I said to my people that under Communism they would have so much access to food that they could pile it on top of each other and reach God but then we banned God saying he did not exist and as they soon found out neither did the food so it was true but what Romania did have was The Genius of the Carpathians, aka me, and a magnificent scepter which was so great even Salvador Dali wrote to me to say how awesome it was and with facial hair like that, he would know magnificent when he sees it.
As i did have some enemies, i was convinced that someone might be trying to poison me through my clothing so i only wore each set of clothes just once then sent them to the incinerator but with great success there is always a price to pay and i became scared of things normal people don’t have to be scared about such as them trying to storm the gates of my home so i cleared an area of 19 Churches and 30,000 homes and built a Palace surrounded by only the best security equipment to stop any invaders, strangers or unwanted relative making it inside.
Strangely the other nations Communist leaders never seemed to warm to me very much but the West did, the British even knighted me and the French granted me it's Legion of Honor but my secure Palace shielded me from the outside so i had no idea just how jealous my own people were of me.
1989 was not a good year for Communism and the entire country flipped out in an uprising and i thought i would make a reassuring speech to soothe the crowd but it only made them angrier and i thought it would be prudent to get the hell out of there but they caught me and tied my wife and myself together and shot us both.
That was on Christmas Day and just to add insult to injury, the last thing i heard was that the Queen of Britain had revoked my knighthood.
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