Friday, 12 October 2012

Gonna' Need A Bigger Hall

The weekends here and we all have things to do and places to go. I suppose i had better get my hair done and i'm going to need a new dress and shoes if me and 500 million of my closest friends are going to an International awards ceremony.
Being British, you won't catch us boasting about the Nobel Peace Prize that we have picked up today as part of the EU which was given the award for its 'contribution to the advancement of peace and reconciliation, democracy and human rights in Europe'.
I doubt if we will ever mention it again, just put it on the hypothetical European shelf and let it collect dust.
Of course we wouldn't be so shallow as to shove it in the face of the Australasians while shouting 'let's count how many Nobel Peace Prizes we got between us shall we? Us first, ONE, your go'.
The countries that make up North America won't be hearing us sing 'Put down your French Fries and look at our Peace Prize' and there is absolutely no chance that the South American nations will witness the undignified sight of 500 million Europeans mockingly waving miniature peace prizes at it.
African's can rest assured that we won't be bringing it up at every opportunity, i doubt it will even be mentioned again.
Two things puzzle me though, where are they going to get a hall large enough to hold all 500 million of us and secondly, do we get an official title or can i just insist that everyone calls me 'her distinguished majesty of everything and everybody'?
I have an idea, let's count how many Peace Prizes we have between us shall we Australians. We have one, how many have you got?
Pardon? You haven't? Oh. Snigger.


Anonymous said...

it didn't go to you... i heard it went to the ewe.


Lucy said...

I'm sure when i woke up this morning i was one of the 500 million people in the EU.

Anonymous said...

not the people, the EU, it is a way for them to keep the money...


Lucy said...

From the Guardian:

José Manuel Barroso, head of the European commission, tweeted that the prize had been awarded to all 500 million EU citizens.

I'm going to get a chain put through mine and wear it as an attractive bracelet.

Anonymous said...

well, if it was in the press then it must be true and correct.

the ambassador killing in libya was a just a rave party gone out of control - everybody takes rockets to a party.


david g said...

Yeah, Obama has a Peace Prize too. In four years he's managed to kill millions yet he hasn't given his prize back.

Of course he got assistance from the E.U. via NATO, especially from the British who are always there when slaughtering and destroying need to be done!

Like the Americans, they can't get enough of it.

Then as Orwell said: PEACE IS WAR!

Lucy said...

The British are always involved when a scrap is brewing, our leaders still hark back to those Empire days.

Cheezy said...

"In four years he's managed to kill millions"

You know how, when you're in your maths class, the teacher puts 'Show your working' next to what you've done? That's so they know how you've come to your answer? Well, in the same spirit, I'd like to see a few statistics here, showing how Obama has 'killed millions'.

Otherwise this comment has to be filed alongside all your others, in a folder marked 'meaningless'....