earth it's 4.5 Billion Years Health Check and found that it isn't in the best shape and is exceeding it's safe operating space for humanity which doesn't sound particularly good for those of us living on it.
Six of nine key measurements of its health are failing and two of the remaining three are heading in the wrong direction although it is doing fine in its Ozone layer after we punched a massive hole in it a few decades back.
The planet's climate, biodiversity, land, freshwater, nutrient pollution and novel chemicals (human-made compounds like microplastics and nuclear waste) are all off-kilter, according to the group of international scientists while on the downward spiral is the acidity of the oceans and the health of the air we breathe
which led the co-author Johan Rockstrom, director of the Potsdam Institute for Climate Impact Research in Germany to conclude 'We are in very bad shape' and 'the patient is sick'.
All is not lost yet though as Computer simulations showed we can turn the Earth around by cleaning up its land and saving forests which would tick the planet back into the not likely to keel over any second clutching its chest portion of the Health Check.
Carnegie Mellon University environmental engineering professor Granger Morgan said if we don't quickly cut back on how we are stressing the Earth, we're toast' which is true but not such a catchy phrase as that chosen by one Environmentalist scientist recently who summed it up more more colourfully with Not totally f$%@ed but far from totally unf$@%*ed!'
NASA Reports We Don't Know
The email in my inbox explained that NASA were about to brief on what they knew about UFO's and what they knew turned out to be we just don't know.
Firstly UFOs are out, the acronym is now UAP (Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena) which i don't think will catch on by anyway, secondly there is currently no scientific evidence for UAPs being extraterrestrial and most sightings are merely aircraft, drones or balloons.
While NASA will continue to investigate sightings, it said that it's real tme and effort is spent searching for extraterrestrial life on rocky planets orbiting distant stars with missions looking for biosignatures from exoplanets and not in our skies or making crop circles in farmers fields
The report won't satisfy those who believe there are government cover-ups to conceal alien encounters and when asked whether NASA would actually share any evidence of an extraterrestrial cause, they replied: 'You bet your boots we will'.
With almost everybody holding a camera in the palm of their hands via their smartphones, it is not that surprising that nobody has managed to capture more conclusive evidence other than grainy videos of some blurred object far away and even the whistleblowing from a former U.S. intelligence officer who said he
had evidence of extraterrestrial artifacts was dismissed as: 'he had no evidence for us to reach any definitive conclusions when we asked for it'.
Disappointing on some levels but completely expected.
Oil Companies Evil Shocker
There are some people who doubt Climate Change is happening for a variety of reasons including from the Churchy set who think God should be left to sort it out and then there are those who see not destroying the Planet as a 'left wing' thing and even those who decided to ignore the view of 99% of Scientific Experts and get behind the 1% who think it isn't happening, even when they find out they they have been handsomely paid to say it.
Following a summons by the New York Attorney General as part of an investigation into ExxonMobil, it shows how the oil company sought to undermine climate science by a decades-long misinformation campaign and funding climate-denier groups and paying scientists to write papers about the uncertainty of measuring greenhouse gas emissions.
The documents also show Exxon’s displeasure with scientific warnings from the scientists at the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change and the way the media were covering the message that greenhouse gas emissions needed to be curbed.
The Companies executives wanted to engage with the scientists to try and negatively influence other scientists and amplify the Climate Change denial which will all go into the evidence against the oil companies who are facing legal action from 24 US Cities to hold them accountable for their attempts to sow doubt about climate science.
Obviously the Planet's Climate is changing and changing at the quickest rate for millions of years, you would need to be a hugely useful idiot of these companies to not see that but to deny it and know the people you are siding with were handsomely paid to say it just makes you a gullible moron of biblical proportions.
Today Is...International Day Of Democracy
As usual, Scandinavia comes out best with Norway the most democratic nation followed by Iceland and then Sweden, the UK is the 14th most democratic country while the USA is 21st and was downgraded to a 'flawed democracy' last year and remains in the same class as nations such as India, Chile, South Africa, Greece, Colombia and Mexico.
Overall, across the world, democratic norms are slipping, according to the Index authors blaming declining trust in institutions, erosion of civil liberties and curbs on freedom of speech and curtailing freedom of the media under the guise of prevention of terrorism laws, blasphemy and 'hate speech' laws.
The rest of the world’s population live in a hybrid or authoritarian regime with North Korea the lowest-ranking country on the list along with Syria, Chad and Central African Republic.
