Special Guest Blogger: William Miller

It is said that after his last visit was cut short, Jesus will come back however the exact time of his comeback is unknown but after miraculously surviving the War of Independence i began studying the Bible with fresh eyes and became especially interested in Daniel 8:14: 'Unto two thousand and three hundred days; then shall the sanctuary be cleansed' and i took that to mean that Earth was the sanctuary and Christ was returning to cleanse it, and i worked out that the 2300 days later meant that Big J would return between March 21, 1843 and March 21, 1844.
Now, i was aware that Christ’s return has been predicted many times before but i was so confident that i shared my prediction with the newspaper who dutifully began printing it because it was a quiet period of the 19th Century and the old timey newspapers were always short on material and America has never been short on people who are eager to see Christ's return.
I got inundated with questions and requests to travel and preach but America is a big place so i wrote a little book on my beliefs and sent a copy to anyone who got in touch including Joshua Vaughan Himes, a Preacher and newspaper publisher in Boston.
Himes was a full-fledged believer of my prediction and published them in his newspapers and arranged speaking tours and lectures to get the word out to as many people as possible that the son of God was due back circa Spring 1844.
Over a million Americans came to hear me speak and my theory was gaining traction and i even received letters from people in Europe who waited with baited breath as March 21 1843 came and went and when March 21 1844 also passed i pleased for patience and he will be here by April 18 1844, 100% absolutely guaranteed, no doubt, cross my heart and hope to die.
He never showed but happily i didn't die and instead slapped my head, said oh silly me i didn't count the leap years which makes it October 22 1844, sorry about that but and the big day came, believers gathered and waited, and waited, and waited, growing more and more anxious as darkness fell.
When day broke on October 23rd, they mumbled and went home or the ones who still had homes anyway because many of my believers had given away all their possessions because Jesus didn't care for such things and wanted to be spiritually prepared.  
I did try the line that Christ had returned but in spirit only and not in body but the newspapers were not buying it and labelled it the Great Disappointment and a year later, instead of him coming down to visit me a heart attack meant i went to see him in person and my first question was where was you then, you made me look a real divvy?
His answer was 'Last time i went there they crucified me, buggered if i'm going back down there again' which when you think about it, is perfectly fair.