I have a reputation of being a very religious person and at five o'clock every morning I would get up and take an ice cold bath to wash away the cobwebs of indolence from my mind, to grow my moral character and enhance my spiritual awareness of the Christian soul but most importantly the bathroom was free for the daily ritual of making a call on the big white telephone. I always wanted to be a drummer but when i joined the school choir they handed me a glockenspiel and i was like What The Fu.. so they let me have a go at the drum set and that's where it all began, me and Richard set off on a whirlwind of sex and drugs and rock n roll, well no sex, laxatives and romantic ballads anyway.
All those years of not taking drugs and not having sex with Carpenter groupies, i still remember the first time I didn't lose my virginity and how it was not smoking a cigarette afterwards and thinking yeah, nobody has not made love to like that before.
I spent my whole music career forever not leaping into bed and since then I've not had sex with literally thousands of men but there's nothing like your first time of not having sex.
In the mid-1970s Richard developed an addiction to Methaqualone, or mandies, but i had my own problems of a weight of 91 pounds or 6st 7lb.
I was misusing laxatives and was admitted to Hospital and forced fed intravenously which turned out to be what killed me, not the anorexia.
The procedure was too successful and i quickly gained weight in such a short time that it put a strain on my heart, which was already weak from years of not eating a proper diet and i died aged 32.
If i had known i was going to die so young i would have been at it like a jackhammer and sniffing stuff up my nose like a demented hoover, but oh well.
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