As for the 95% of those not living in a full democracy, placing a cross on a ballot paper every five years in order to hand over political control to a party is as much say as we have. Yes we can remove a Government but once in they are there for a long time and short of a revolution, we are stuck with them and it's 60 months until Democracy wheels its way back again.
I wouldn't be that upset if your country is not in the top class as Democracy is 1 day every 1826 days so for 1825 days we are no different and the youth are catching on to the idea with a Center for the Future of Democracy report finding that 52% of British under 38's say they are not satisfied with democracy.
They don't offer any explanation of just why there is a disconnect between the next generation of Brits and Democracy but it isn't hard to hazard a guess, you only have to look at the inept morons in Downing Street to see that electing a leader is not always a considered vote for the best possible person to do the job.
There are many forms of Government, some are better than others, but we can look around now and honestly say something has to be better than what we have but with AI becoming more important in running our lives, there must be something said for removing humans from the decision making process because we have made a bit of a pigs ear of it so far.
Thursday 14 September 2023
Today Is...British Empire Loses 11 Days
The handing it to the Protestants didn't go well so he decided to have another look at the calendar and worked out that the problem was that the Earth and the Sun refused to create a year that's composed of a nice round number of days and the Julian calendar, which was prominent in most of the Western world for more than 1,600 years, had an average year of exactly 365.25 days long and it was losing a day a century.
He shortened the day by 0.0075 days, making a year 365.2425 days and by tinkering with the leap years, he corrected the Julian calendar which meant that to bring everything back into line, everyone had to jump 11 days which immediately annoyed anyone whose birthday was between those dates.
The calendar now made a lot more sense with some months having 31 days, some 30 and February with it's 28, except when it doesn't and all the Catholic countries were like 'Hey Cool, we got a new calendar' but the Protestant countries like Britain refused to accept it at first, the British people thinking the sneaky
Catholics were trying to steal 11 days from them so they stuck with the Calendars with kittens in various cute poses and topless firemen hanging in their kitchens for a further two years until it all got too confusing and in 1752 they decided to join in the fun and make it when you went to bed on the 2nd September you woke up the following morning on the 14th.
As there is no law to say you HAVE to use the Gregorian version, you could always switch between the two and going Julian and then back to the Gregorian and losing those 11 days again later in the year, a few days before your spouses birthday would be especially cost saving. Win-Win.
Wednesday 13 September 2023
Today Is...Jimi Hendrix Day
What i didn't know was that the character was based on a real life person, Jimi Hendrix.
According to his own discharge papers, Hendrix displayed behaviour problems, required excessive supervision, has little regard for regulations and was apprehended masturbating in the platoon area while on duty.
To fans of feedback noise and 10 minute guitar solo's, Hendrix is arguably the greatest guitarist ever but he wouldn't be winning any awards for soldiering but then to be fair, he only enlisted in the Army to avoid going to prison for stealing cars.
To avoid any embarrassment, Hendrix's record company said that that his medical discharge was for a broken ankle following a parachute jump but now we know the real reason, i consider his recording of 'All Along The Watchtower' to be more of an explanation of what he was doing when he was apprehended in the platoon area that day.
He regularly got the blame for introducing the nations youth to drugs but some say that he was so good he could play in his sleep, shame he wasn't so good at throwing up in his sleep while stoned, that would have been much more useful as he went to that giant speaker in the sky as a member of one of the most exclusive clubs, aged just 27.
Tuesday 12 September 2023
Today Is...The Battle Of Marathon
Sent by his commanders to run from Athens to Sparta to ask for assistance, he ran a distance of 140 miles and then quite understandably promptly died of exhaustion but the Spartans marched the 25 miles to head off a Persian army and somehow that became the distance for future marathons.
The Olympic organisers were looking for a great event which recalled the ancient glory of Greece and legend has it that the person who came up with it when they were organising the modern Olympics got his wired crossed but then they just went with it anyway because making athletes run 140 miles was deemed atad excessive.
The first modern Olympics in 1896 did run from Marathon to Athens and the event proved so popular that it became a permanent fixture at the Olympic Games, with the distance starting at 25 miles then increased to 26 miles and then becoming fixed at 26 miles 385 yards in 1921 when the British Royal Family wanted the runners to finish directly in front of their viewing box, which added on the extra 385 yards.
Monday 11 September 2023
Today Is...World Trade Center Attack
The most agreed upon theory is that the President set it up as a justification to go on a war frenzy in the Middle East to remove Saddam Hussein from Iraq, a conspiracy which gained further traction when it was shown that the President had to defend his extremely tenuous links between Saddam and the 9/11 attack while all of the terrorists were Saudi Arabian.
