Boris And The Dossier

So did the habitual liar tell lies to the House of Commons? His 'evidence' should prove it one way or the other so let's have a look at the dossier that he handed in to the Investigation Committee

I, Boris Johnson, do solemnly declare that this dossier shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God although with my record i will not be seeing him. Marriage vows and all that.
The charge is that i deliberately misled parliament about there being no parties or illegal gatherings in Downing St which is categorically untrue as i said that i had no knowledge of any parties or if the parties that i did go on were illegal. Even though it had been me who had brought in the Covid legislation that had banned them but i knew nothing about any parties, except for the ones I went to which weren't even parties.
All the parties I attended were work events and the ones i was photographed at was just me popping downstairs to make sure that it was a not-party and therefore allowed under my own rules and then i went back up to my flat.
As for the Birthday Party Carrie arranged where i supposedly said: 'This is the most unsocially distanced party in the country', nobody could hear anything over the karaoke which was going all night so i could have said anything and nobody would have heard it.
In Summary, i never did anything wrong and i never lied about it but just in case you have some evidence i did, i would like to play the two negatives equal a positive card meaning two lies equal the truth.

Boris