British Bake Off For Americans

As we know, we handed the American's a structured English language and the first thing they did was mangle it by taking out the letter U and making up silly words for things which already had perfectly good names so you get all the confusion over Crisps, Chips, Gas, Pants and don't even get me started on Fanny but i didn't know that America now gets The Great British Bake Off and nobody on that side of the Atlantic Ocean really knows what any of the desserts are.
The differences between what British people and Americans mean by pudding and biscuit i was vaguely aware of but a British pudding can also be black, steak and kidney, rice, a crumble, Pease, Figgy, Treacle, sticky toffee or even a Roly Poly so not that straight forward.
A biscuit is even more complicated with it being a Wagon Wheel, Malted Milk, Jammie Dodger, Party Ring, Bourbons, Ginger Nuts, Rich Tea, Digestive, Chocolate Chip, Custard Cream or even a Hobnob and some of which may be half covered in chocolate.
Apparently Americans eat biscuits with gravy so heaven knows what the hell that is unless gravy is another word for custard but even that is weird but it seems that everything is called something different so our cookery books refer to aubergines, mangetouts, courgettes, coriander and sultana's while the
Americans will call them eggplants, snow peas, zucchini, cilantro and golden raisins.
So if you hear Paul Hollywood or Pru Leith refer to toffee then think caramel, a traybake is a bar cookie, granola bar is a flapjack, pancake is a crepe but apparently Americans don't even have trifle, Eton mess or banoffee pie so if you are not accustomed to the UK palate then then you should stay well away from bubble and squeak, clotted cream, squashed fly cake, Lardy Cake, Wet Nelly and Dumplings and a Spotted Dick should be avoided at all times.