Special Guest Blogger: Muhammad

Being a prophet is not very well paid, you get the rewards but they are all after you die which is great in some ways but not so good in others so i was a rug salesman in Mecca before i got all holy and began a religion.
The first step was a stroke of luck, the famous Black Stone had been removed from the wall of Kaaba during renovations and to mark its return to its rightful place, the clan leaders decided to ask the next man who came through the gate to replace it so i strolled in with a rug under my arm at just the right moment and i was asked to pick it up and pop it back into place.
Feeling i was one of the Holy gang now, i shut myself in a cave for several nights of prayer but i was constantly interrupted by Archangel Gabriel of all people who began telling me stuff about God so i went outside and told the people what i had heard about God's final judgment, Hell and Paradise, asking for forgiveness, remember to face Mecca while praying, all that sort of thing.
To be honest in the beginning not many people stayed around to listen to me but i persevered and slowly we got up quite a decent number, enough that the other religions in Mecca tried to ban us so we all shuffled off to Medina and united most of their tribes to our cause.
After eight years and plenty of more visits from Gabriel who kept handing out the revelations like sweets, i put them all together into a book called the Koran and gathered an army of 10,000 Muslim converts and marched on the city of Mecca but i laid out some pretty progressive rules of warfare such as no killing of women, children or innocents, no burning of trees and orchards and no destruction of wells but despite all the restrictions, we still took the city and started the whole Muslim movement thing which would sweep the World.
A few months after, i fell ill and suffered for several days with fever, head pain, and weakness and died in the arms of the favourite of my 13 wives, Aisha.
I know Muslim and Christians have never really got along although there are many similarities such as we both big up Jesus. Obviously, Muslims don't worship Jesus as our messiah, that would essentially make us Christians, but we have Jesus, or Isa as we call him, as a prophet like me, but to us Isa is not either God himself or his son, just one of Gods messengers but he will lead God's armies at the end of the world, killing Masih ad-Dajjal who is the Islamic version of the antichrist.
So we are not so different and we should be more tolerant and understanding of each others religion...ok, maybe not Scientology because that religion is just plum crazy but the rest of us should be able to get along.