I starred in over 40 films and made a guest appearance on most sitcoms but i am mostly famous for slapping a Beverly Hills cop and being a hopeless romantic with nine husbands of my own, i had many more husbands that were married to other people but my husband number 6 (i think he was 6, it gets confusing) designed the Barbie doll.
Back in the '60s and '70s, rich men were to be admired and looked up to and then i forced them to cut a wedding cake with me, i had a strict criteria for my husbands, I want a man who's kind and understanding and he must have more money than i have time to spend it but i was a marvelous housekeeper.
Every time I divorced my husband, i kept his house! I always said marriage should be a fifty-fifty proposition. He should be at least fifty years old, and have at least fifty-million dollars.
Old people like me didn't sit around stagnating watching game shows and talking about the good old day's, i made a fitness video aged 76 which was pretty much me moving my hands while leaning on a chair while two fine, young, nubile, muscle bound men did all the exercising in very, very tight shorts.
As a Hollywood celebrity i was involved in the required feud, mine was with Elke Sommer who made fun of my weight, i said she looked like a balding, 100-year-old grandmother' and lived in the worst section of Los Angeles.
My final act was with the motorcycle policeman who pulled me over for expired tags but he was taking forever so i asked him why he was taking so long and do you know who i am etc etc and he told me to F*** Off, so i did and when he caught up with me i slapped him around the head.
I spent three days in prison for that and for driving without a license and possessing an open container of Jack Daniel's.
I died fifty days short of my 100th but dah-lings, i love you, I really do. Life in the fire and all that. Always good for my fans to meet me.
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