Tuesday, 2 August 2016

Jesus Redux

It is said that after his last visit was cut short, Jesus will come back however, the exact time of his comeback is unknown. Mark 13:32 says: 'That day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father' but now we do know because not only is he living in Burnley but he has been trundling a bus around the city for the past 30 years.
John Edward Birtwhistle is now running for the Member of Parliament for Burnley on the basis that he was the son of God in a past life.
So with all that happening in the World, what is Jesus trying to accomplish this time around? An end to famine maybe or World Peace or perhaps he just wants us all to love each other more?
The son of God's manifesto includes weekly bin collections, free bus passes for the over-60s, scrapping the TV licence and children being taught at home by their parents.
He says he remembers being Jesus Christ in a past life, with memories coming back to him in dreams.
'Two thousand years ago I went against the government. I told them who I was, what I was there for and that the people were going to have a better life. They got rid of me because I went against the government. They crucified me. I’m hoping by 2020 I’ll be in a position to stand'.
Lucky, lucky Burnley.

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