Special Guest Blogger: Bethlehem Inn Keeper

There are no songs sang by Christians about me centuries later and my only line said by children with tea-towels wrapped around their heads in school plays is to say that there is no room in my inn but i played a pivotal role in the whole nativity thing.
Sure, if i had known that the man with the knackered looking donkey and the heavily pregnant wife banging on my door was carrying the son of God then i i would have found them a room but i set the whole thing in motion by letting them rent my stable and creating the second worst role after the shepherds in any children's Christmas play.
I did check on them later in the evening and everything seemed fine, there was some miffed off cows and pigs stood around as the boyfriend had emptied out the manger to use as a bed for their baby once it was born and for those who don’t know, a manger is somewhere where food for farm animals is kept.
That Mary and Joseph planned to placed their newborn baby, believed to be the saviour of mankind, in a container that animals eat out of, in front of the animals that usually eat out of it, at this point you have to wonder whether God almighty, in all his infinite wisdom, had chosen wisely when selecting potential parents.
My first inkling something was going on was when i nipped outside around midnight and saw a gathering of people outside the stable and a brightly lit host of angels above it and i said to the wife that looks important.
They did clean up the place before they left and before Herod's guys came looking for their baby but as i explained to them, their plan of killing as many babies as possible in the hope that one of them was Jesus was not a winner.
One, there are a lot of babies in the world, Two, the wholesale murdering of babies is the kind of thing that God tends to frown upon, and Three, Jesus is Jesus and therefore very difficult to kill, even in baby form.
They hauled me off for questioning for violating all sorts of health and safety protocols but i'd do it again only this time i might throw in a few more lines of dialogue to build my part up a bit.