My grandfather was the King of Lothian and my mother was a princess but when she got pregnant with me out of wedlock, my grandfather being as grumpy and cantankerous as basically everything else Scottish, threw her off the top of a hill but rather than killing her and her unborn child, she survived so he put her into a coracle and pushed it out to sea.
Rubbing his hands together and saying 'job done', she drifted across the Firth of Forth to Culross in Fife and months later little old me came screeching into the World.
The Picts were not the most hospitable people, even the Romans decided against taking them on and instead built a wall to keep them in so my Church was not the most popular place despite me once restoring life to a robin that had been killed by some of my classmates but eventually the horde of ginger bearded maniacs armed with swords made me an offer i couldn't refuse, not if i wanted to keep the top half of my body in the same postal area as the lower part i couldn't anyway, so i moved to Wales where i met up with Saint David for a while until i was invited back to Scotland where i performed the miracle that i am most well known for.
The Queen Languoreth of Strathclyde was suspected of infidelity by her husband, King Riderch, who demanded to see her wedding ring, which he heard she had given to her lover but in reality the King had sneakily thrown it into the River Clyde.
Faced with execution she appealed to me for help and i ordered a messenger to catch a fish in the river. On opening the fish, with a flourish and a shout of 'TA-DA' produced the ring from inside the fish, a bit like when your uncle produces a coin from behind your ear but anyway it allowed the Queen to clear her name and keep her head off a pike.
There was also a miracle about a fire going out and i got it going again but the fish one is much more cooler.
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