Special Guest Blogger: Dave The Waiter At The Last Supper

So much for things being slow during Passover.
It was April of 33 and as usual Jerry's was jammed and I was coming to the end of an eight-hour double shift slopping kishke to drunken centurions and it was almost 9 and the kitchen wanted to close and in walks Jesus with his flock of hangers-on.
It was no bother to me, the chance to get a few extra shekels are always welcome and i see Luke, the skinny one with the greasy hair, comes over and says to me with a real snotty attitude, 'Table for thirteen ... I believe it's under Christ' so I check the book and i have one table left and show them over to it and then the arguments start because Matthew wants to sit next to Jesus but John is having none of it, Mark and James are pouting because what food is left is limited and mostly salad and Paul is saying he is lactose intolerant and wants t make sure there is no  cream in his borscht.
Judas sits glowering because no one will split an appetizer with him and Andrew actually snapped his fingers at me for a water refill, cheeky barstool.
I get extra if i can sell bottles of wine but the cheapskates only ordered one glass of house red, one glass, and they all split it the tightwads.
After I got them settled down, and started handing out the meals and you'd have thought we were feeding the lions the way they attacked it . I wanted to ask Jesus if he was planning some commandments on table manners but we got through dinner and Jesus was the only one who actually seemed pretty normal, being the son of God and a bit of a celebrity in these parts after all he did for the lepers you might expect him to be a bit of a git but he was actually pretty cool.
We were hoping for some miracles at the dinner table but he didn't do any of that although when I found out later that one of those guys had betrayed Jesus, it didn't surprise me a bit but let's face it, Messiahs come and go still I was sorry to hear what happened to Jesus. He was a good tipper.