Special Guest Blogger: The Ghost of Christmas Future

Like most stingy people, you are probably constantly threatened by the thought of ghosts appearing in the middle of the night and screaming dire warnings of pain and misfortune that you will soon suffer as a result of all your morally dubious acts.
Due to fluctuations in the Spiritual Space Time Continuum, the barrier between our planes is always weakest during the holiday season, and not a Christmas goes by without someone being visited by ghosts, eager to show them the error of their ways and i'm normally the last one if the other two don't have any success and you are still wavering between being a proper person keen to now become the epitome of human kindness or remaining a tosser.
The Ghost of Christmas Past is, in my opinion a bit of a waste of ectoplasm, him showing you visions of things in the hope that this flood of  information will influence your behavior by showing you only things that have already happened in order to give you a chance to save yourself from the wretched path you are on won't work, you know what happened and you still became a horrible git.
The Ghost of Christmas Present shows you all the fun other people are having talking about you behind your back but humans beings, they just either sack them the first day they are back at work if they are the boss or just act even snottier to them.
I, The Ghost of Christmas Future, the one with the shroud and skeletal appearance, my job is to try to show you how much the world hates you when you're gone, even though it frankly makes less sense when coming from the future. When you're gone, you're gone, and if people want to slag you off or high-five at your funeral, let them. All that matters to you is that you lived like a king, sleeping on a mattress stuffed with tens and twenties.
The smart ones even take the opportunity, to find out who won the next 20 FA Cup's or Grand National's although i do enjoy my little joke when they ask how far in the future and i look at my watch and pretend to count hours. That one always freaks them out.
To be fair, my job is probably the easiest of the three, my main ploy is to just take them to the graveyard and show them their graves and point quite a bit and i do resemble the Grim Reaper, we are related and i stand in for him sometimes when things get busy, but mostly it's the standard be nice or when you will die people will be cheering but as i say, it's no bother to me, i'm dead and i got a job so knock yourself out for all i care, it keeps me employed.