Special Guest Blogger: Pagan Godess Sheela Na Gigs

I was lewd, rude, nude and very crude so perfect to be a Pagan Goddess and i represented so many aspects and did it all with my vagina.
I was originally called Cecile in France and was popular for being a wise woman who people would pray to if they wanted to avert ill luck or were possessed by an evil spirit and i would chase away anything demonic or bad by showing them my Bajingo because we all know that woman's genitals are scary, it's not like men enjoy looking at naked women or anything.
When i came to the UK with the Normans during the conquest thingy, i was particularly popular in Ireland and they changed my name from Cecile to the Irish name 'Sheela' and 'Gigs' is English slang for lady parts and what amazing lady parts they were, hence why i was so famous for them.  
The Christians, not having a proud Vag showing diety of their own, adopted me and carved me into their Monasteries, Churches and other places of religion, placing my image of completely naked, legs open with private parts on display above doors and windows to ward off evil spirits but i also had a secondary role as a fertility Goddess and the Early Christians used my figurines at weddings and births, showing my wares to all and sundry.
So, what happened to this bawdy, sexually liberated, very wise—goddess?
Well over time i became a warning against the sins of lust, a reminder for churchgoers to keep their minds pure and firmly on Godly things and not on how much longer they have to listen to this guy banging on lust being hideous and sinfully corrupting before they can get back to doing some sinful corruption of their own.
At some point the Christians got their rosary beads in a knot and decided that having a naked female showing off her glorious foof alongside scripture images was a tad too much even for them, and remember that this is an institution which has more scandals than saints, so they decided they would take their chance with evil entering the building and began to remove me from their places of worship as un-Christian.
I doubt many people have heard of me now and i have gone the way of most Pagan deities but i like to think that i was a sacred symbol of women’s nurturing and a life-affirming reminder of female power...with a very nice Vag.