The fallout from that day shaped the rest of the decade in almost every conceivable way, spawning the 'War on Terror', distancing the United States under the administration of George W Bush from a large portion of the rest of the World, fatally wounding the premiership of Tony Blair and left so many people dead and dying that the number is counted in the hundreds of thousands.
Within less than a month of the atrocity, the bombs were falling on Afghanistan although the White House focus had always been on an even more controversial target, Saddam Hussein and Iraq.
With the Afghanistan War underway, Bush and Blair embarked upon on a massive effort using spin, deception and flat out lies to persuade the public that the trail of guilt for 9/11 somehow led to Baghdad, an argument that fractured long held global alliances.
Despite Bush standing beneath a banner declaring 'Mission Accomplished' in 2003, the continuation of the Iraq and Afghan wars cast a long shadow over the entire decade. Bush won a second term much to our surprise but the depth of feeling against the war in the UK, along with confirmation that Saddam did not have weapons of mass destruction as warned, broke public trust in Blair and saw him bounced out of power by his own party with the lowest ever ratings for a Labour Prime Minister.
It wasn't until 2021 that the Americans withdrew from Iraq and Afghanistan in defeat, allowing the Taliban to take back control in Afghanistan and leaving the Iraqi's at the mercy of ISIS so the World is not a safer place and the UK's and America's reputation for human rights took a beating so it does make
you ask, was it all worth it?
Sunday 10 September 2023
And The Point Of Learning That Was?
According to research commissioned by global learning platform Quizlet, 57% of Brits agree that they were forced to learn things at school which have been of no practical use to them since and have not helped them in the real world.
I have mentioned a few times how what i learnt in Mathematics's in the 80's only succeeded in taking up vital brain space that i could have otherwise allocated to learning the lyrics to New Wave songs and that wasn't just me because Algebra, Pythagoras Theorem and Pi all appear on the 'Why the hell did they waste the time teaching us that' list.
Science is also features heavilly with how to use a Bunsen Burner, the Periodic Table, parts of a cell and how to dissect a frog in the top 10 although i refused to cut up the frog and was made to stand outside the class with the others who said the same. I also got sent outside for holding a coin over a Bunsen Burner until it was red hot which is somehow disrespecting the Queen, i even remember my detention for that where i had to write out 500 times i will be more respectful to our Queen so i may not have learnt much from Science classes but it sure did improve my handwriting.
I was a very sporty child and played many sports but since i left school the hours spent on the school field learning the correct way to throw a Javelin has never come in handy so that makes the top ten as does the months of torturing our parents with the recorder with Three Blind Mice because i could count the exact amount of times i have picked up the instrument since and that number is zilch.
The top 10 is rounded out by people saying that learning quotes from William Shakespeare but i don't agree with this one because although i always thought Shakespeare's stories sucked, being able to continue the few short phrases most people know is the ultimate in sounding smart alecky.
Today Is...Smells Like Teen Spirit Released
Back then MTV still played music videos and Smells like Teen Spirit was played on a continuous loop and that fast and slow tempo, loud chorus and quiet verse of Teen Spirit really hit a nerve as did Lithium and the slower paced Come As You Are with it's line 'i don't have a gun' which he obviously did as we found out four years later.
The lyrics were not earth-shattering, it takes a certain genius or a copious amount of whatever Cobain was smoking at the time to appreciate: 'A mulatto, An albino, A mosquito, My libido, Yeah' but it was always about the music although i am not sure what they were aiming at with their follow up Albums, especially the Unplugged Album, but whatever it was they missed.
The argument is always would Cobain have written such a classic as Smells like Teen Spirit without bucketloads of hard drugs and the answer is probably not but then he wouldn't have decorated that upstairs room a dark shade of brain grey without it either.
The Guinness World Records named 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' as the most Played Video" on MTV Europe, it was included in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's list of The Songs That Shaped Rock and the NME ranked the song the number 2 on its list of Greatest Singles of All Time, while Kerrang! ranked it at number 1 and Rolling Stone ranked it at number 5 on theirs.
Cobain was very open about how the song's melody was basically a rip off of something the Pixies would write with their soft and quiet verses and and then loud and hard choruses and that became their signature sound although by the time Cobain took his own life Nirvana were past their prime, the band had even added another guitarist as Cobain's drug ravaged brain was apparently forgetting the chords of his own songs.
As with so many celebrities, dying early turned out to be a boon for his career and 30 years on i see teenagers who were not even born in the 90's wearing Nirvana t-shirts and all from message a friend leaving him a note to buy deodorant because he stank.
