In his New Year address, North Korea's leader Kim Jong-un has said: 'a nuclear button is always on my desk' which is just showing off.
On my desk is a monitor and keyboard with a stuck shift key, a coffee mug desperately in need of a wash, a half eaten bag of Maltesers, a snowglobe with sticky chocolate fingerprints on it and bits of paper with important looking numbers on them which i have no idea what they are for.
To be fair i am not a World leader but we do know that the American President also has a red button on his desk but rather than start nulcear winter, it orders a glass of Coca-Cola because it is thirsty work being President and each glass is another step towards even more morbid obesity and Type 2 diabetes so here's hoping he makes ample use of it.
When he wasn't threatening to turn America into a nuclear wasteland, Mr Kim was offering a potential olive branch to South Korea, suggesting he was 'open to dialogue' and how he may even send a team to the Winter Olympics in Seoul.
'We should melt the frozen North-South relations, thus adorning this meaningful year as a year to be specially recorded in the history of the nation' he said with the South Korean president replying their office had always stated our willingness to talk with North Korea at anytime and anywhere.
Good start to the year, reconciliation on the Korean peninsula and i have half a bag of Maltesers left now if i can just find a way to type with having to use the shift key.