Sunday, 13 September 2009

The Christian Party

While googling for the British Christian Party, i came across this doozy of the same name.
It's main concern is the 19th Amendment to the American Constitution, or to everyone else, the bit where it says 'The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex.'
Apparently, this particular Christian Party are campaigning to get it repealed and quote God himself saying that he would 'greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children' as proof that even the big man upstairs thinks women are a bit on the dodgy side.
It then goes to dedicate the movement to every woman who voted to send men to Korea, Vietnam, Kuwait, and Iraq, exercising authority over a man in violation of God's Law'.
Apparently it all comes down to men having three and a half billion more brain cells than a woman.
So because of this lack of grey matter, it is dangerous to give American women the vote because they constitute 11% more of the voters than men, so are directly responsible for who gets elected and as us women are such dumb asses, proves that 'the American woman can't be trusted as a responsible citizen, much less as an educated voter'.
To push the point that men are superior, the site offers such facts as:

Women are perpetrators of up to 60% of "domestic violence"
Less than 0.1% of Americans follow women's soccer.
A mother's involvement in her child's education reduces academic skills by 28-32%.
Granting women legal rights precipitated a fifty fold increase in the US divorce rate.
The increased divorce rate led directly to a ten fold increase in the murder rate.
American men commit suicide at a rate five times higher than American women

Can't argue with those stats, mostly because i just don't have the mental capacity to, being a woman and all and my mother helped me with my homework a few times. The site has to be an attempt at satire. Doesn't it?


CP said...

Thank you for visiting the site Lucy. All the stats used are based on scientific research and studies and the words of our creator which i have linked to and prove conclusively that feminism and the rise of womens rights are to blame for the majority of societies ills.

Cody Bones said...

"American men commit suicide at a rate five times higher than American women"

Did anyone consider that American women might be the cause?

Just asking

Anonymous said...


this post hits on three main points:

1.) there are liars, damn liars, and statisticians...
2.) when you have 300 million people (USA pop) you have some nuts...
3.) nuts use statistics to substantiate their nuttiness...


Anonymous said...


i should note that all three of my prior points were substantiated by a survey where 99% of americans polled agreed with me...


Lucy said...

Pesky women and our wish to be treated as equals CP. Damn those missing few billion brain cells and our inabilty to vote the right way. I'd put us all in a big hole and fill it in.

Maybe Cody, you are just better at it than us. We probably miss or get distracted by the ironing pile.

A quick survey here found that 100% of people called Lucy in this room though CP was probably single.

Cheezy said...

"All the stats used are based on scientific research and studies and the words of our creator"

CP is not only a satirist, Lucy, he's a damn good one!

Lucy said...

Yes, CP is so good anyone would think he meant it. Anyone with the correct amount of brain cells that is anyway which counts me out.