Monday, 17 August 2009

British Medals For British Athletes

I always think that us Brits cheat when it comes to events like the World Athletics Championships.
Rather than compete as England or Wales, we lump 4 countries together and call it team GB or something which seems unfair on everyone else. That said, we still suck so nobody kicks up too much of a fuss.
Maybe if we could ditch Ireland, Wales and Scotland and choose 3 other countries to pal up with we would do much better.
Before the events even began we knew that the Caribbean countries would clean up in the short distance sprinting while the Africans would leave us panting in their wake in the long distance.
The East Europeans would snatch up the medals in the throwing events which just leaves us scrambling over the events where you have to run and jump.
As we proved at the Olympics, us Brits only excel at the events where you can sit down at the same time so we got the golds at cycling and rowing events.
All this doesn't bode well for us at our own London Olympics in 2012 but i had a brainwave while watching the BNP thugs in action over the weekend.
For three weeks only, we should take a leaf out of the BNP book but instead of British jobs for British workers, British medals for British athletes.
Every British athlete gets first choice of medal that he or she wants and whatever is left, the rest can share out among themselves.
If we can start a campaign now, highlighting the frightening prospect of foreign athletes, coming over here and taking all our medals, in stadiums that the hard working British worker have paid for with their tax contributions, we could clean up.
I'm sure we could bring David Cameron into the fold, he isn't one to miss jumping with abandon onto any bandwagon that happens to be trundling past him and as a right winger, well, you expect him to come up with ludicrous ideas anyway and this is as ludicrous as it gets.
British medals for British's the only way.


Cheezy said...

"As we proved at the Olympics, us Brits only excel at the events where you can sit down at the same time so we got the golds at cycling and rowing events."

This is the lame criticism that Kiwis had to endure from Aussies, after New Zealand had won more gold medals in the 1984 Olympics than our bigger, emptier neighbour (yes, it seems like a long time ago now)... A lot of NZ's success in the Los Angeles Games was in 'seated' events like rowing, kayaking, sailing, equestrian, that sort of thing... To which, our reply to the Aussies was: "Yaa boo sucks to you. You're just jealous".

"All this doesn't bode well for us at our own London Olympics in 2012..."

Good grief, there's no pleasing some people... Beijing was Britain's most successful Olympics for exactly a century; they finished 4th in the medal table, a position they'd previously targeted for London 2012... I know there's a certain type of English person who derives more pleasure from heroic defeat than they do from I'm-pissing-all-over-you-victory, but the last Olympics wasn't exactly a miserable failure, whichever way you slice it...

Lucy said...

This post probably reads better in my head than someone else's.
It was supposed to a twist on the nonsense spat out by the BNP ie everythings crap and its all the fault of the foreigners coming here and taking our jobs/houses.
I just swapped Team GB for Britain and medals for jobs/houses as the World Championship is on at the moment and it seemed current.

Nog said...


Texas vs. America? I guess America still needs us.

Cheezy said...

No, your point (really was) taken, Lucy! But equally there really are people around who need no excuse to moan about a lack of British success, even when they're doing very well.

Nog: I think we call our Texas, 'Cornwall' :-)

Lucy said...

I know that there are that kind around Cheezy and not just with sport but with everything but i do think the British way of playing down our achievements does come into play with that. That doesn't seem to concern Man Utd fans though i notice.

Anonymous said...


can you shoot darts while seated?


Lucy said...

As most people play it after a gallon of lager, i imagine it can be played in any position Q.

Cheezy said...

I think the term is 'throwing' darts, Q! :)

And yes, you can cos I have :)

Lucy said...

It did make me smile but after our recent discussions on gun laws, i didn't want to draw attention to Q's use of the word shoot.

Anonymous said...


I actually knew the proper word is 'throwing' but I was trying to get a response from Cheezy ;-)