Move over Catherine, Anna is in town. History books are full of rulers who abused their power in hilariously insane ways and i may not have 'Great' in my name in the history books, but i was one of the best laughs in those dusty old books. The British compared Russia during my time as 'a storm-threatened ship, manned by a pilot and crew who are all drunk or asleep' but at least it was fun. Well, for me it was anyway
For example, one of my courtiers wanted to marry a Catholic woman and it was a bit of a slow day, it was Russia in mid-winter after-all, so i forced him to instead marry the oldest, wartiest old hag i could muster up, dressed them both up as clowns and made them walk through the streets with farm animals, stripped them naked and made them sleep in a palace made of ice with icy beds, steps, chairs, windows and even logs of ice in a fireplace of ice.
Everyone said it was my greatest prank yet, well they had to else they be my next victim.
One asshat who didn't seem to laugh as long or as loud at my pranks had his tounge removed, another who burnt my dinner was hung and occasionally i would randomly command a person to stand in a corner and impersonate a pig or a cow, as i said, there wasn't much to do in 18th Century Russia and my husband had died after getting into a drinking contest during our wedding and died whilst on the way to our honeymoon so i had to find something to do.
I died at the age of 47 from a terrible kidney stone that made for a slow and painful death but it seems like i am remembered because i heard there was a Disney film of a ruler called Anna who creates an Ice Palace, the only Disney character i could find for the oh-so great Catherine was the name of a Gargoyle, which sounds about right.
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