The greatest stroke of luck was that his friend never wrote Kurt needs Lynx as that's a tough one to make rhyme.
Saturday 9 September 2023
Today Is...Emergency Services Day
Who you gonna call? Not the emergency services obviously because every year they publish the most time wasting calls and you do wonder how some people manage to find their way out of their own front door in the morning.
Someone dialled 999 and asked for the police to report that she had bought a cold kebab and the shop wouldn't replace it with a hot one and a woman called to report a man dressed as a clown who was overcharging for balloons.
A man called to say his 50p coin was stuck in a washing machine at the launderette and he wanted police to retrieve it while another reported the theft of his TV remote control because he couldn't find it anywhere.
The Police received a phone call from someone complaining that they had been waiting for a pizza delivery for 45 minutes and another to report her neighbours cat because it kept coming into her garden and another called because someone had vandalised their snowman.
The Ambulance Service said the number of times they get called out as some man has his penis stuck somewhere or they stepped out the shower and 'fell' and got something jammed up their backside is amazingly high as is the number of calls they get for a lift to A & E.
One lady phoned to tell them her husbands dog needed to go outside to pee and as they had taken him to hospital it was their responsibility to come take him out.
Unfortunately, medical science hasn't yet come up with a medicine for stupid.
Friday 8 September 2023
Stay Cool And Avoid White Clothes
Day six of the UK Heatwave and i am quickly running out of white clothes because as everyone knows white clothes reflect the sun rays thus keeping you cooler or so i always thought until some professor of environmental physiology stuck her oar in and said actually, wearing white in a heatwave doesn't do diddly squat to keep you cool and can even make you hotter.
A week of wearing white tops and drinking and eating everything especially carefully wasted so why is what almost everybody knows, wrong?
Heat, it turns out, doesn't just come from the sun but it also comes from our bodies too and when our body heat hits the white clothing, it is reflected back at us making us even warmer.
She suggests taking a leaf from the desert dwelling Bedouins who wear black robes in the desert because dark coloured fabrics are a better radiator of heat which means they absorb heat emanating from the body, cooling your body down.
The real secret apparently is to wear loose-fitting black clothing, as the loose black clothes heat up the space between the fabric and the skin, promoting an upward air current so the heat absorbed by the black clothes is lost before it reaches the skin and providing cooling relief.
If you really want to keep cool, she suggests, then strip off completely because clothes protect your skin from burning but being naked is better for keeping cool as the heat evaporates away from the body completely which may be fine in the privacy of your own home but may not go down so well in the Supermarket.
Today Is...Rugby World Cup Rugby Starts
I don't understand rugby, all i know is man gets oval shaped ball, man gets hit by larger man which continues until a big man manages to fall over behind the posts and i do mean to sit down and watch it but, to be frankly honest, once it starts i quickly lose interest and watch QI on catchup instead.
Rugby to me has always been a bit of a game they play 'up North' and not something us sophisticated latte drinking Southerners do and also a game the toffs indulge in, just posh fat men jumping on each other while clutching a (or each others) funny shaped balls.
The stereotype is confirmed when they open their mouths to talk and you can blatantly hear the private school accent, not that it makes much difference either way because our football team is full of state educated players and they are awful (both in a football and personality way) so i will keep an eye out in the back of the newspaper for the rugby score but it is unlikely that i will be going out of my way to watch
22 big fat men running into each other for 80 minutes.
P.S. If you South Africans can find your way to stop being rubbish and win me £20 it would be very much appreciated, thank you.
Thursday 7 September 2023
Today Is...World Beard Day
Before anyone gets the idea of a doctor-prescribed beard, it obviously didn't work and actually the Bacteria just stuck to the facial hair and thrived which was the exact opposite effect of what they thought but there are a few cases of death by beard.
Hans Staininger, a 16th-century Austrian politician, had a 7ft beard which he would roll up and put in his pocket although one night he woke to find a fire had broken out across the street and rushing to warn his fellow townspeople, tripped over his beard and fell down a flight of stairs, breaking his neck in the process.
He did get a statute in his town and his actual beard was removed and preserved in a glass case which isn't a bad legacy but probably my favourite beard story comes from those Jihadi terrorists of the Islamic State who came up with the wheeze of escaping the Nigerian Defence Forces who had cordoned off a town by attempting to sneak passed the Defence Force by disguising themselves as women.
To avoid annoying Allah, they kept their thick beards and mingled with the female folk and were caught immediately.
