The youngest of ten children, when i was 8 my parents placed me in the care of a Benedictine nun and not long after i began to experience visions and wrote them down and the nuns were so impressed that they made me the Superior but our little church got so popular, especially as i was very handy with the herbs and medicinal arts that we had to move to a new, bigger convent.
The Abbot assigned a monk to document everything i saw and the Pope himself got wind of it and my fame began to spread all throughout Europe and people traveled near and far to hear of my visions and seek help, especially men who seemed particularity afflicted with phlegm and we all know why, a certain man in a certain garden eating a certain forbidden fruit. Just saying if man had remained in paradise, he would not have had the flegmata within his body which introduces infirmities to the human body.
12th Century Medicine was particularly advanced, i knew all about the stones found in the gizzards of swallows hung around the patients neck cured epileptics, insanity and lunatic patients and mandrake root left in a spring for a day and then prayed over cured depression and for men experiencing problems with their testicles, they should burn a swallow’s egg in its shell, grind it to a powder, add some chicken fat, and mix until a paste and rub into their testicles.
It was about this time that i began composing my songs, you may have heard of 'Ordo virtutum' which was the very first Opera and a popular little ditty i knocked out and Pope Benedict XVI gave me the name Doctor of the Church which is pretty cool name although the rock n roll lifetyle caught up with me during
a four date hymn and anthem tour of Europe and i was found dead in my bed aged 81.
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