Choosing The Next Pope

The Catholics are rubbing their rosary beads in excitement as all eyes are on the Vatican's chimney waiting for the white smoke to show that yet another old, white guy has been chosen to be the voice of God on Earth but i can't help think that the Catholics have missed an opportunity here. 
From what i can see, the only criteria to be the Pope is being old, male, Catholic and be able to cope with the heavy workload of walking to a balcony and waving a lot but instead of choosing someone nobody has ever heard of, the World is teeming with old male Catholics that would bring a bit of glamour to the role of the head primate. 
If the Cardinals had bothered to look at the big list of Catholics they could have offered the job to Dan Aykroyd, Alan Alda, any of the Baldwin, Nicholas Cage, Bono, Sean Connery, Bill Murray, Tom Hanks, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, Arnold Schwarzenegger or had a choice from the Sheen family although i might have had to have fitted an extra strength lock to the nuns quarters if Charlie accepted.
Mel Gibson is a Catholic as is David Hasselhoff although their communal wine bill would have probably bankrupt the Church but other options are Bruce Springsteen, Sylvester Stallone, Antonio Banderas, Billy Connolly, Johnny Rotton, Bob Geldof, Colin Farrell, Dave Grohl, David Boreanaz, Elvis Costello, Eminem, Engelbert Humperdinck, Fidel Castro, Harrison Ford, the Gallagher brothers, Liam Neeson, Michael Caine, Michael Flately, Mick Jagger, Nick Nolte and Sting.
Personally, i think there are two Catholics that the Vatican should be offering the funny hat to, George Clooney or Robert De Niro.
George because he would look damn cute and Robert De Niro because he made a fine Catholic priest in Sleepers and he would have lots of quotes from him movies to fall back on like 'You're a fu***ing criminal and you deserve to go where you're going and I'm gonna take you there and if I hear anymore s**t outta you. I'm gonna fu***ing bust your head and I'm gonna put you back in that fu***ing hole and I'm gonna stick your head in that fu***ing toilet bowl, and I'm gonna make it stay there'.
That would put the Archbishop of Canterbury off his steamed vegetables at the World Religions Summit.