Sure, i liked getting the bone on as much as the next person, if the next person is Stormy Daniels or Jenna Jameson, and as i got older i went for younger and younger guys so in many ways i was the original cougar.
You don't get to be called 'The Great' just sleeping with any Tom, Dick or Ivor, once i noticed a new hot guy, i would have my doctor check him out to see if he had any STDs, and i would get my advisors to find out his politics and so i didn't want to waste time on someone who was a dud in the sack, i had one of my ladies-in-waiting, Countess Praskovya Aleksandrovna Bruce, take him for a test drive first.
During my reign, i never had to endure a cold bed and if they were up to my particular high standards, i would reward them with land, money and titles, Grigory Potemkin went from a common Guardsman to a General in one glorious baby oil filled afternoon.
One guy who wanted to be the King of Poland even got Poland after i invaded it and put him on the throne, what a night that must have been, who needs a bloody stallion when during the height of passion, you are with a man who can get you to invade a country and make him King!
So no horses involved in my death unfortunately and i died aged 67 of a stroke in bed screaming and thrashing about wildly which to be fair, was very close to how i had spent the previous 50 years anyway.
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