Your Honour, I appear on behalf of the Prosecution in this case against Mr S Claus, treading as Father Christmas of North Pole, Arctic Ocean.
First up i bring forward exhibit A, the very Sleigh that Mr Claus uses for his 36 hour long trip around the World which includes no safety features such as seat belts, airbags or crumple zones in direct violation of the Sleigh Health and Safety ruling. As Mr Claus is also fond of landing his heavily laden sleigh on rooftops, this causes undue worry to homeowners whose insurance policies are unlikely to cover an act of Santa. We are also considering as the reindeer are made to fly all night without a break, our concerns are around animal welfare laws.
Next there is the delicate extent of Mr Claus's indulgence in alcoholic substances during his trip where he consumes an unhealthy amount of spirits which leaves him unable to drive his sleigh in a coherent manner, we have evidence that on occasions it is actually the reindeer who operate the Sleigh.
As for arriving in peoples homes each year, it seems likely that Mr Claus is relying on some kind of implied consent to enter peoples residences to deliver presents but i would like it considered whether all parties involved in the transaction have fully understood what they are giving consent to and whether this tantamounts to trespassing.
The naughty and nice list is also to be considered under implied consent, the list is compiled and checked twice which is in direct violation of Data Protection Laws and essentially the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) for children's sensitive information as all those letters, addresses and details on who has been naughty and who has been nice.
Your honour, this is the case of the Prosecution against Mr S Claus and we request a cease and desist letters to be served on a Mr S. Claus, t/a Father Christmas while proceedings are underway.
With thanks to Lionel Hutz of Luvem and Burnem Family Law.
Sunday, 22 December 2024
Calling Mr. S. Claus To The Dock
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment