Monday, 20 July 2020

Advice From 1999

I can't remember what i was doing in 1999 and that's normally a good sign that it must have been something good but i do recall a spoken word song called 'Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)' which i pretty much ignored in favour of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers and Blink 182 but i heard it today on the radio and it had some good advice in it which 30 year old Lucy poo-pooed but 51 year old Lucy nodded along to sagely.

Wear Sunscreen - Yep, sunburn hurts but skin cancer hurts even more.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth - true, because before you know it you are 51 and listening to songs you ignored 20 years ago 
Don't worry about the future - The future will come regardless and it is never as scary as you imagine it to be
Do one thing everyday that scares you - Feel free to ignore this one
Sing - I sound like a donkey wearing a bucket over it's head but i still sing when i can, my being so bad is other a problem for other peoples ears.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts - Spot on, apart from trapping your fingers in a car door, having your heart broken in love is one of the most painful experiences in life. 
Floss - Whatever, American stuff, just make sure you brush
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults - Good point, insults say more about the person who makes them, and it says they are a jerk so why worry what a jerk thinks?
Keep your old love letters - Tricky one, keeping love letters if they are not from your spouse could lead to some awkward conversations
Stretch - Throw in a yawn and you are set for the morning.
Get plenty of calcium - i guess
Be kind to your knees - You don't know how much you use them until one of them starts creaking
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them - obviously aimed at men who do seem to love the excuse that 'it's a spare screw' until the thing they spent 3 hours putting together falls down.
Understand that friends come and go - like knickers, they change frequently and some are more comfortable than others, some chaffe and some you hope nobody ever sees but in five years time you will forget the ones you have now as you will have new ones.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle - Not even sure what this means
Travel - As much as possible to places you never imagined.
Don't mess too much with your hair - Ignore. Dye it, cut it, perm it, grow it, shave it and abuse it in every way possible, it grows back.
Be careful whose advice you buy - Best advice on the record. You wouldn't ask a car mechanic for advice on the best home insurance policy to buy as much as you wouldn't ask a hairdresser for advice on whether to buy an Android or Apple phone. If you want advice, ask an expert.

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