Special Guest Blogger: Terry Pratchett

I was called Britain's most shoplifted author which means one of two things, either my books were really expensive or the book shops always paraded them to close to the exit. I sold over 80 million books so a few walking out down the back of people's trousers never really affected me much.
I did start out with the idea of being an astronomer but i was no good at mathematics so decided instead to be a journalist where the only math's you need are to count if that's your 10th or 11th cup of coffee that day and got work at a local newspaper and one job was to interview a local publisher who i just happened to mentioned to that i was actually writing a book myself called The Carpet People, a novel about the trials and tribulations of different tribes and people living in a carpet and he asked to have a look. He did and was so impressed that he then passed it to his co-director.
They actually published it and i began writing the first Discworld novel and as the series became more and more successful, i gave up my job making up writing about other people to become a full-time writer of the Discworld novels.
All the Discworld novels take place on a flat, circular world which sits on the back of four elephants, which stand on the back of a giant star turtle and despite how that sounds they were wildly successful, i was even knighted for services to literature and decided that if i was to be a knight, i needed a proper sword so i gathered deposits of iron i found in a field near my home in Wiltshire and smelted it myself.
Over 55 million sales Worldwide and 39 books into the series later i was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s but i wasn't going to let a small thing like Alzheimer stop me although part of my condition was my eyesight failing so i used computer dictation software for Discworld 40 and 41 and a few other books and there was a rumour going around after i had what i described as a strange experience that i had found God.
I said it may be possible that once you have got past all the gods that we have created with big beards and human traits there may be an ordered structure to things but as for finding God, it's unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my own keys.
I wasn't afraid of dying, i even created a Death personification in Discworld who loves cats, curries, rides a horse named Binky and only talks in CAPS but it wasn't him who came for me that March morning when i died peacefully at home with my family around me and my pet cat asleep on my bed, as i took my final breath the cat raised it's head and looked at me as if to say so who's going to sort out my tea now then.