Tuesday 27 February 2007

You Should Never Come Back

Hollywood filmmaker James Cameron claims to have discovered the tomb of Jesus Christ which contains the remains of Mary Magdalene and possibly their son Judah.
Now if my shaky grip on Christianity is right, this is the second time the Lord has come out of retirement but this time he has bought the family with him.
Ask any veteran of the entertainment industry and they will tell you that you should never return once you have retired. In Jesus's case the first time, when he did the water-into-wine and the multiplying of the fishes things, he may have been cutting edge but David Blaine would knock him into a cocked hat these days.
In other news, the original basket used by the Easter Bunny has been discovered in a field by a Wisconsin Farmer and a tiny leather satchel with the initials TF etched on the side has been identified as the Tooth Fairy's. Big teethed children everywhere are being described as 'excited'.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

:~) Well said, lucy!

Anonymous said...

Mel Gibson must be SOOOOO jealous!

The Little Cheese said...

I heard that Christians are claiming it can't be The Big Guy and his Missus as 'Jesus was a common name'... so apparently, it is the equivalent of Darren and Sharon - but BC...

http://www.anorak.co.uk/features.php?features_id=171348&feature=James%20Cameron%5C's%20Jesus%20Goes%20Down%20Like%20The%20Titanic

The Intolerant One said...

Ohhhh puhhleeeeezzeee!!!!

What is with these kooks so desperate for a feel of the Christ? Go to church already.

I suppose these "Prophet diggers" were also capable of going back in time approx. 2,000 years ago to take a swab sample of the good Lord's mouth in order to confirm DNA analyisis of a pile of bones.

iMuslim said...

I was waiting for your response, TIO!

I made a similar remark about genotyping Jesus (peace be upon him) when my dad told me about the story this evening.

One minute they say he doesn't exist, the next they've found his tomb... glad to know the atheists are just united as us theists, haha.

iMuslim said...

The closing quote from this BBC News article, made me laugh:

Local residents told the BBC News website they were pleased with the attention the tomb has drawn.

"It will mean our house prices will go up because Christians will want to live here," one woman said.


WHY WOULD A CHRISTIAN WANT TO LIVE THERE?! D'OH!

Cheezy said...

I'm not a Christian but I still far prefer good old 'JC' to (ooh yuck) David Blaine!

At least there's a point to tricks like 'turning water into wine' (hooray!) and curing lepers and all that.

Whereas, what's the point of David Blaine? :-/

Falling on a bruise said...

Whereas, what's the point of David Blaine?
He acted as target practice for egg weidling Englanders when he hung about over the Thames in that transparent box.

Cheezy said...

I liked it when someone flew a remote control plane around the box... and suspended beneath it was a big, whiffy bag of Burger King :)

Daniel said...

The world is so desperate to believe in some other world, some afterlife.

This is sad really because, if they didn't, then we could concentrate on making this world a better place to live in for everyone during their short lifetime.

The assets owned by various religions, if sold off and the proceeds shared, would make us all millionaires.

Arthur_Vandelay said...

One minute they say he doesn't exist, the next they've found his tomb... glad to know the atheists are just united as us theists, haha.

Atheists find this whole thing just as amusing as you do, iMuslim.