Monday 30 March 2020

Special Guest Blogger: Henry VII

The last time i counted there were eight King Henry's but of all of them i'm the one that hardly gets a mention, Shakespeare wrote Henry four, five, six, eight but obviously defeating King Richard at Bosworth field and plucking Richard's crown in a hedge wasn't exciting enough to write a dumb play about.
Ending the wars of the roses wasn't good enough although to be fair it was quite confusing, damn near everyone involved was named either Edward, Henry or Richard with three Dukes of Somerset, three Princes of Wales (all Edwards), and five Kings of England.
I did lay the ground for everything that followed and making England rich and bought stability to our nation even if i spent a lot of time fighting off pretenders to the throne.
One of these was a little snot called Perkin Warbeck who said my throne was his, claiming he had been one of the Princes in the tower but was actually a Belgian servant boy who worked for a silk merchant who let Perkin wear some of his wares.
Apparently, hanging around blueknobs rubbed off on Warbeck and he knew the etiquette and could do a passable rightful king of England impression.
These rumors eventually reached the ears of my enemies and the anti-Henry group figured they could pass Perkin off as the son of Edward IV and both the Kings of France and Scotland vouched for the kid and tried to use Perkin to rouse a few armies against the me but in the best royal tradition of the time, i had him captured and hanged.
So i may have been dreary and boring but if you were looking for excitement in Tudor era England, you didn't have long to wait because my son was Henry 8

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