I was the guy who had the misfortune of wearing the funny hat during World War II and was accussed of being a Jew hater despite the Church and the Jews going way back, our founder was Jewish for cripes sake! It was hard to be called 'Hitlers Pope' just because i refused to condemn him during World War 2 but that was mainly because i was 'accidentally' mislabelling Jews as Catholics and issuing them travel visas and as Hitler was a bit murdery and because he was crazy, not stupid, or not that stupid, i wanted to keep him sweet to carry on issuing travel visas to Catholics (aka Jews) in Nazi territories.
If i had publicly spoken out against the Holocaust then Catholics would have had such an easy time getting out of Germany so i had to convince the world, but mostly Hitler, that i had no beef with his plans.
As if that wasn't enough, i also had the Jews screaming at me for trying to convert them to Christianity but i couldn't scream 'SHUT UP, I'M SAVING YOUR LIFE IDIOT' as nothing bring you to the attention of a Nazi then to have a Jew causing a scene.
I did attempt a long-distance exorcism on Hitler, but it unfortunately failed so tried for an assasination attempt instead, teaming up with some in the German military intelligence but the fact that there was a queue for trying to kill Hitler at that time doomed the plot, the SS found out about it and ordered me killed but fortunately for me before they got around to it Hitler was laying dead in a ditch somewhere and his once favourite Pope was free to carry on talking up the big guy and his 14 year old baby's momma.
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