To most Brits General Lee was the name of the car in The Dukes of Hazard but a Commander had to be spectacular to get his name slapped on the side of a moonshine running Dodge Charger a century later and i was spectacular, a badass to end all badasses. It takes someone special to lead an entire region of their country that has decided to rebel when the President said they couldn't buy and sell black people anymore and the South's campaign wasn't a success for no reason, it wasn't a success for quite a few reasons.
One was the horrific dysentery and diarrhea we suffered, the whole concept of not drinking or bathing in your own toilet water was a medical innovation that would come along much too late to help and then there was some window shakingly stupid strategies that cost the lives of thousands of men, like when i ordered 12,000 soldiers across an open field and into the loving arms of the rifle firing Union soldiers, getting half of them killed on the spot and getting the shit kicked out of us by those dastardly slavery-haters.
Lucky i didn't have a commander as bad as me so i survived and died from a stroke many years later but my burial was a bit of a pigs ear, my coffin was washed away by floodwater and the one the funeral directors managed to get hold of was a bit short so they buried me without shoes or my hat, fortunately they never had to squeeze in my morals and dignity because they were dead and buried many years before that.
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