Sunday, 16 August 2015

Where Was That F**cking Place Again?

Not for the first time, it seems us English speakers have upset the Austrians, or rather one city in particular.
It seems we have been snickering, amongst other things, at their town name, the gloriously named City of F*CKING.
The Major of F*CKING has been ranting about English-speaking tourists acting out their village's name beneath the sign at the entrance to the town.
First up to defend us as usual is the Germans, with the top knob in the Town of W*NK saying that the F*CKING Major has got it wrong and he should be grabbing the opportunity with both hands as they do in W*NK.
'We have so many visitors coming to W*nk' he explained, 'In summer visitors can take hikes up W**k Mountain, or take it easy in the four seater W*nk cable car that goes all the way to the peak.'
Local tourism chiefs say they realised that their name was a goldmine when it came to attracting English-speaking visitors and sell plenty of W*NK postcards, W*NK sweets and ornaments to show their friends and family of the time they came to W*NK.
A favourite is the photographer who for a small fee will take your picture beside the 'Welcome to W*nk signs.'
The F*CKING Major is not taking the advice of the W*NK's though and is determined to crack down on disrespectful visitors by installing CCTV to deter tourists from lewd behaviour beside their roadsigns.
'We don't find it funny and just want to be left alone' he grumbled so remember that next time you are in central Europe, you are more than welcome to W*NK but make sure you stop before F*CKING.

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