Actually my name isn't Hanz at all despite what it says on the left so that's a lie straight off the bat but it makes me sound exotic like a German or a Dane or something rather than a common or garden Englishman so i'm going to go with it.
Having genitals of the dangly variety, i am prone to wildly swinging moods which will be evident here as i go from how lovely daffodils are to oh my God, we are all doomed and back again in the space of the same post as well as forgetting what i am talking about and ending up talking about the complete opposite to what i started on.
It does seem that the majority of bloggers are American which is unfortunate because now that the Commons Foreign Affairs committee has called an end to the special relationship us British and Americans once had, i guess i will have to do the ex- thing to you.
Firstly it's your fault, secondly we always preferred Canada and thirdly France has been flirting with us lately and they have that cute accent so there.
We want our things back and don't come creeping around again next time you elect a President that starts wars he cannot finish.
That's it, all over. At least until we get drunk and send you an embarrassing text saying that we do love you and our lives are empty without your big, throbbing F-14's landing on our eager runway.
Anyway, i'm Hanz. Or rather i'm not and i will be your host.