Friday, 12 February 2016

BYOB

If i ran a clinic that specialised in penis enlargement operations the most obvious place to open a clinic would be next to a gun range.
This time of year is especially difficult for men who say things like 'Guns don’t kill people' and 'Without my gun the King of England could just come into my house' because they are obviously crackers and have a very good chance of being single.   
So what is a single gun nut with a tiny willy going to do this St Valentines Day when love is all around? Shoot cute things obviously.  
A Texan gun range is offering a special promotion where Cletus, Bobby Joe and Billy Bob can turn up in their pick up truck and take out all that pent up aggression about women avoiding them like Australians avoid alcohol free beer by shooting at teddy bears.
After last years successful campaign, the Boyert Shooting Range is running another promotion which allows distraught lovers to shoot either their own teddy bears or choose a new bear to blast.
'I’m a single guy and it gives me a chance to let loose a little bit' slurred one man who saw his already nil chances of finding love plummet by going on television to announce he will spend Valentines Day blasting teddy bears and condemning himself to spending every February 14th wondering why nobody wants him.
When the only thing smaller than your chances of finding love is your genitalia, go shoot some teddy bears.

2 comments:

Keep Life Simple said...

Lucy, are you mixing up your meds?

Falling on a bruise said...

Someone is it seems.