Wednesday 6 September 2023
Ouch!
You would think that the most dangerous sex position would be on the window ledge of a high rise block or whilst driving on the motorway but it turns out that the world’s most dangerous sexual position is the reverse cowgirl with the man laying on his back with the woman sitting on top, facing away from him.
Not that it is dangerous for women, it's the man who is at risk of fracturing his penis which probably is as painful as it sounds.
According to a Dr Karan Raj, the position was responsible for up to 50% of bedroom-related broken penises, crushed by by the female pubic bone although he did later explain that of course the human penis doesn’t have any bones in it so it isn't actually a human fracture but more bending something the way nature never intended which causes a haematoma formation and deformity which admittedly isn't a name which is likely to bring a tear to a man's eye as a fractured penis but better safe than sorry so maybe stick to the missionary position, as this was responsible for only 26% of broken men's todgers.
How Old Is Too Old For President?
The question nobody in American politics seem comfortable tackling is why are all the top politicians so old?
Sure age brings experience but at what point should a politician, or someone close to them whisper in their ear, that it's time to clear the field for the next generation and this became obvious when the 81 year old Senator Mitch McConnell, suffered a senior moment when asked a question and stood silent, staring into space for 30 seconds before being rescued by an aide who ushered him away.
It was the second time in little more than a month that he had frozen while speaking to journalists but with 80 year old Biden running for a second term which would see him hit 86 at the end, it is clear why his opposition are trying to avoid making any capital out of it.
Biden is already America’s oldest ever President and showing signs that age is catching up with him and a recent opinion poll found that more than three in four Americans think he would be too old to be effective while Republican Donald Trump, 77, is the second oldest ever President and current front-runner for the party nomination in 2024 has the same, although less obvious so far, mental challenges.
The average age of the Senate is 64 and one of the oldest memberships of any parliamentary body in the world and you would assume if there was a few hot-shots waiting in the wings of either side they would have emerged but nobody seems to be rising to the challenge.
Republican candidates Nikki Haley, 51 called the Senate the most privileged nursing home in the country and it's members should know when to leave and with a rematch between Biden and Trump appearing a likely scenario next year, her view is supported by 60% of Americans who told a Reuters/Ipsos poll that they were very or somewhat concerned that the members of Congress are too old to represent the American people.
Far be it from me to know at what age a politician should be asked to retire but it seems that only Ronald Reagan was willing to discuss his opponent's age when the 73 year old Reagan, when asked if he was too old to govern, replied: 'I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent's youth and inexperience'.
Today Is...Read a Book Day
It then went on to confuse things by saying that doesn't include self published books which according to UNESCO, is about 2.2 million books every year so if we say the minimum is around 150 million then that kind of feels underwhelming for 600 years of publishing but writing a book is hard work so it must be even more annoying for an author to slave over a quill/pen/typewriter/computer for months on end to then only have the thing you created misunderstood.
F. Scott Fitzgerald said that of his novel The Great Gatsby, no-one had the slightest idea what the book was about because where he was writing about the decadent downside of the American dream and the class system, the main thing people seemed to take away from it was the parties in the Roaring 20's were cool.
When he wrote Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury's idea was for it to show how the television boom was destroying interest in culture and literature but he was often told no it wasn't, it was all about government censorship.
The heavyweight Thus Spake Zarathustra by Friedrich Nitzsche had been used by Mussolini and Hitler to justify the idea of Superhumans but he was very anti the idea and his tome was a rallying cry against the very idea and on his death it was his sister who edited his work to mean the opposite and she happened to be a big fat Nazi.
Machiavelli's The Prince has many fans amongst tyrants and dictators but he was actually mocking them and their methods and Jack Kerouac's On the Road was a big hit with the Beatnik generation who took his travels across America as a life style instead of the unpleasant warning against an empty, hedonistic lifestyle as he planned leading to him to say that the Beatniks had turned his novel into something unrecognisable.
The Shining by Stephen King was about the dangers of alcoholism and Oedipus Rex by Sophocles is less about Oedipus wanting to sleep with his mother and kill his father and more about how he tried to evade a prophecy about his mother and father but ending up accidently killing him and marrying her anyway as fate decreed.
The most misunderstood book has to be Frankenstein by Mary Shelly which is a moral story about how men shouldn’t consider themselves Gods and how the monster who was actually a nice helpful and caring chap is hated and feared for being different and finally turns on the people he has been trying to form an attachment with, that and how everyone calls the Monster Frankenstein when it is actually the scientist who created him, the monster is just called Monster.