Monday, 3 May 2010

Ark lark

You do have to have a degree of sympathy for the bible cradling religious folk today. Back in history it would have been much easier to believe in a God who created the universe and everything in it and is sat down somewhere weeding out the sinners and helping American athletes win at the Olympics.
As we progressed, the Copernicus and Darwin crowd gouged huge chunks out of the religious argument so now all the modern day believers have is a vain attempt to reinterpret the Bible and say actually, we never actually meant there was a Garden of Eden or men begetting children aged 864, it was all an analogy.
Weak argument i agree but occasionally they start jangling their rosary beads all excitedly because finally, they may have some evidence that it isn't all a load of nonsense.
This has happened once again this week with the announcement by a group of Christians that they were 99.9 percent sure they had found Noah's Ark.
In the story, God observed, in a kind and caring way obviously, that the earth was corrupted with violence and decided to destroy all life upon it. He chose the 600 year old Noah to build an ark and gather up the required animals before he unleashed death and destruction on the planet. Lovingly because God is love remember.
God decreed that 'the length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
A cubit is the distance between an adults elbow and tip of the finger, generally 18-inches. This means that the ark would have been 450 feet long, 75 feet wide and 45 feet high. Must have been pretty cramped for two of every unclean animal and 7 of every clean sort and all the food needed for 40 days and nights.
It turns out that like so many Ark discoveries before it, this particular find was a hoax but keep the faith religious types because one day, somebody may find that first scrap of evidence that backs up your argument.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

hanz,

i don't need your sympathy pal, you're post is insulting... vain - you mean like the evolutionists explaining that over time living things change (what a revelation) but then tripping over their dicks trying to explain how "nothing" evolved into amino acids isn't vain? or how newton was right about everything - oh except everything at the subatomic level - he got all of that wrong - isn't vain... how about the the brilliance of the big bang theory where scientists compare the universe to waves in a pond expanding outward - 5 year olds could have concluded that - but that isn't vain...

why don't you try to empathize some? imagine if you don't know about atoms, you don't know about anything further than 500 miles from where you are currently located, you've never seen a picture of the earth, you have no idea at all what a star is or that the sun is a star, you don't know about germs or DNA, you don't know how to make a flying machine and can't even imagine what a combustion engine is, then you get the book of Genesis or Revelation laid in your lap... now, you explain everything smartass!

in spite of arrogant, bitter-at-god-people (for obvious reasons) people like steven hawkings i've heard and read many phsysicists admit that they don't much... they just know more than people before them.

bottom line: people don't know shit from shinola, scientists are the just latest dumbasses...

it is stupid to interpret the bible literally in light of what we know today, but it is arrogant and shitty to constantly harp on the people that did they're best to interpret the bible using the data they had at the time.

q

Hanz said...

What i was alluding to in the first paragraph was the way that the religious message has gone from 'this is how it is, no argument' to 'actually, forget that, this is how it is, no argument' and it was science and a population able to access the bible and say 'hang about, how could that happen?' that made it alter it's position.

The Ghost of Richard Nixon said...

Never mind that overly-excited commenter, Hanz. The proof of god is contained in your very opening paragraph.

Of course god is working overtime to help Americans win gold at the olympics. After all, those Soviets are atheists.

Nixon approves of your rant.

Hanz said...

He is also saving the Queen so i wonder who would be priority if an American was about to start the 100m and the Queen was about to be attacked.