Special Guest Blogger: Prince

Nobody seems to mention my being voted 'the Sexiest Vegetarian of 2006' but early on in my career it was thought that i was gay despite it being obvious to anyone who paid the smallest amount of attention that i loved women although it was only the creepy weirdo's who cared about what anyone did in their bedroom.
I was admired for my ball skills in college, again, not gay, it was basketball despite being 5' 2" although admitedly that photo of me naked on the cover of the Lovesexy Album didn't help, i was about the only person ever who looked less manly when he's not wearing lady clothes but i was certainly effeminate.
My only fist fight was with Sinead O'Connor over her cover of my 'Nothing Compares 2U' song as i hated the way she swore, so i told her, she spat at me and probably the most girly fistfight of all time ensued. I never had that problem with Chaka Khan and The Bangles, Chaka would have knocked my block off.
I also upset a few people by refusing to take part in the charity single 'We Are The World' but i did write a single and give all the proceeds to the Charity, it wasn't because i was fine with kids starving to death, it was solely because i didn't want to stand between Kenny Rogers and Bruce Springsteen while singing a Michael Jackson song.
Talking of Jackson, i was often mistaken for him in the late 80s, he was the Thriller guy and i was the Purple guy singing about doves crying but i was also the guy who would later make the seemingly insane decision to change his name to an unpronounceable squiggle.
Today's pop acts just show up to the studio to sing words they didn't write while real musicians like me do all the stuff that requires actual musical ability, on my debut album i played 27 different instruments including a mini-Moog and a poly-Moog, whatever the hell they are.
I died from an overdose of painkillers, strangely enough turning Purple and making a noise like a dove crying as it got pushed through a shredder.