Eurovision Week 2015

With an audience of over 200 million, the Eurovision song contest is quite right to call itself the 'Worlds Largest Party' and this year the spangly invite has gone out to Australia to join in.
Not exactly a hotbed of musical talent, Australia may seem a strange choice but it turnes out that Eurovision is massively popular in Australia and has been broadcast annually to the country probably farthest away from Europe for the past 30 years.
The Eurovision purists don't like it, the cheers when Israel get knocked out in the semi-final are loud enough, and rather than pollute ours with their Aussie twang they should start their own song contest with New Zealand and the Soloman Islands if they like it so much but i have heard the Australian entry and believe me, it isn't going to be troubling the leaders side of the board.
To make sure Australia doesn't send it's representative all the way to Vienna only to be turfed out at the first opportunity, it has been given an automatic bye to Saturdays final along with Austria, UK, Italy, Germany, Spain and France.
Although their will not be any bearded men wearing full make up and evening dress competing this year, Finland has sent a band of downs syndrome men playing a god awful heavy metal tune who will either win it or get thrown out on their ear in the first semi-final on Tuesday but i have high hopes for the UK's entry this year.
Instead of the usual dross wrapped up in a well known singer, we have put our hope in Mick Jagger impersonator and a very shiny faced lady who nobody turned for in The Voice singing a 1920's style electro swing number.
May as well hand us the trophy now because that has winner written all over it!