Up and down the length of the country, the English did their bit for Global warming tonight by lighting huge fires and setting off million of tonnes of gunpowder.
Guy Fawkes was the original terrorist but it is quite possible he was nowhere near the House of Lords and was fitted up by the Metropolitan Police after being wrongly trailed from a block of hovels.
The fear of further terrorist outrages allowed the government of the day to curtail civil liberties, stir up religious hatred and bring in draconian measures, a knee jerk reaction that is hard for us to imagine happening with our Governments today. ID Card anyone?
King James I decreed that "The discovery of this fiendish plot shall be celebrated evermore," although i don't think he had teenagers chucking bangers at passing buses in mind when he said it.
In order to halt said younger teenagers setting up mini explosions in the doorway of Woolworths at 1am, they banned the sale of fireworks to under-18s which is very responsible of our government to want to keep us safe from exploding things that cause harm.
Of course any teenager with a particular hunger for blowing things up could alternatively visit one of the arms fairs we hold regularly and buy rockets, ground-to-air missiles or helicopter gunships. That would get the net curtains twitching.