Christmas is a time for goodwill to all men, presents beneath the Christmas tree and bright eyed children bouncing off the walls in anticipation of what the jolly fat man will bring them this year.
In all the excitement there are many pitfalls to navigate such as the office party. If you make it through that without being sacked or finding multiple copies of your photocopied derriere plastered on the notice board you have the secret santa where someone will take the chance to anonymously get back at the person who has spent the year annoying them. A can of anti-perspirant for that woman with the personal hygiene problem or a comb for the balding colleague.
The next test is to go about your shopping and to withstand the pushchairs being flung into the back of the legs, sharp elbowed shoppers attempting to nudge in front in queues and my new favourite, elderly woman who wait until their purchase has been rung up and bagged before beginning the drawn out process of looking for her purse in her handbag.
I hope that you all get what you want this Christmas and have a gay old time as the Flintstones say but don't forget about those that are not so well off this festive period, people like the bankers, Estate Agents and city workers god bless'em who are suffering more than most.
May all your dongs ding merrily.