It was often said that i had a drink problem but i didn't think so, i'd drink, get drunk and do stupid things like spout lines from King Lear when i was in Macbeth so no problem but people expected that from me and it was in my genes.
When i was still a baby, my father packed up the family and took us on a five year tour of racecourses until the German fokkers headed our way and i was sent to to the country to a Catholic school with lots of praying and scary nuns so i decided to embrace sin for all its worth with a stripper called Bubble LaRue and what a talented and flexible woman she was!
I worked for Yorkshire Evening Post newspaper for a while until i was fired and then wandered into theatre work and found i had a talent for Shakespearean acting.
I met my future wife, Sian Phillips, who was as mad as me, on one occasion i threw all her clothes out the window so she started wearing my clothes.
Problem was i was developing a stonking drink habit, she was teetotal so she didn't even have that excuse although she did enjoy the ride because i was the next big thing, as my role as T.E. Lawrence in the Lawrence of Arabia film.
Two years filming that was and i had to learn how to ride a camel, taught myself basic Arabic, lived in a Bedouin tent and i was told to keep myself in good shape but i said 'The only exercise i take is walking behind the coffins of friends who took exercise' and my co-star was Omar Sharif, or Cairo Fred as i called him although i didn't get on so well with Alec Guiness, after i came back drunk from a local tavern he said 'You could have been killed and i’m beginning to think it’s a pity you wasn’t'.
Most people will be overly forgiving of people we admire, particularly us celebrities because a high-profile movie star will be forgiven any indiscretion the instant he makes a movie we like and that film made me famous and ooddles of money and women, i made a bet that i could bed Anita Ekberg, Jayne Mansfield, and Diana Dors and i walked away with the winnings but the most impressive notch on my bedpost was a real life Princess, the Queens sister Margaret.
I was big drinking buddies with Richard Burton but even closer to his wife Elizabeth Taylor until she forbade Burton from drinking with me, it was around that time my wife left me but i began dating Trudie Styler who went on to lower her standards by marrying Sting.
I mostly had no idea what i was doing but i know did it really, really well but the drinking took its toll and i had to have my pancreas and some of my stomach removed because of cancer and diabetes and soon afterwards it was my coffin the friends were getting their exercise by walking behind.
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