How To Build A Scientifically Perfect Snowman

Traditionally the coldest week in the UK is between the 8th and 16 February but the most likely period for snow is between 24 January and 25 February so the snow forecast for this weekend is a few weeks early.
The MET Office have issued yellow warnings (meaning it is likely to happen) for snow for most of the UK from Friday evening to Monday morning with temperatures around 5C below the 7C average which means its going to pretty nippy out there including here on the South Coast where we generally miss out on the white stuff.    
As the temperature outside drops and snow layers the streets you may find yourself tempted to run outside and build yourself a snowman but not so fast because science has studied snowman building and can tell us how to build a perfect one.
First, so say the scientists with way too much time on their hands, you have to decide where to put your snowman and somewhere in shade is preferable so it doesn't melt too quickly.
Next, make sure you’ve got the right kind of snow so you want between 3%-8% moisture so the snow sticks and doesn't just fall apart when you shove a carrot in it's face although how you can guess the moisture of snow is anybodies guess.
So you got the right place and the correct moisture of snow so you need to roll three snowballs, one of 30cm (11.8 inches) for the head, one 50cm (19.6 inches) for the upper body and the last one of 80cm (31.4 inches) for a perfectly proportioned and stable height of exactly 160 cm (5' 2") which is the standard height for a snowman apparently.
Happy with your hard work it is now time for the finishing flourish with branches in his sides for arms, wrap a scarf around his neck and plonk a hat on his head and add three buttons equally spaced for the snowman’s chest, a carrot nose and more buttons for eyes.
Obviously if you have an enchanted silk hat knocking about then use that and enjoy the laughing and playing before he melts away otherwise you will have to do with a stationery, but a scientifically perfectly built  snowman.
Finally, a word of advice, snow is very cold so before you say 'Duh, obviously Lucy', it is easy to forget that when you are out in the stuff and making snowmen and snowballs so make sure you wear gloves or take a break when your fingers are numb and going a funny blue colour and one more thing, snow is pretty heavy so aim that snowball at your brother/sister/neighbour a bit higher for a decent head shot.